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Sharing her out of no where

Posted by on Mar. 16, 2014 at 3:00 PM
  • 5 Replies

 I have a beautiful daughter, she is one and a half years old. Her father has never been apart of her life until just recently because he has a baby on the way he decided he wants to have her grow up with her brother. The child will be here in 2 months, and now her dad has told me he wants to have her every other weekend. He has only had her without me there two times now. I am very nervous about the whole thing. The new baby of his comming and the fact that he is going to be married. I am scared my daughter will end up loving their family better then the little one with just me and her that we have had her whole life so far. His family has a lot of druggies in it and recovering druggies. I am so scared what she is going to be around. But I don't think I have a choice, as of right now I have all rights to her her signed the papers for that. But they told us that he can change that at anytime. 

I have a feeling that time is comming. 

I just want what is best for my daughter, she is my whole world. I am a very good mom I take great care of her and try to do whatever is best for her which is why I have let him visit when he decided out of no where that he wanted to this past two months.

advise, suggestions, kind words, experience anything you want to give would be great.

by on Mar. 16, 2014 at 3:00 PM
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Replies (1-5):
by on Mar. 16, 2014 at 3:24 PM
1 mom liked this

 No suggestions but ((hugs))

by on Mar. 16, 2014 at 3:50 PM

thank you  ((hugs))

by New Member on Mar. 16, 2014 at 3:58 PM
I'm sorry I know how that is my ex and I divorced and he gets him every other week because in Arkansas if you are divorced, you must share joint custody unless you can prove the other parent unfit and if you can then you get full custody. My DS is fixing to turn 4 and this routine has worked but has been very hard on me. I love that he has his father in the picture, and that he gets best of both worlds but I'm scared shitless of him loving his dad more then me and his step dad. And that one day he will want to strictly stay with his dad, these thoughts haunt me all the time.
by Nannerz on Mar. 16, 2014 at 4:22 PM
If he has signed over his legal rights to her, he is now legally not a parent to her anymore and has no more right to see her than the stranger down the street.

If he tries to push to see her, I would talk to a lawyer (or even legal aid) and get everything legally written down so you both know what can and can not happen.
by on Mar. 16, 2014 at 4:55 PM
I can't imagine the emotional turmoil of having to "share" your daughter.
I am sure all of the emotions that come along with this situation are very overwhelming.
You do sound like a great mom... I know letting him come around was a really really hard thing to allow, but you having done that shows that you truly have put yourself aside, wanting what is best for her.
I wish I had wise advice, but I don't. I am guessing you already have a lawyer?
Maybe it would be wise to not wait on him to excersise his rights, but to be proactive and get things rolling yourself so at least you have some feeling of control.

Hang in there mama, and keep being awesome.

Your daughter will not love his family more. You are her mom, the is no replacement for mama, ever. She knows what your heart sounds like from the inside, that's a bond that cannot be replaced.
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