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which do you think?

Posted by on Apr. 20, 2016 at 3:30 PM
  • 10 Replies
I need some honest opinions here. I go to my lAwyer Saturday and want to do the best thing for my baby while setting up a parenting plan. My baby is due June 30. Do you think the baby should be with me the most for the first year as far as bonding goes? I want her to develop a bond with her father also would it harm her to have overnights with him? I'm confused what is best.
by on Apr. 20, 2016 at 3:30 PM
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Replies (1-10):
WILDCATGAL78
by Gold Member on Apr. 20, 2016 at 4:00 PM

My opinion is probably not popular. If you're nursing I would say the baby needs to be with you more at first. So you can feed on demand. Pumping is an option but not every woman pumps a lot of ounces to be able to send to Dad's (or even daycare). If you're going to nurse, can you compromise? Can Dad come to your home for visits? If you end up being a great pumper or use formula then, I would say the parenting should be equal.  I'm happy that you decided to keep the baby. Do you have other children? 

Luke8212013
by Gold Member on Apr. 20, 2016 at 4:06 PM
That's tough, but it's important that dad gets to bond with the baby too.
I think overnights would be hard at first- especially if your breastfeeding. But, you could always see if you're able to pump and provide enough milk while your away from baby. Good luck
KylersMom8-16-7
by Gold Member on Apr. 20, 2016 at 9:44 PM
1 mom liked this
If you're breastfeeding I think that no overnights for the first year is reasonable.
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Mom2Just1
by Platinum Member on Apr. 21, 2016 at 12:14 AM
I breastfeed. So overnights would never happen. Thankfully my husband agrees.
sonnyswoman75
by on Apr. 21, 2016 at 1:10 AM
I am formula feeding since I still plan on working and going to school. I have an 18 year old son but He doesn't live with me.

Quoting WILDCATGAL78:

My opinion is probably not popular. If you're nursing I would say the baby needs to be with you more at first. So you can feed on demand. Pumping is an option but not every woman pumps a lot of ounces to be able to send to Dad's (or even daycare). If you're going to nurse, can you compromise? Can Dad come to your home for visits? If you end up being a great pumper or use formula then, I would say the parenting should be equal.  I'm happy that you decided to keep the baby. Do you have other children? 

WILDCATGAL78
by Gold Member on Apr. 21, 2016 at 1:59 AM
In that case, unfortunately then overnights could be a possibility.



Quoting sonnyswoman75: I am formula feeding since I still plan on working and going to school. I have an 18 year old son but He doesn't live with me.

Quoting WILDCATGAL78:

My opinion is probably not popular. If you're nursing I would say the baby needs to be with you more at first. So you can feed on demand. Pumping is an option but not every woman pumps a lot of ounces to be able to send to Dad's (or even daycare). If you're going to nurse, can you compromise? Can Dad come to your home for visits? If you end up being a great pumper or use formula then, I would say the parenting should be equal.  I'm happy that you decided to keep the baby. Do you have other children? 

cheergurl84
by Member on Apr. 21, 2016 at 4:57 AM
If formula feeding, then of course dad should have overnights too. Why would you be damaging him leaving him overnight with his father? I'd say it would cause more harm not to include him. It may not be easy for you, but it is fair.
melindabelcher
by Gold Member on Apr. 21, 2016 at 7:40 AM
If formula feeding baby qualifies for overnights with dad even a 2-3 day schedule.
There's no reason you need the full year to bond. Enjoy your time with baby and the father should have the same.
mrswillie
by Bronze Member on Apr. 21, 2016 at 7:45 AM
Since you were formula feeding, I think equal time would work.
la_bella_vita
by on Apr. 21, 2016 at 2:05 PM

Most father's get 50/50 or way more than every other weekend. It's always best to create you own parenting plan and take it in front of a judge. If not, a mediator should work. If not, you'll have to battle it out in court but like I said most dad's are not shunned. Breastfeeding doesn't always matter.

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