Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Help! My baby is killing me!

Posted by on Aug. 6, 2016 at 12:49 PM
  • 16 Replies

Hello, 

During my last pregnancy (baby #5) I started to have severe joint pain and inflammation. After baby was born I was diagnosed with the autoimmune disease Lupus. They wanted me to stop breastfeeding so I could go on certain meds. I was "supposed" to have her weaned by end of July....yeah she's still not. I don't want this to be about bottle vs breast (I called Dr Hale's hotline and honestly they were more concerned about me being part of their research than whether the drug was safe for my baby, which yes I totally understand without people like me they can't really do research, but they really couldn't say that it was safe or not either) so anyway, she's 7 months old and takes a few bottles of formula a day and the rest is breast. Because of the Lupus I'm supposed to rest more (I have 5 kids, I laughed when the dr said rest!) I feel like crud all the time and am extremely extremely exhausted. Well for the past month or so my 7 month old wants to nurse every 2 hours at night. Every time I wake up to feed her I break out into a cold sweat, shake really bad and feel like I'm going to pass out. I'm not getting sleep and my body is literally shutting down. I cry every night because I don't know what to do. She was sleeping through the night from like 2-5 months but now it's all over the place. I thought maybe teething, or being to hot or cold? I don't know? Obviously she's not really killing me but my health is going down hill fast because I don't sleep and then have to run after 5 kids all day while dealing with an autoimmune disease. I'm at a loss as to what to do. Any advice?

by on Aug. 6, 2016 at 12:49 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
momofnatalie
by on Aug. 6, 2016 at 12:57 PM

First of all, I am so sorry you are going through this.  Do you think you can get some family support to give you some help?  I know how important sleep is when you are battling an auto immune disease.  Next, can you start pumping and freezing a supply for the next few weeks so that you can still supply her breast milk. 

suomynona_amam
by on Aug. 6, 2016 at 12:58 PM
You should be able to get more sleep if shes in bed with you, but I can see how that's not really a long term solution since you're trying to wean her.
Do you have anyone that could start waking up with her during the night? Even if it's just the first time she wakes up so you can get a block of a few straight hours.
I weaned my first child by adding two ounce bottles every other time she asked to nurse and then skipping certain times that she preferred nursing like before naps and over night.
I'm sorry. I really wish I had better advice, but I just don't. She was easy to wean and my other kids were 2 and 4 when I weaned them so I just said no.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
WaterorWine
by Member on Aug. 6, 2016 at 1:07 PM
I'm so sorry :-(

First of all, formula will keep her full longer at night. I know she's refusing to give up the breast. It's so hard with breastfed babies. Maybe your husband can give her a bottle? Sometimes they are willingness to take a bottle from people besides mom. Also, right before you're ready to go to bed give her a "dream feed" bottle. Don't wake her up just feed her in her sleep. That will fill her up and she's more likely to take the bottle because she's not as aware. This should hopefully give you a 4-6 hour block of sleep. She is probably going through a growth spurt or developmental leap. It's temporary. I wouldn't do cereal in the bottle, that's not recommended anymore and it's a choking hazard. your first priority should be weaning her so you can get on meds. Maybe ask a family Member to stay with you for a few weeks? Or get a babysitter for a few hours during the day so you can nap.
mommyofone123
by Member on Aug. 6, 2016 at 1:39 PM

see that's the strange thing. A friend mentioned giving her a bottle right before bed and she'll drink the full 6 oz and then she still wakes up 2 hours later wanting to nurse. :( Unfortunately we have no support system at all (my family is 300 miles away and his won't help) so it's just us. My husband is already having issues falling asleep while driving to work (he's been trying to help me as much he can)(he leaves at 4:30 am for work) so I don't want to wake him. 

Quoting WaterorWine: I'm so sorry :-( First of all, formula will keep her full longer at night. I know she's refusing to give up the breast. It's so hard with breastfed babies. Maybe your husband can give her a bottle? Sometimes they are willingness to take a bottle from people besides mom. Also, right before you're ready to go to bed give her a "dream feed" bottle. Don't wake her up just feed her in her sleep. That will fill her up and she's more likely to take the bottle because she's not as aware. This should hopefully give you a 4-6 hour block of sleep. She is probably going through a growth spurt or developmental leap. It's temporary. I wouldn't do cereal in the bottle, that's not recommended anymore and it's a choking hazard. your first priority should be weaning her so you can get on meds. Maybe ask a family Member to stay with you for a few weeks? Or get a babysitter for a few hours during the day so you can nap.


MusherMaggie
by Gold Member on Aug. 6, 2016 at 4:16 PM
The only thing I can suggest is researching an anti-inflammatory diet. You would feel better, and it will compliment the medication. Teething and growth spurts are certainly disruptive to sleep. How old are your other children?

When my siblings and I were very young, our mother was recovering from a terrible burn accident. When she needed to rest, she brought us into her room for quiet time. We could read, color or talk quietly. Most of the time we woud up napping as well on quilts on the floor.

Margarett RBC Zavodnyteal ribbon

MusherMaggie
by Gold Member on Aug. 6, 2016 at 4:50 PM
I'm sorry if I mentioned it before, but paced bottlefeeding procedure may help her feel fuller. Use the slowest flow nipple possible, baby held in a sitting position, bottle parallel to the floor, burping after every ounce. This allows her brain to register that her tummy is full.
Stevensmomma
by Silver Member on Aug. 6, 2016 at 4:55 PM
What about bottles at night with dh feeding so u can sleep?
spacedementia
by Member on Aug. 6, 2016 at 5:02 PM
You have to wean her completely and soon. You're in the middle of a flare that is probably not going to go away until you have things under control. If you get worse you will be of no help to anyone.

When I was diagnosed I had to take prednisone, methotrexate and Celebrex to get my immune system under control and be rid of the inflammation, it took awhile. I wasn't breastfeeding at the time but they told me not to get pregnant while taking those medications so I doubt breastfeeding would be OK either.

I'm so sorry, it just really sucks to be stuck with this.
Mom2Just1
by Platinum Member on Aug. 6, 2016 at 5:33 PM

I would look into a change in diet. Unfortunately weaning on your terms (no matter the reason) results in baby refusing to wean.  I hope it gets better for you!

Daisypath Anniversary tickersLilypie Kids Birthday tickers Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickersLilypie Second Birthday tickers

Lilypie Breastfeeding tickers



DisabledVet
by on Aug. 6, 2016 at 7:21 PM

Wean her to the bottle. What good are you going to be to her, or any of your kids, if you don't put your health first? 

I used to give my daughter rice cereal in her bottle at night.  This way she slept all night.  If she's feeding every 2 hours at night, try the cereal. 

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)