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Name Drama

Posted by on Aug. 20, 2008 at 7:42 AM
  • 22 Replies

Ok I have a question!! 

Well before I had my son my family knew we were considering naming him Damien and almost everyone in my family besides a select few told me they didnt like that name and would never call him by his name.  Well we named him Damien and my family besides those few have never called him by his name just litlle nicknames.  It bothers me cause those nicknames is not his name.  What do you think I should do or say to my family that wont call him by his real name?

by on Aug. 20, 2008 at 7:42 AM
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Replies (1-10):
GraciesMama6208
by on Aug. 20, 2008 at 8:19 AM

I would explain to them how much it hurts you that they refuse to call him by his name because they don't like it.  I would ask that they call him by his name.  If that isn't enough to get them to call him by his name, which might not be their preference but is HIS name, then I would consider going to counseling (and I'm not joking).  Perhaps a counselor could help you by giving ideas about what to do that would be positive.

MissMandaz
by on Aug. 20, 2008 at 8:23 AM


Quoting GraciesMama6208:

I would explain to them how much it hurts you that they refuse to call him by his name because they don't like it.  I would ask that they call him by his name.  If that isn't enough to get them to call him by his name, which might not be their preference but is HIS name, then I would consider going to counseling (and I'm not joking).  Perhaps a counselor could help you by giving ideas about what to do that would be positive.

I do have to say i like her answer!!

~Mandaz

AbbyBaby
by on Aug. 20, 2008 at 8:31 AM

I rather like her idea, call them by nicknames.

Quoting MissMandaz:

Try getting them to call him his middle name instead of nicknames.

I would honestly be pist. I would first try to tell them how i feel about it. and If that didnt work, I think i would go three year old on them and start calling them by nicknames and see how they reacted. I have learned that with my friends that dont have kids sometimes i have to talk to them like they are three so that they get the point. Its a method that I have found to work.

~Mandaz


Jace1028
by on Aug. 20, 2008 at 8:37 AM

Wow, that is kind of a stab in the heart, don't ya think? I would not take him around those people and just say to them, "It makes me feel disrespected when you do not use my sons name." There is nothing wrong with that name. But I would not put up with it. They are acting like they have a say in what his name should have been!! I would be soooo mad! I would keep my son away from people who disrespect you, family or not. That's my opinion, though. I am very disrespected by a few people on my husbands side. They are very rude to me because I do not have them babysit Jace. I don't need a babysitter. I am a SAHM!! GAH PPL! =) So I just refuse to go around them until they grow up and they know why they don't see Jace.

Hope I helped!

Kadi

mattel_mom
by on Aug. 20, 2008 at 8:42 AM

I woud tell them that his name is ___ and not ___ and if you can't have the respect to call him by his name then I am afraid I can't let you around him. In todays society it is very important to be comfortable in your own skin and believe me, I have a name I hate, so I only go by my nickname. I started hating my name when other people made a big deal about it and didn't like it. They should respect you and your choices.

Live4HerSmile
by on Aug. 20, 2008 at 8:47 AM

My grandmother told my great-grandmother who hated my mom's name (Shevawn) and would only call her "Missy" (her middle name is Marie...Dunno where "Missy" came from) up until she was 10 or something:  "I don't care if you like the name or not.  That wasn't an option on the birth certificate form.  If I had named her "Shit" you would call her "Shit" because that would be her name."

My daughter's name is Mackenzie, which I kinda hate, not gonna lie.  (Long story that involves my husband being an a$$.)  We only ever call her Kenzie.  My mother-in-law INSISTS on calling her "Mackenzie" in the most obnoxious voice and inflection.  It's like finger-nails on chalkboard to me.

MommyC419
by on Aug. 20, 2008 at 9:51 AM

I totally agree here!

Quoting mattel_mom:

I woud tell them that his name is ___ and not ___ and if you can't have the respect to call him by his name then I am afraid I can't let you around him. In todays society it is very important to be comfortable in your own skin and believe me, I have a name I hate, so I only go by my nickname. I started hating my name when other people made a big deal about it and didn't like it. They should respect you and your choices.


jhayden
by on Aug. 20, 2008 at 12:35 PM

well when they are talking to him just say he thinks you're talking to someonelse cause his name is Damien. IAfter 2 or 3x of that people tend to get the point. Had to do that with my second

mrs_k_sarnik
by on Aug. 21, 2008 at 5:47 PM

My family did the same thing. I just finally had to tell them it bothered me.  I said" please use his name. I want him to learn it. When he figures out what his name is, then maybe some nicknames. " It seems to be working.

in loveWife to David baby boyMommy to Jayden

amberleestull
by on Aug. 21, 2008 at 6:04 PM

hi! my name is amber. i have a son (hes 4 now) his name is cyruss. you know, nobody in my family liked the name when we picked it. we decided to name him that anyways. he is my baby i get to pick the name, right? well anyways...after a while everyone got used to the name....but im just like you...i hate nick names...bc noone realy liked the name cyruss, they thought they would call him cy cy..or cy..well if i wanted him to be called that i would have named him that! anyways...my advice would to be just ask them nicely not to call him that. it took a while for everyone not to call cyruss by nicknames...but a lil bit of me complaining and reminding them , they adventually got the hint. everytime someone would call him cy cy or cy i would say no dont call him that his name is cyruss...and it was to the point that he didnt like it either....he would actually say "that is not my name...my name is cyruss!" he wouldnt let them call him anything but cyruss. it was cute! but yea thats my advice...jst keep reminding them and do it infront of your child, so he knows and maybe he will be like cyruss and not like it...lol....but yea so just explain to them its your child you would appreciate them calling him by his name...hope it helps! let me know how it goes! good luck!

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