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time alone...

Posted by on Oct. 10, 2008 at 11:58 PM
  • 20 Replies

i love my life as a mommy and a wife....but i just want a night all to myself....why should i feel guilty about that...i feel trapped sometimes, and i dont like it.

in loveblowing bubblesbreastfeeding

by on Oct. 10, 2008 at 11:58 PM
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Replies (1-10):
gaalar
by on Oct. 11, 2008 at 12:01 AM

You know sometimes I feel the same way.  I just want a night to relax and not have to do everything.  I know that will never happen since my hubby can' do anything without me.  Oh well I have the next 18 years until I get a night alone.  LOL

penguina1980
by on Oct. 11, 2008 at 12:18 AM

I feel the same way.  I feel guilty for giving the baby to my husband so I can take my time in the shower.  I know I feel that way because my husband works all day and so to me it doesn't matter that I have had my 2 month old stuck to my chest all day and that i have still managed to clean the house and pay bills.  I still feel guilty.  I hate that.  I am thankful that my son now sleeps through the night.  I no longer need to pass the baby off for hours at a time to catch up on sleep.  I wish I could offer some advice on how to get over the guilt but I havent gotten over it yet.  Even though my husband is constantly telling me "It's ok he's my son too."

frndlyfn
by on Oct. 11, 2008 at 12:34 AM

The only time i get truely "alone" time is either when i am sick (cant get out of bed)  or when my dad is around, he will send us out of house or take daughter with him so we get a break.

newmom2be08
by on Oct. 11, 2008 at 1:08 AM

You are not alone!  I feel that way too.  In fact, my DH gets up with our DS on the weekends and that is my time to sleep in.  I look forward to it all week long.  I feel that my whole life revolves around our son.  Sometimes, I just want a break...I think all mommies feel the same way. 

impulsive1
by on Oct. 11, 2008 at 1:54 PM

I have a part time job that gives me "time alone". I work in the evenings at WalMart which gives me a discount at a place we shop at anyways. It keeps me sane. There are customers and coworkers but no house to clean or children crying or needing something. Just a few hours away does the trick for me. Maybe you could find something that benefits your family but gives you "time alone" and then you won't feel guilty.

Mikeysmom1001
by on Oct. 11, 2008 at 2:14 PM

You are not alone. You should not feel guilty about wanting and needing a little time for yourself!

lilmomma4
by on Oct. 11, 2008 at 6:23 PM

I think a lot of moms feel that way. It's like once you become a mom, you really don't get a lot of opportunities to take time for just you. I think in my whole 13yrs of parenting I got a total of 7 days that was totally just for me...no kids, no husband/BF. But, if you do get a chance to have "alone time", don't feel bad about it. Being a mom is a tough job whether you work at home, stay home or work outside the home, and just take advantage of that time and do what you want to do. :)

smartmom0818
by on Oct. 11, 2008 at 6:50 PM

I am 25 and a single mom. I don't even know what to do with mysekf anymore when my daughter is gone w/ grandma or something. I had to grow up overnight when her dad left and I just forgot how to have fun, I forgot who I was, hell now i don't even know who I am. I don't know... I know exactly how you feel. I feel trapped in the single mommy box, like well, you don't have a life outside your child. But if she comes first, why can't i live too? I mean, what about when she gets older and leaves me to go hang out??? I won't even know what to do with myself and i refuse to be 30 acting all pathetic and lonely waiting on her to get home so I can have someone to talk to. I ws thinking about this the other day, I am about to start living. Doing things I want to do, even if it's just me and kiddo, or me by myself. My younger sister passed away in Augest she was only 20... Life is too short to feel this way. I hope it gets better for us all.


 

fallentears1986
by on Oct. 11, 2008 at 6:57 PM

I think we all feel this way at some point or another. Don't feel guilty. Even the experts say that you need some time to yourself. Is there anyone you could get to watch the baby for a night so you can go out and have a good time? luckily I have a great MIL and parents that can watch my daughter ever now and again while I go out which hasnt been that much actually but its comforting to know the options there if I need it.

Lilypie 1st Birthday Ticker
LuckieLadie
by on Oct. 11, 2008 at 8:33 PM

You should absolutely try to enjoy some time alone when you can, it does NOT make you a bad mom to admit you need some "me time". Try to pass your baby to a friend or family member for at least a few hours a week if you can, take a nap or get a massage, do whatever makes you feel good about yourself so you can return to your baby fresh and rejuvenated :)

A few times when I was sooooo tired and didn't have anyone to help me during the day I found a babysitter online, she came over for a few hours and watched my baby while I took a nap in the next room. I had the monitor so I knew what was going on the whole time and it was such a nice break.

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