I'm about to go CRAZY I seriously want to KILL my SO!!!!

i've been there girl...hell i am there...i'm working on my man though...so i feel ya

I just dont know what to do.. I cant take his damn debit card from him bc then he gets pissed off I try to give him a buget and somehow SOMETHING happens.. He has a stupid streetbike and I'm to the point where I'm gana tell him if you get ANY worse that bike is gone and you will pay off everything with it and then you can save your fucking money and get another one!!

Quoting momiiof2:

i've been there girl...hell i am there...i'm working on my man though...so i feel ya

How old is he? I'd sit him down (when he hasn't asked for money) & tell him how it's gonna be. Let him know that if he doesn't pay his own bills they're not gettin paid & he can suffer the consequences. Explain that if he honestly doesn't have the money @ the time bills are due that you'll help out but if he's out blowing his money it's his loss & he will have to pay you back. This is just what I would do. GL

i know girl..it sucks...right now,my man's the only one working and we need rent money..and there are times he blows it on stupid crap then what we need..he's had a sheltered life so he never had to do anything for himself..right now we need food and things for our son,so he's working under the table for a friend..

all you can do really is work on him and make him understand..usually ending in a fight,but your point gets across..

if you need to talk further i'm here girl

Since you two aren't married and he refers to his income as HIS money, sit him down and flat out tell him that you will no longer bail him out. If he can't contrubite HIS money, you are not going to contribute YOUR money.

Then STICK TO IT! Do not cave no matter how desperate he is. If he loses his insurance or something, then he will begin to see that his habits are destructive. But, if you keep bailing him out, he will never learn and you will constantly fight over this.

He's 20.. And I am we're gana talk about it when he gets home and I know he's gana get pissed off and probably leave and some how its gana be my fault.. But I'm not paying his bills.. I seriously would not have a problem helping him if he new how to save and one week he had to many bills to pay and couldnt pay them all that wouldnt bother me but I'm not gana sit here and let him blow 800 dollars on stupid shit and me pay everything.. He's eatting out with his friends right now(blowing money) and it makes me so pissed because my son and I have sat at home the past 3 days because and I mean seriously sat at home.. I cant take him to the park or anywhere by myself because I'm 8 months pregnant and cant keep up with him outside right now because I have to constantly sit because walking gives me strong contractions.. And he is out with his friends blowing money while we're sitting here eatting left overs and cooking little meals because I dont want to go buy anything because I dont want to spend any extra money

Quoting Armywife6:

How old is he? I'd sit him down (when he hasn't asked for money) & tell him how it's gonna be. Let him know that if he doesn't pay his own bills they're not gettin paid & he can suffer the consequences. Explain that if he honestly doesn't have the money @ the time bills are due that you'll help out but if he's out blowing his money it's his loss & he will have to pay you back. This is just what I would do. GL

keep YOUR money for what YOU want, pay YOUR bills. dont pay shit of his because he has HIS MONEY.

Yeah my fiance is the same way. My money is our money (which means his) and his money is only his...god forbid let me ask him for some money...I don't know what he spends it on..he spend a hundred dollars one day and had absolutely nothing so show for it!

You know what you gave me a GREAT IDEA!! haha I might threaten him to get another job.. Which he's gana HATE but I dont give a crap.. Its gana be VERY hard for him to get another job due to his current job its rotating shifts but I dont care.. He needs to learn

Quoting momiiof2:

i know girl..it sucks...right now,my man's the only one working and we need rent money..and there are times he blows it on stupid crap then what we need..he's had a sheltered life so he never had to do anything for himself..right now we need food and things for our son,so he's working under the table for a friend..

all you can do really is work on him and make him understand..usually ending in a fight,but your point gets across..

if you need to talk further i'm here girl

Thats what I did last week.. He wanted me to pay his truck payment and I wouldnt so he put it off until this week and he was gana pay it well something happened with his bank account to where they wouldnt let him take out any money.. Because he has to pay it with cash they wont accept debit cards and he doesnt have checks and I believed him but instead of putting that money to the side and telling himself I have to make sure I save 260 he goes and blows it on stupid shit!! So now when he ask me to pay it again I'm gana tell him no you can sell your motorcycle to pay your truck payment I really dont care..

Quoting sissychristi:

Since you two aren't married and he refers to his income as HIS money, sit him down and flat out tell him that you will no longer bail him out. If he can't contrubite HIS money, you are not going to contribute YOUR money.

Then STICK TO IT! Do not cave no matter how desperate he is. If he loses his insurance or something, then he will begin to see that his habits are destructive. But, if you keep bailing him out, he will never learn and you will constantly fight over this.