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im so mad

Posted by on Nov. 16, 2009 at 11:34 PM
  • 11 Replies

So we came up with a boy name but hadn't picked out a girl name. He wasn't supposed to tell anybody the name. I didn't want anybody to know. He wanted to find out the sex but I didn't. So I said fine as long as nobody finds out the name so that can be a surprise to them I will be fine with finding out the sex. So its been a couple weeks and I have talked myself into finding out the sex and now I really want to. But he told his mom and sister the name. It makes me so mad. Then he got really mad at them for telling me that he told them. So I told him now that everybody knows the name, we aren't finding out the sex. Now since I talked myself into finding out the sex, I really want to know now, and I don't want to wait until the baby is born. But then nothing will be a surprise. So Im thinking about changing the name, but I really like that name. Im so mad I don't even know what to do. I didn't want to tell anybody about the pregnancy until Christmas but he couldn't keep his mouth shut about that either. What should I do? Change the name or not find out the sex? It really meant a lot to me that nobody found out the name and I figured something as simple as that, since he really wanted to find out the sex, that he would keep his mouth shut about it.

by on Nov. 16, 2009 at 11:34 PM
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by on Nov. 16, 2009 at 11:37 PM

If you really love this name then try to let it go...  in a while this will fade away.    You'll be glad your son has this name!

I understand your frustration, though!!

Birth is not only about making babies. Birth is about making mothers ~ strong, competent, capable mothers who trust themselves and know their inner strength.

~Barbara Katz Rothma

When you change the way you view birth, the way you birth will change. -Mongan

by on Nov. 16, 2009 at 11:37 PM

 I can feel your frustration mama, but honestly I'd just be super happy he was SOOO excited! He wants to tell everyone! He's SOOOO happy you're having a baby! I know it may seem disappointing now, but when that baby comes out, it won't matter at all! The baby being healthy and happy will be all that matters!

Oh, and if you are honestly upset about it all, I'd sit him down and just let him know how you feel and how his actions hurt you! GL mama!

Stick Figure Family at 

by on Nov. 16, 2009 at 11:40 PM

Ok maybe try not tellin anyone what ur havin when u find out, then it will still be a surprise to them. U know? Don't tell ur Dh either since u already told him ur not finding out the sex. U know? I don't know if this helps but its something u could still do.

by on Nov. 16, 2009 at 11:47 PM

I agree with the previous comments. I understand your frustration but it will pass. You are lucky to have a man that is so involved and excited...everybody doesn't have that. Congratulations on your baby! If you really like the name you have picked stick with it. Its upsetting now but when your baby gets here your happiness will make you forget all about it:)

by on Nov. 16, 2009 at 11:57 PM

You are all right. It will pass. But right now it just sucks because im giving him everything he wants in this and he can't respect me enough to not blab one simple thing. he told his family before I was ready to tell people, he told them the name, and I agreed on finding out the sex. I just think I should have some say in it since it is my body completely changing. I am glad he is happy about it, because I never had that with my first, but I feel betrayed right now. I know it could be worse, and yes all that matters is a healthy baby. I just have so much stress right now anyway and him doing stuff like that doesn't help matters any.  BTW I am annoyed anyway tonight because I have seriously been sitting here for the last 8 hours only moving to go to the bathroom, doing drug cards and my care plan for clinical tom. and its now 11 and I have to be up at 5 for clinical. A lot of it is probly emotianlness lol if thats a word, from being pregnant. Idk, I never got emotional with my first. Thank yall for listening.

by on Nov. 17, 2009 at 12:03 AM

I am so sorry! If you look at it this way, I am sure he was just so excited that it was really hard to keep it a secret. And that is a good thing, that he is so thrilled.

 There are two ways to live your life - one is as though nothing is a miracle, the other is as though everything is a miracle. Albert Einstein andee.jpg picture by us5dots   Join us in the Pregnancy Group,Housefullofkidz, Pregnancy Group Mod 

by on Nov. 17, 2009 at 1:32 PM

I do see your frustration. Everyone likes a little secret and he should have respected you on that. But, on the other side. He is happy and wants to share his news...would shout it to the world and that is a great thing as well. My husband was the one who didn't want people to know. Didn't want them to even know I was pregnant with this baby. That was hard too...especially once I began to show early and began to feel bad when I went around his friends thinking they might see. He still has no desire to go to dr visits or guess at its sex or anything like that.  Its a totally different scenario than what you have...but I would think you should find joy in the fact he is excited by it all. The surprise is small stuff. Let him be happy with the life you two have created and enjoy it for what it is...My opinion totally...:)

CafeMom Tickers
by on Nov. 17, 2009 at 1:36 PM

hello. i am new here but i understand your fustration. this is why i havent told anyone my babies names yet. lol. i hope all works out and if you would like to chat sometime. please feel free. :)

by on Nov. 17, 2009 at 1:42 PM

I am all about not finding out the sex before the baby is born. It really is the last true surprise. If you like the name, don't change it now. You'll just resent the reason why you are looking at names again if you do.

Here are some great things about not finding out:

-You have your little secret and nobody can find out before you.

-Ultrasounds are not 100% so you might end up with a surprise anyway.

-You originally wanted to wait and only changed your mind after he talked you into it. Now you can stick to your guns.

-When you call people after the birth, you and daddy get to announce "It's a ______ !" with enthusiasm.

-You will have gone through the most incredible experience any woman can go through, have every hormone possible running through your body, and meeting your baby for the first time. To find out the ultimate surprise at that moment only tops it off because it is a moment you and your husband will share and remember forever.

pregnant bellyJoin us in the Pregnancy Group -

sissychristi, Pregnancy Group Mod

by on Nov. 17, 2009 at 2:07 PM

Aww I know why you are upset but it also made me smile because I can see him just oh so happy and couldn't help but tell. 

I read one girl saying this already but first keep the name, you love it and you want it so keep it!! Second find out the sex and just don't tell anyone that, and that can be the surprise.


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