So I work at an appliance repair store as the office help, we also sell used appliances. It's my dad's business...anyway.
This woman comes in looking for a washer/dryer set and a range for her rental. She said the current tenants just found out they are pregnant and she feels obligated to upgrade the appliances. She then goes on about how everybody is pregnant and she is sick of young people having babies. That they are too uneducated and should wait. How she is in her 40's and from the south, so she has a right to be upset about it. What the hell? Thanks for bringing that up in front of a 22 year old that is 6 months pregnant and has a 2 1/2 year old! She notices my daughter (who comes to work with me) and quickly says she has nothing against kids, just that she has been trying for years and cant have them. It's sad that she can't, but putting me down for it isn't going to make you become pregnant. I don't know her situation and dont want to judge, because I feel so sorry for those who are unable to have children. But, if she did wait until she was in her 30's to even try...age effects fertility. She started going on about christians and how birth control needs to be used more, because it is so easy to access. Wow! I dont feel as though I am too uneducated to have my kids. I have a degree, and my husband just finished his schooling to become an EMT. We provide for our kids, feed them, cloth them, have a roof over their heads, we own 2 vehicles, and our parents pay for nothing. (well, except when they buy things for our daughter all the time like any grandparent does) We are on their cell plans, but we pay our monthly share.
Then she proceeds to go on about how so many people in their 40's that have grown kids are divorced. OK, so my parents got divorced when I was in 3rd grade...she seems to think that anyone who has kids at a young age (under 30) will get a divorce. I am not upset about this situation, I can tell she just is upset she cant have kids. But, perhaps she should watch who she is talking to before she gets on her high horse next time. Many would have snapped back at her, but I didnt. I just smiled and nodded my head. Deep down I felt sorry for her. It was just an extremely uncomfortable situation for me. She kept going on and on and on...and I kept trying to get the conversation back to the appliances. I am not sure if she ever actually noticed I was pregnant since I was behind the desk though!
-Laura
It's a girl! Cody Jean
Ignore her. Yeah, I feel sorry for people like her too, if they can't have kids. But like yous said, putting young moms down isn't going to make her pregnant. I actually had a woman tell me that it was my duty to give my son up for some loving couple to raise. I was 20, and supporting myself and my son very comfortably at the time. Just smile and ignore these people.
If she's so educated, she should have known not to wait until her pre-menopausal years to try to have children.
In general, people are having their babies later in life "nowadays," I believe...
It sounds like her personal situation is frustrating her and she is taking it out. Sorry you had to be at the end of her vent!!
That is so sad. Can you imagine how bitter she must be to actually spout off about that stuff to a stranger? As a Christian, I can personally say that sometimes Christians, just like anybody else, make unwise decisions in family planning. I am the 3rd of 6 kids raised christian and then my parents divorced after 29 years. They got married in their 20s, and yes, i think they made several bad decisions, but it has to do more with them just being selfish then when they got married.
I plan to have as many kids as i can take care of and be a good mother to. Right now that means 3, later it might mean more, or i might stop at 3. Education has nothing to do with being a good parent. You don't need a phd to raise a moral child with a strong sense selflessness and street smarts!
i think that is true. A lot of my peers (i'm 26 and pregnant with number 3) aren't even going to think about having kids until they're in their 30s and done with their career, even though they are already in stable marriages. I'd rather have the kids while my body is prime energy wise and with elastins and pursue a career later in life. You can't always put children on a timeline.
Quoting doulala:In general, people are having their babies later in life "nowadays," I believe...
It sounds like her personal situation is frustrating her and she is taking it out. Sorry you had to be at the end of her vent!!
While my first was unplanned, 22 was about when I wanted to start. So I started 2 1/2 years early... Anyway, I would rather have them younger (since I can support them financially and emotionally) and enjoy them longer! I love being a mommy and being young and able to keep up with them. I have nothing against those who wait until later at the same time. Thanks though! I did get thrown off by her christian comment, when I always thought it was catholic and mormon religions that were firm believers in not using birth control....?
I hate it when people use age as an excuse for anything! I'm 21, I have a 5 yr old, 2 yr old and a 3.5 month old. I feel I take better care of my children than some 30 year olds. I feel age has nothing to do with it though. It's each person. Just ignore her, obviously she wants children and is upset that she can't havve them when others can that dont take good care of them?
i am sorry that you were put at the end of her vent... but it was really nice of you to take it and respect her enough to not be mean... you realized that she was just probably having a bad day and decided to take it out on you because she probably looked at you and thought you were nice and would listen... but she could have not been so mean as to put down young moms. I am 24, got married when i was 20 and had my first child at 21. I am now preggo with my second child. but my cousin and my aunt are unable to have children... my aunt is more then okay that fact because she has us(her nieces and nephews) to take care of and she loves it. But my cousin on the other hand is more cynical sometimes when it comes to us girls in the family that are able to get preggo and right now it seems like she takes it out on me... i cant even complain about different things i am feeling this pregnancy (which is alot because i am more sick this pregnancy) and she takes offense and says things like i should just be blessed that i am pregnant and feeling all these pains and crap like that. i just ignore her or try and make a laugh out of it by saying something not so cynical. but just because i can get preggo and she cant doesnt mean that she has to be mean to me about it.
wow! Sounds like she unloaded all her troubles on your lap. I am so sorry she did that to you. Sounds like nothing is going how she planned so she thinks everyone deserves that. Don't let her bitterness get to you.
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Trying to find a replacement for my old caffeine habit?
- RodeoGirlUSA1
on Mar. 19, 2010 at 2:35 PM