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My sister said my birth plan is worthless....(any input is great!)

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(Yes, I know it is a bit long, I'm sorry. If you will, please read though.)

I asked yesterday about how to make a birth plan (i'm only 12 weeks but I want to know that anyone of my doctors are listening...they haven't been so far)

My sister (the one mentioned in the plan) said that it is worthless to make one and that mine is stupid and uncalled for. I was wondering if this is true? are my "demands" unreasonable or outlandish?

yes, she did hurt my feelings a bit by saying this. I still need to have the items listed approved or modified by both my doctor and the hospital but the is the rough draft. please, any input at all is great! yes, this is our first. 



Birth plan:
Labor partners: Ryan (husband) & Andrea (sister)

*if for any reason my husband cannot perform his responsibilities during or after the birth, my sister will stand in.

Labor and delivery:
1) upon arrival i do not want Pitocin to be administered. If my water has not yet broken on its own, i would like for it to happen naturally.
2) i would like to remain in my own clothing as long as possible before having to wear the hospital gown.
3) i do not want to be induced. Things may change later own but for now this is not an option for me.
4) i do not want pain meds offered to me. If needed, i will ask for options but i do not want to feel forced into it. An epidural is the last resort.
5) i do not want a c-section. I will labor for as long as i can naturally and a c-section will only be discussed if medically necessary and i must consent to it as well as my husband. (If a c-section is preformed, my wish is to keep as many of the after birth instructions as possible.)
6) i do not want an IV unless necessary. I am ok with a heplock.
7) during labor i would like to be able to eat or drink as i wish.
8) during labor i refuse to be "tied down". I want to be able to move and walk as i wish, this includes a shower or warm water bath.
9) during labor only close family is allowed in my room. During active labor only my husband and sister are allowed.
10) i would like to be able to utilize different birth positions.
11) i do not wish to use a belt monitor or internal monitor. I do not mind periodic Doppler monitoring.
12) aside from the initial exam, no internal vaginal exams until i ask.
13) i do not wish to have an episiotomy if avoidable.
14) the vacuum will not be used on my child.
15) i would like for my husband, Ryan, to "catch" the baby if at all possible.
16) no medications at all will be given to me unless i request them of i consent to them with a full explanation.

After the birth:
1) no Pitocin will be administered immediately after to expel the placenta. If there is a problem, other options will be discussed.
2) the cord will not be cut until after the placenta has been delivered and/or it has stopped pulsing and turned white. My husband will be the one to cut the cord.
3) direct skin-to-skin contact and nursing immediately after birth. This is a must. APGAR scores can be taken during nursing. Weight and such can be taken later.
4) baby does not go anywhere without je or daddy for any reason. Baby will be in my room and will not be in the nursery unless medically necessary. Baby
will not have any shots or test without our consent beforehand.
5) if baby is a boy he may be circumcised (husband and i are still discussing this actually so this one may change before than)
6) no bottle, paci's or sugar water. Baby is exclusively breast fed
7) day one of baby's life is mommy and daddy bonding time. We will update family but we do not wish to take visitors until day two. (this may change for CLOSE family)

8) I will be the one to give baby his/her first bath. This will be after nursing and bonding have taken place.

 

*I know that anything can change at any time and if an emergency should arise, most of these wishes will not be possible but these are my wishes for the birth experience I have planned and I ask that you be respectful of them and me during this time. Thank you.

by on Jun. 8, 2012 at 2:06 PM
Replies (51-60):
YzmaRocks
by Gold Member on Jun. 8, 2012 at 4:27 PM
Trail mix, granola bars, yogurt. That sort of thing. I drank water and Gatorade. Anything that will keep your energy up and you well hydrated.

Quoting lovemyhoney19:

Just curious :)

What did you eat during labor? Did you eat heavy or light? Fruits, veggies, soup? I'd like to drink and eat during mine but don't know what would be good to take to the hospital.




Quoting YzmaRocks:

What philosophy? Comfort for mom and safety for baby is now a philosophy?





It is up to the mom to decide her type of birth and it is her right to do so. I have had this very birth and it was wonderful! I wore my own clothes, ate and drank when I wanted and what I wanted and was encouraged to do so, three births and I have never even had an IV. So maybe your 'reality' needs to change.





It doesn't really matter anyway as OP has the law on her side. She can do as she pleases.






Quoting MomofNikki2010:

Ugh you are pushing YOUR philosophy which is neither law or reality







Quoting louzannalady:

Yes, it does. There is nothing ANYONE can say if a patient needs to birth naked or in her own clothes (Are they going to rip them off of her? What kind of God complex does a provider have if they can't honor this?! YIKES!). Yes, a patient has the right to eat. Yes, a patient has the right to drink. They have the right to what goes into their bodies. Yes, a patient has the right to what happens to her CHILD (be it vaxes or who bathes the baby) or where that child goes and who is with him or her. That is what is the matter with most hospitals. These things are basic human rights... Who are they to infringe on that? I am strongly alarmed you are saying that these rights are not allowed.





Quoting MomofNikki2010:

Informed consent does not mean that you can dictate things such as giving the baby a bath yourself or being able to eat, drink, stay in your own clothes, etc. It is simply in regards to medical procedures and medications.









Believe me I know the patient's bill of rights.










Quoting louzannalady:

Actually, you have it reversed. A patient's right to informed consent trumps hospital policy- EVERY time! A hospital can only legally do what a patient consents to (unless patient is unconscious and it is an emergency situation).

http://www.aimsusa.org/ppbr.htm









Quoting MomofNikki2010:

Sadly many hospitals do not follow birth plans as part of their policy and procedure. It is still good to know what you want and have your doctor know, but ultimately, policy and procedure and doctor's orders both trump your wishes.



Posted on CafeMom Mobile
YzmaRocks
by Gold Member on Jun. 8, 2012 at 4:29 PM
Kefir is good too.

Quoting lovemyhoney19:

Just curious :)

What did you eat during labor? Did you eat heavy or light? Fruits, veggies, soup? I'd like to drink and eat during mine but don't know what would be good to take to the hospital.




Quoting YzmaRocks:

What philosophy? Comfort for mom and safety for baby is now a philosophy?





It is up to the mom to decide her type of birth and it is her right to do so. I have had this very birth and it was wonderful! I wore my own clothes, ate and drank when I wanted and what I wanted and was encouraged to do so, three births and I have never even had an IV. So maybe your 'reality' needs to change.





It doesn't really matter anyway as OP has the law on her side. She can do as she pleases.






Quoting MomofNikki2010:

Ugh you are pushing YOUR philosophy which is neither law or reality







Quoting louzannalady:

Yes, it does. There is nothing ANYONE can say if a patient needs to birth naked or in her own clothes (Are they going to rip them off of her? What kind of God complex does a provider have if they can't honor this?! YIKES!). Yes, a patient has the right to eat. Yes, a patient has the right to drink. They have the right to what goes into their bodies. Yes, a patient has the right to what happens to her CHILD (be it vaxes or who bathes the baby) or where that child goes and who is with him or her. That is what is the matter with most hospitals. These things are basic human rights... Who are they to infringe on that? I am strongly alarmed you are saying that these rights are not allowed.





Quoting MomofNikki2010:

Informed consent does not mean that you can dictate things such as giving the baby a bath yourself or being able to eat, drink, stay in your own clothes, etc. It is simply in regards to medical procedures and medications.









Believe me I know the patient's bill of rights.










Quoting louzannalady:

Actually, you have it reversed. A patient's right to informed consent trumps hospital policy- EVERY time! A hospital can only legally do what a patient consents to (unless patient is unconscious and it is an emergency situation).

http://www.aimsusa.org/ppbr.htm









Quoting MomofNikki2010:

Sadly many hospitals do not follow birth plans as part of their policy and procedure. It is still good to know what you want and have your doctor know, but ultimately, policy and procedure and doctor's orders both trump your wishes.



Posted on CafeMom Mobile
lovemyhoney19
by Silver Member on Jun. 8, 2012 at 4:31 PM
Great! Thanks!

Quoting YzmaRocks:

Trail mix, granola bars, yogurt. That sort of thing. I drank water and Gatorade. Anything that will keep your energy up and you well hydrated.



Quoting lovemyhoney19:

Just curious :)


What did you eat during labor? Did you eat heavy or light? Fruits, veggies, soup? I'd like to drink and eat during mine but don't know what would be good to take to the hospital.






Quoting YzmaRocks:

What philosophy? Comfort for mom and safety for baby is now a philosophy?







It is up to the mom to decide her type of birth and it is her right to do so. I have had this very birth and it was wonderful! I wore my own clothes, ate and drank when I wanted and what I wanted and was encouraged to do so, three births and I have never even had an IV. So maybe your 'reality' needs to change.







It doesn't really matter anyway as OP has the law on her side. She can do as she pleases.








Quoting MomofNikki2010:

Ugh you are pushing YOUR philosophy which is neither law or reality









Quoting louzannalady:

Yes, it does. There is nothing ANYONE can say if a patient needs to birth naked or in her own clothes (Are they going to rip them off of her? What kind of God complex does a provider have if they can't honor this?! YIKES!). Yes, a patient has the right to eat. Yes, a patient has the right to drink. They have the right to what goes into their bodies. Yes, a patient has the right to what happens to her CHILD (be it vaxes or who bathes the baby) or where that child goes and who is with him or her. That is what is the matter with most hospitals. These things are basic human rights... Who are they to infringe on that? I am strongly alarmed you are saying that these rights are not allowed.






Quoting MomofNikki2010:

Informed consent does not mean that you can dictate things such as giving the baby a bath yourself or being able to eat, drink, stay in your own clothes, etc. It is simply in regards to medical procedures and medications.











Believe me I know the patient's bill of rights.












Quoting louzannalady:

Actually, you have it reversed. A patient's right to informed consent trumps hospital policy- EVERY time! A hospital can only legally do what a patient consents to (unless patient is unconscious and it is an emergency situation).

http://www.aimsusa.org/ppbr.htm











Quoting MomofNikki2010:

Sadly many hospitals do not follow birth plans as part of their policy and procedure. It is still good to know what you want and have your doctor know, but ultimately, policy and procedure and doctor's orders both trump your wishes.



Posted on CafeMom Mobile
eykelley
by Liz on Jun. 8, 2012 at 4:51 PM

I dont think they are out landish, but more hard to follow. Having ur DH catch the baby is gonna be hard, thats more of a home birth thing. Having him cut the cord is ok. I would just keep the things that are REALLY important. No meds, No monitoring unless necessary (chcek w/ ur hospital. come have cordless monitoring so you an walk around), showering during labor, being in different laboring positions, those are GREAT! As well as the no Vaxing w/o permission. However, most hospital are gonna want to bath the baby right away and check APGAR tests. That is usually something they can't/won't budge on. BUT... you're baby wont starve if you wait to BF till these things are done. He/she will be fine to wait to BF.

Also, if you haven't had your group B strep test done yet, you may have no say in that IV. BEcu if you DO have it (I do so i know), then they have to give you a dose of IV antibiotics as you birth the baby through the canal to avoid passing it on to baby (especially if its a girl). So, you may not have much of a say there.

Like I said... make sure the IMPORTANT things are there. Mine is detailed, but I KNOW they can do everything I said. look oer mine again on your other post and see what I put. :D

Quoting arigdon4:

you said that they would not like the things mentioned but if I am adamant, would they consent or are my request completely outlandish?

Quoting eykelley:

I work in a hospital and am delivering at one that is part of my company. I know I posted my birth plan on your post before, and yours reads a lot like mine. Most of those things, I will admit that hospital staff will be upset about. BUT you have to stand firm. I would also take that birth plan into your DR/OB at around 20w and let them know that you really do want to keep as close to that as possible.

I don't really see anything they CANT follow. I do know that there are parts they wont want to like waiting on the APGAR testing, bathing, cutting the cord, ETC. ITs just more convienient for them to do it right away becuz of how many other pts they may have. But again, just make sure you stay strong. My Birthing plan is also VERY strict. But, I am having a Csec and we are a non-vax family so, I have to be strict.

Good luck and I would def make sure this is posted in your chart at ur doctors office and on your L&D door!! That way it is obviously stated!

 




Mrs.Andrews
by Mandy on Jun. 8, 2012 at 5:20 PM
4 moms liked this

If you want doctors to take a birth plan seriously, you have to keep it short and to the point. Use your plan to inform the staff of situations where you are going against the normal hospital birthing model. Or where you may be unable to tell them what you are wanting. So extra things like no pitocin when you first get there, first bath, details of visiting, circumcision, induction, clothing, etc, aren't really nessesary. You will be able to tell them those wishes at the time that it becomes important. 


This is how I would redo your plan:

Birth plan for your name here

Due date:

Dr. your doctors name here
Only my Husband and Sister will be allowed in the labor and delivery room

Labor and delivery:
1) No not offer me pain medication. I will ask for it if I feel I need it.

2) I do not want an IV, my doctor has approved a heplock

3) I will be eating and drinking during labor

4) I only want to be on the monitors as minimally as possible, I will be moving around, showering, and using the labor tub during labor.

5) I do not want to push on my back. Please help me to use other positions to labor and push.

6) Please use the doppler to monitor my baby whenever possible instead of the belt monitor. 

7) I do not want an internal monitor unless absolutely nessesary and baby is showing signs of distress

8) No vaginal exams unless I request them

9) Do NOT give me an episiotomy without my permission and only after using different positions for pushing if baby appears to be stuck.

10) Do not use vacuum or forceps 

11) My Husband will catch the baby

12) No medications at all will be given to me unless i request them or i consent to them with a full explanation.

After birth:

After the birth:
1) no Pitocin will be administered immediately after to expel the placenta. If there is a problem, other options will be discussed.

2) Do not clamp the cord until after the placenta has been delivered and/or it has stopped pulsing and turned white. My husband will be the one to cut the cord.

3) Baby is to be placed directly on my chest after delivery. The initial exam can be performed there.

4) baby does not go anywhere without je or daddy for any reason. Baby will be in my room and will not be in the nursery unless medically necessary. Baby will not have any shots or test without our consent beforehand.

5) No bottle, paci's or sugar water. Baby is exclusively breast fed.

6) No visitors will be allowed for the first day after birth. Please post a sign on my door and keep hospital staff to a minimum. 

 I do not want a c-section. I will labor for as long as i can naturally and a c-section will only be discussed if medically necessary and i must consent to it as well as my husband. (If a c-section is preformed, my wish is to keep as many of the after birth instructions as possible.)

*I know that anything can change at any time and if an emergency should arise, most of these wishes will not be possible but these are my wishes for the birth experience I have planned and I ask that you be respectful of them and me during this time. Thank you.

msswisher08
by on Jun. 8, 2012 at 7:47 PM
The doctor can refuse to deliver the baby of patient doesnt go thru their process. It happens here all the time.


Quoting louzannalady:

It isn't a philosophy. It is fact. I am really, really sorry that you don't feel women have rights over what happens to their body or baby once they enter the hospital. That is really scary. 


Quoting MomofNikki2010:

Ugh you are pushing YOUR philosophy which is neither law or reality



Quoting louzannalady:

Yes, it does. There is nothing ANYONE can say if a patient needs to birth naked or in her own clothes (Are they going to rip them off of her? What kind of God complex does a provider have if they can't honor this?! YIKES!). Yes, a patient has the right to eat. Yes, a patient has the right to drink. They have the right to what goes into their bodies. Yes, a patient has the right to what happens to her CHILD (be it vaxes or who bathes the baby) or where that child goes and who is with him or her. That is what is the matter with most hospitals. These things are basic human rights... Who are they to infringe on that? I am strongly alarmed you are saying that these rights are not allowed.



Quoting MomofNikki2010:

Informed consent does not mean that you can dictate things such as giving the baby a bath yourself or being able to eat, drink, stay in your own clothes, etc. It is simply in regards to medical procedures and medications.





Believe me I know the patient's bill of rights.






Quoting louzannalady:

Actually, you have it reversed. A patient's right to informed consent trumps hospital policy- EVERY time! A hospital can only legally do what a patient consents to (unless patient is unconscious and it is an emergency situation).

http://www.aimsusa.org/ppbr.htm





Quoting MomofNikki2010:

Sadly many hospitals do not follow birth plans as part of their policy and procedure. It is still good to know what you want and have your doctor know, but ultimately, policy and procedure and doctor's orders both trump your wishes.





Posted on CafeMom Mobile
princessamber
by Bronze Member on Jun. 8, 2012 at 7:56 PM
If you want this all to happen a homr birth or a birthing center are about your only options hospital staff will not go by this unless u have a midwife to stop them from it or stop them from pushing you into stuff
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
louzannalady
by on Jun. 8, 2012 at 8:32 PM
1 mom liked this

By law, a doctor cannot refuse to treat a woman who walks into the hospital in labor. Especially, if she is already his patient. He would have to give her a thirty day notice and a referral to another provider- otherwise it is considered patient abandonment. Now, I am not saying doctors don't tell patients that. I am not saying that patients don't fall for that. But, a woman has the legal right to medical help AND has the right to say what happens to her body during that time. Oh and here are the ACOG guidelines on informed consent. Any doctor who refuses to treat a patient who understands and exercises that right is going against these guidelines. 

http://www.acog.org/Resources_And_Publications/Committee_Opinions/Committee_on_Ethics/Informed_Consent

Quoting msswisher08:

The doctor can refuse to deliver the baby of patient doesnt go thru their process. It happens here all the time.


Quoting louzannalady:

It isn't a philosophy. It is fact. I am really, really sorry that you don't feel women have rights over what happens to their body or baby once they enter the hospital. That is really scary. 


Quoting MomofNikki2010:

Ugh you are pushing YOUR philosophy which is neither law or reality



Quoting louzannalady:

Yes, it does. There is nothing ANYONE can say if a patient needs to birth naked or in her own clothes (Are they going to rip them off of her? What kind of God complex does a provider have if they can't honor this?! YIKES!). Yes, a patient has the right to eat. Yes, a patient has the right to drink. They have the right to what goes into their bodies. Yes, a patient has the right to what happens to her CHILD (be it vaxes or who bathes the baby) or where that child goes and who is with him or her. That is what is the matter with most hospitals. These things are basic human rights... Who are they to infringe on that? I am strongly alarmed you are saying that these rights are not allowed.



Quoting MomofNikki2010:

Informed consent does not mean that you can dictate things such as giving the baby a bath yourself or being able to eat, drink, stay in your own clothes, etc. It is simply in regards to medical procedures and medications.





Believe me I know the patient's bill of rights.






Quoting louzannalady:

Actually, you have it reversed. A patient's right to informed consent trumps hospital policy- EVERY time! A hospital can only legally do what a patient consents to (unless patient is unconscious and it is an emergency situation).

http://www.aimsusa.org/ppbr.htm





Quoting MomofNikki2010:

Sadly many hospitals do not follow birth plans as part of their policy and procedure. It is still good to know what you want and have your doctor know, but ultimately, policy and procedure and doctor's orders both trump your wishes.






Lilypie Second Birthday tickers

kris0921
by on Jun. 8, 2012 at 8:54 PM

I would give a copy to your Dr, and keep a few copies with you so you can have them to hand out to nurses at the hospital. And hang a copy in your room so they know.

NCJen84
by Member on Jun. 8, 2012 at 9:35 PM

Call her back and ask for a copy of their policies. I know the eating and drinking will not fly in 90% of hospitals. Also the APGAR can be done on your chest. See if the nurse at l&d can meet with you she would know better than ANY of your Dr's what they do and do not allow. Also find out about how they allow you to labor, are there any restrictions.

Then talk to you Dr about inductions, when and why they do them? Do they allow you to go past your due date? If so, how long?

As far as visitors you need to let family know not to come until you call. The hospital I delivered my older 3 at called you at every visitor, I switched to a better hospital and as long as visitors showed an ID they were allowed in between 10a-12n and 2p-7p.

Ask for a lactation consultant as soon as possible to make sure you have proper latch. Find out what the hospitals policy of the pedi seeing the baby is. Some go to the room, some take them to the nursery.

I would reword the "tied down" one to someething along the lines of. I would like to walk freely, shower, and make good use of the birthing tub as I wish.

I am pregnant with my 5th. In my opinion birth plans are useless because they ask you just about every question when you admitted. My midwife goes over it at every appt after 32 weeks. I have one just incase every time but I have found I haven't needed them. By no means am I trying to hurt your feelings just giving my advice. One I will be adding in to mine is...One nurse may stick me twice attempting the IV after that someone else must be called and it must be in a location that I approve. With my last the nurse stuck me 5 times before my mom reminded her it was against the hospitals policy to stick me more than 2 times. That nurse was a B*TCH.

Quoting arigdon4:

he hospitals head nurse of l&d is the one who told me to make the birth plan...

Quoting DamiensMommy1:

Talk to your Dr and a l&d nurse at your local hospital. There are gonna be some things they can't do but it doesn't sound more extreme than some birth plans I've seen



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