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Pregnancy Pregnancy

Test results and reactions by medical profession :(

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A little bit of basic information... I am due to have baby number 5 in december and the pregnancy was a complete suprise and unplanned... I am 42 so am immediatly classed as 'high risk' anyway because of my age alone...

I had a hospital appointment on Tuesday, and the Midwife left me feeling guilty, upset, scared and very angry... I have a 1 in 11 chance of having a child with Down syndrome because the blood test came back positive.. The ultrasound was excellent and the fluid behind the neck was the right amount, so there is no definant diagnoses at the moment...

I was treated as if there has been a diagnosis and was told by the Midwife, to have an amniosentisies, and to terminate... She didnt even say 'if the amnio results come back for DS to terminate'...That i have 4 healthy children already and that given that i am 42, what happens when i am no longer here... She never asked me what i had planned to do, or what my thoughts were, she told me what i should do... Nor did she ask me what my hubby wanted me to do, or his thoughts either...

Hubby and i have decided that we are not going to have a amnio because of the risks, and that we will love our baby regardless... That we are leaving this in Gods hands and will work together and face whatever comes our way...

Medical professionals need to be more aware of how they approach telling a mother they are 'high risk' and give some hope, rather than making a desicion for them based on a blood test result,  even before there is an exact diagnosis...

 

CafeMom Tickers
by on Jun. 14, 2012 at 1:14 AM
Replies (681-690):
lisafamily
by on Jun. 18, 2012 at 12:51 PM

(((hugs))) I support your decision of skipping amniocentesis and leaving this in God's hands. All babies are miracles and The Lord does not make mistakes.

Lindabethy
by on Jun. 19, 2012 at 2:31 AM
Our second child was diagnosed as having a Dandy-Walker cyst, a narrowing of the passages of fluid that cushion the brain. Instead of the long planned cross country move from Massachusetts to California, I had to take my son and fly across country; we were told the trip might make things worse. When my husband arrived we were seen by the pediatric "team" that would bring our child into this world. The two doctors, from UC San Diego's high risk group flat out told us to abort my baby. We were told that he would never be able to read or write, and would probably have a "low quality of life." My husband and I had already decided to let God be the one who decided who should live and who should die. After two week's in the neo-natal intensive care unit we brought Michael home. Every week for a year, and then once a month for another year we lived in fear that we would need to let the doctor's operate on Michael, inserting a "shunt" into his head to drain the "excess" fluid that the brain produced. FINALLY, after all the trauma, at the end of two years of fears, tears, and prayers, we were told that they (the doctors) had decided Michael just had a little bit bigger head then "normal." Today my son is doing very well! His IQ was a LOT higher than the "experts" ever dreamed it would be - 154!! Thank God we listened to our faith and rejected their call to "terminate" my precious little boy.
garciaimhof
by on Jun. 19, 2012 at 2:52 AM

A colombian friend's friend was living in the US and had a similiar diagnosis (not sure based on what); as the doctors were not really sure and also said she should terminate her pregnancy, she decided to come back to Colombia and had a perfectly normal kid. Apparently the doctors over there prefer to suggest an abortion rather than facing a lawsuit, but in Colombia nobody sues anybody, so they don't even consider that risk.

TinkFL
by on Jun. 19, 2012 at 8:26 PM

I would definitely find another midwife. Medical "PROFESSIONALS" are paid to give their opinions based on medical evidence - not on personal feelings. If there is a governing board in your state - licensing board or the like, and I'm sure there is - for midwives, I would report your experience to them. If there is truly no other evidence supporting the likelihood of Down's Syndrome outside of the blood test - which, by the way, is only an indicator of an increased CHANCE of your baby having DS, it is by no means conclusive - and you are not putting your own safety at risk by continuing the pregnancy, she has no business teilling you to terminate your pregnancy!!! My perinatologist, by comparison, was very compassionate when asking if I was going to have an amnio (I too, was high risk, for age and health problems). He told me that an amnio is ONLY important if I WOULD consider terminating should there be a problem or deformity of somekind. As long as I planned to have my child regardless of any problems, I didn't need the amnio, but could have one if I wanted to for some other reason.

Your midwife really needs to attend one of Dale Carnegie's "How to Win Friends and Influence People" seminars!!

cutpiesmommy
by on Jun. 21, 2012 at 1:32 PM

 So sorry you have to experience this kind of attitude. Hope people would change their thinking for "OTHERS". I would take it to member services and file a complaint against this midwife. When I was pregnant with my first I have to do amnio as I had 1 out of 10 chances to have DS kid. You know what now we are blessed with a Beautiful and Charming 3 years and 8 months old Handsome little man running around our house and making mom and dad to dance for his tunes.

LOL!

 

Hope you feel alright!

 

Have a Blessed Rest of the Pregnancy.

CarolynC71
by on Jun. 21, 2012 at 2:10 PM

I would be getting me a new midwife or better yet a doctor. That is unprofessional for her to give you unsolicited medical advice.

flowersmama
by on Jun. 22, 2012 at 8:26 PM

i would find a new midwife if it were me. im glad to hear you guys are gonna keep your baby!

screamykittycat
by on Jun. 22, 2012 at 8:38 PM
I love lamp.
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Emmysmom6886
by on Jun. 24, 2012 at 4:56 PM

I'm sorry that is awful.  I would definitely switch midwifes.  If this was through a hospital, you might want to talk to a patient advocate and discuss how the situation was handled.  Sometimes this can prevent someone else going through the misery you have suffered.  Wishing you well with the rest of your pregnancy.

cali_angel_girl
by Amy on Jun. 24, 2012 at 5:20 PM

Wow hun I am sorry you got treated that way ((hugs)) I hope your able to switch midwifes because you deserve to be treated better then that.

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