Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Pregnancy Pregnancy

What do you do if you're ready for a baby but SO is not?

Posted by on Jun. 28, 2012 at 11:11 PM
  • 7 Replies

In my relationship, my husband was actually ready to start a family a few years before I was, but I'd love to hear from those of you in the opposite boat.

What do you do if you're ready for a baby but SO is not?  

Your stories could help other moms in a similar situation.

We might feature some of your responses in our new Advice section!

Thank you for your help!

by on Jun. 28, 2012 at 11:11 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-7):
schultzal
by Bronze Member on Jun. 29, 2012 at 4:00 AM

I wait. I would not want to bring a baby into a relationship that is not prepared for it. Not to mention the damage it can do to a relationship to have a child when one partner is against it, at the time...

BellaLove27
by on Jun. 29, 2012 at 9:13 AM

 Before trying for DS1, DH was not ready for baby and I was. I just had to be patient and wait until he was ready..lucky for me it was only a few months, we were out for dinner and there was a big family with lots of kids, and DH said, OK I'm ready for baby lol.

pregnancy week by week


anxiousschk
by Silver Member on Jun. 29, 2012 at 9:19 AM

You wait.  You can talk about it and talk through it, but you wait.  That's really the only option. 

meam4444
by Emerald Member on Jun. 29, 2012 at 10:26 AM

It is all about communication and patience.  My husband and I are both very open on where we are with family planning, and eventually, we are able to decide what is best for our little family.

PEEK05
by on Jun. 29, 2012 at 10:36 AM

There's nothing you can do but wait. You cannot and should not force a baby upon someone. You can always have babies later down the road but you cannot ever take away a baby.

Cafe Naomi
by Head Admin on Jun. 29, 2012 at 10:52 AM

Thanks for the great responses so far!  It's interesting reading this persepctive.  I remember with us, DH was patient but a part of me felt badly for not feeling ready.  Mostly I was worried I'd never know if I was ready.  And then one day, it just came upon me LOL and from that moment on, a baby was all I could think about :-)

louzannalady
by Gold Member on Jun. 29, 2012 at 11:14 AM

Depends on some factors. If you are married, you guys should have honestly had this conversation before hand, so you knew you were marrying a person with the same values and going the same direction as you.... It really is something you guys would have to talk about and just work through. If you are dating, it's simple: break up and find someone who is on the same page is you and is ready to take this very important step. It is paramount, that you do NOT create a child with someone who is not ready!!!! They will either run for the hills, be completely miserable and resent you and/or said child or (slight chance) grow a pair and become a great father. The odds are highest in camps one and two.... This is not a decision one person can make on their own, it changes your whole life and to change a person's whole life in this way without them being ready for that change is wrong (I am talking about those that "forget" to take their birth control, or poke holes in condoms, or lie outright about their method of contraception). 

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)