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How to be a good little girl, per the hospital. I'm not a good girl. *** UPDATE

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UPDATED INFO FOR THOSE WHO HAVE MISREAD **** I never said I know more than my doctor.

I EXPECT informed consent to be a requirement before any procedure, just like any other thing you go to the hospital for. They tell you the options the ones they like, the ones they don't like, risks and benefits and I get to choose. THEY EDUCATE, I CHOOSE.

If anyone wants to go on faith and blindly accept anything they want, that is fine I won't stop you. That is your business. You get your choices, I get mine.

I might wear the stupid hospital gown, but I don't want to be bullied into it. I don't know what I will feel most comfortable in, until I get there. But it is really funny that some think  that bulling is ok in the hospital, but not in school's?

My dr wanted me to go in today to L&D to get an NST because he thinks I am 42 weeks, I think that I am 39 weeks. Late ultrasounds vs LMP. Did NST Thursday, Tues, Thursday, today on Sunday, and then have appt to go back on Tuesday. So we have done this for a while. I don't think they are really needed, I am just going along with some of his wishes. I have told him NO on induction. Just keeping the peace really going along with the NST's.

While at the hospital they give me a pamphlet on how to be a good patient.

Admission. Upon arrival to the childbirth suite you will be INSTRUCTED to change into a hospital gown ... A vaginal exam will be done to see if your cervix is ready for the baby to come.
It says not to worry we are assessing your baby continuously. IE STAY IN BED WITH THE NST MONITORS ON AT ALL TIMES.

You are staying to deliver your baby. IV fluids WILL BE STARTED in your hand or arm. This will help in the prevention of dehydration and/or low blood sugar.

Can I eat or drink? While you are in active labor most physicians WILL ONLY ALLOW clear liquids and ice.

Vaginal Delivery. When your cervix if fully dilated you WILL BE INSTRUCTED to start pushing....If the baby appears healthy and is breathing well, he may be placed on your stomach.

I was asked if I had any instructions for the nursery. I said I didn't plan on my child going to the nursery. THE BABY CAN'T BE IN YOUR ROOM UNLESS SOMEONE IS AWAKE is what I was told. Hubby said I will be here and be awake if she isn't.

I think me being comfortable, wearing what I want because I am not sick, being able to move is going to do more to progress my labor than you hooking me to a useless machine for the duration. Laying on my back in pain not moving isn't going to fly. You might get 20 mins. Might. I sure am not allowing you to start a non medically needed IV, I am giving birth I am not SICK. I will prevent dehydration and low blood sugar the old fashioned way. And I am pretty sure I will know when I need to push. Why do you believe that my cervix is just yours to grope as you please? I mean really the baby is going to come regardless if you check or not. PS you have no rights over my child and where he will be. He needs to come to me immediately. You don't get to tell me how soon I can see him or when I get to have him in my room. He is MINE. He will be with a parent at all times. (he has an umbilical cord and if anything is wrong, you need to leave it intact to allow you time to work on him vs detaching him from his built in life support)

It is silly in this day and age that hospitals think they get to dictate your birth. They use words to make it sound like you have no options. I didn't bother addressing any of this today. No need to start issues early. But Hubby is like wait a min who do they think they are. You can ask, you can suggest, you don't get to demand. Too bad home births are not legal in my state. But after today, Hubby FULLY understands why you would not want to get to the hospital early.

by on Oct. 7, 2012 at 4:15 PM
Replies (571-580):
by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 12:23 PM
1 mom liked this

We have a big issue when less women die in child birth in KUWAIT or BOSNIA or SERBIA than the United States! So, clearly having a birth attended by a doctor who went to medical school in the United States does not mean you will have the safest outcome automatically! We have to fix this by being better informed of our options! We need to ask questions, like th OP is doing.

Quoting supercarp:

Where did you go to medical school?

by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 12:30 PM

You forgot the Miz Scarlet! : ) 

Quoting gumeshoe:

Honestly it is true. I knew nothing bout birthing babies

Quoting :
I have cried reading this! I have been AMAZED at all the information you have shared with the women here and how well you have handled yourself in this post! :  ) You have really, really made my day- heck my WHOLE MONTH- with this response! I can't believe I was put in the same sentence as Doulala! Is my mentor, I have learned so much about love and tolerance from her! : ) Thank you for this! : *)

by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 12:39 PM

You are proud of doing what you were told? Those are things that have lead to the horrible state we are in with the maternal death rate in this country. Do you realize LESS women die in Kuwait, Bosnia or Serbia, as examples? Pushing while laying a the back, routine episiotomies, inductions without medical reason, and policies where low-risk women cannot eat or drink and babies are placed on mom's chest immediately are not evidence-based and studies show they do more harm than good.

Quoting supercarp:

Some women just want to make a big deal out of everything, probably out of a need to be noticed. I had 3 children, did what I was told went home. I witnessed others being a pain in the neck. I have worked in a hospital and seen stupid women threatening to pull out their i.v.'s giving the nurses a hard time and in general making everyone else miserable.  

by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 4:20 PM

That sucks!  What state do you live in?  I live in upstate NY.  My delivery suite had a private shower which I stood in for quite some time to help with pain.  Part of the time I was totally naked because that was more comfortable for me (nothing restricting).  I was allowed and even encouraged to get up and move around.  I don't think I laid in bed until it was actually time to push.  I had to have IV antibiotics because I tested positive for that bacteria that lives in the vagina (harmless to me, but not the baby) and as soon as it was done it was taken off.  I was not forced to have IV fluids.  I was allowed water/ice and I think juice.  When my son was born we got to hold him for quite some time before they took him to clean him up/measure/whatever and they brought him back as soon as possible.  They encouraged breast feeding and having him sleep right in your room if that was what you wanted.  Even if we were both sleeping.  What do they think when you go home someone will be awake 24/7 to watch over the baby?  They say if the baby sleeps, you should try to sleep.  I was very happy with our hospital, I had the same midwife deliver both my son and daughter.  I'm sorry you had such a crappy time.  It's supposed to be a wonderful experience.  It sounds like they are making child birth an illness, but like you said, you're not sick. It's really too bad. 

by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 9:42 PM
1 mom liked this
You really find that incredible? Yikes. It's sad when women don't know and don't trust their bodies to do what nature intended them to do. The medical community didn't create the birth process and they have done little to nothing to improve it.
Quoting supercarp:

The reason they put an i.v. in when you get to the hospital is because if you hemmorhage, there may not be time to get an i.v. started before you die. I have witnessed a lot of difficulty getting i.v.'s started. Don't assume your child's birth will go smoothly, even if you've had prior children. Things sometimes go wrong. It's incredible that so many babies are born without problems, considering everything that could go wrong.

by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 10:55 PM

That's the same reason why I didn't pick apart your reply. It would take too much effort =)

Quoting jaylonsmommy26:

Yeah, I decided you really were not worth the effort it took to respond :)

Quoting Sharkgirl7:

is there a reason why you quoted me but then didn't reply??

Quoting jaylonsmommy26:

Quoting Sharkgirl7:

I'm sorry that you are uneducated on this issue =(

Quoting jaylonsmommy26:

They have a reason for doing things  that way. That have been to school for years for this, they know what they are doing. It may seem they are being pushy, but every step they take is a protective measure for your child. If you can't trust them, you need to find another hospital or you will have a miserable birth.

by on Oct. 13, 2012 at 5:33 PM

It is silly that you keep trying to twist facts to suit your own agenda, nice that you are finally admiting it. Many people have said we are the bottom of the stack in maternal mortality in industialized countries. You want to add 3rd world counties to the list to make the US look better.

Why don't you compare the diets of starving children in some 3rd world country to diets of US children. Make it look like kids diets here are wonderful. Any campaign to try to get kids to eat healthier in the is just RIDICULOUS.

An to address your many unrelated tangents, I can pee standing up. No one mentioned vegans. No one here has said anything about giving birth without the aid of doctors or midwives. No midwife had her client squat in the bushes "back in the day".

by Member on Oct. 23, 2012 at 2:29 PM

I read this post a few weeks ago and couldn't get it out of my mind. First of all I sort of agree with you. I hated I couldn't leave my bed (even to use the bathroom). I was stuck in bed from Wednesday at 9pm to Saturday at 9pm. I didn't even get to shower or eat during that time. But I had Preeclampsia and some of the meds I was put on made me shakey. All these rules were for MINE and MY babys safety. Was it overkill - yes/maybe in my opinion. But the hospital and doctors were only concerned about my health.The hospital has done many births and these rules where created based on experience. Annoying or not they are for your benefit. Trust I was cranky the whole time, but I understood.

As far as the hospital gown - seriously??? How is that an issue for you. Trust me NO one cares what you are wearing and you will not once active labor comes. You will be bleeding, leaking pee and poop and the baby comes out all gooey and you will not want to miss them placing him/her on your chest for the first time. It's not a fashion show and the gown  comes of easily in an emergency. You don't want them spending time cutting you out of clothes if an emergency happens. I don't think anyone is bullying you into anything. You have the right to refuse medical treatment or advise. If you don't want to be stuck to the  bed refuse.

Once it's all over you will be embrassed you throw such a fit over stupid stuff - after all getting your baby here safely is all everyone wants. If you still can't be comfortable with doing and the hospitals precaucations than I suggest a home birth.

by on Oct. 23, 2012 at 3:09 PM

That's why I stayed home in I wasn't sure if it was REALLY it and after 2 bad hospital experiences out of 3---I was waiting as long as I could

by on Oct. 25, 2012 at 7:42 AM
Unfortunately underground midwives can scam you out of a postive home birth friend had a horrible experience with hers she tore durning the birth and bled so much the mw gave her some pill said shed be fine and left her to bleed with no instructions. She passed out and her husband called 911. She still has issues from tearing and her son is 2 yrs old. The mw never followed up with her & when she tried to reach her she was unable too. It sucks that they have to use underground mw's here.

Quoting AtiFreeFalls:

Just FYI, home birth is legal in all 50 states, home birth midwifery is not. You can choose to have a home birth without an attendant or with an underground midwife or a naturopathic doctor (or otherlegal birth attendant, there are legal attendants in all 50 states as well, just harder to find).

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