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Pregnancy Pregnancy

Leaving for army

Posted by on Nov. 21, 2012 at 5:48 PM
  • 11 Replies
I'm due in April and hubby is talking about joining the army, he says he'll leave when baby girl is about 2 years old.. I don't want to keep him from something he wants to do, and he says its good for our family ?
Not too informed, but I know baby girl and I would really miss him..
What would you think ?
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by on Nov. 21, 2012 at 5:48 PM
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Replies (1-10):
doulala
by Emerald Member on Nov. 21, 2012 at 6:50 PM


This is a really big deal.    Not the right choice for my family--   but it is for some.

But imo, it should be a decision you BOTH feel is "good for your family" (not just him telling you that it is)... 

How do you feel about this?

Wantn1more
by Bronze Member on Nov. 21, 2012 at 6:58 PM
1 mom liked this
This is a really great thing your husband is talking about doing. It can also have great benefits for your family. Of course being separated is hard, but it is managable.
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Messicax
by on Nov. 21, 2012 at 6:59 PM
I would really miss him and wouldn't want him missing out on his first child, but I also wouldn't tell him straight up NO.
Whatever makes him happy in life, whatever he wants to experience and if our family could really benefit from it, maybe I could see it as good and be proud of him as well.


Quoting doulala:


This is a really big deal.    Not the right choice for my family--   but it is for some.

But imo, it should be a decision you BOTH feel is "good for your family" (not just him telling you that it is)... 

How do you feel about this?

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boshs1andonly
by on Nov. 21, 2012 at 7:03 PM
1 mom liked this

Being an army wife can be a rough life. My twin sister is going through it, her dh missed both births of their children (I was the one to take her to appointments and be there for delivery) and didn't meet them until they were 4 months old. They have been married almost 6 years, and he's been gone for most of that (2 deployments and one overseas tour). Granted it doesn't work out that way for everyone but still deployments are just one part of the lifestyle. I considered joining the air force a few years ago, but changed my mind. Now that I have dd I'm glad I didn't do it, I couldn't be away from her that much. That's not to say I'm ungrateful, or look down on those that do. It just wouldn't have been the right choice for our family. As pp said, make sure you talk it over and that you both feel that it's the right choice, otherwise you might just end up resenting him. 

doulala
by Emerald Member on Nov. 21, 2012 at 7:04 PM

You feel comfortable being on your own?--  or would you be well-supported without him?

I think "telling him straight up no" is the same thing as him telling you he is going--  without a conversation to decide together.

Quoting Messicax:

I would really miss him and wouldn't want him missing out on his first child, but I also wouldn't tell him straight up NO.
Whatever makes him happy in life, whatever he wants to experience and if our family could really benefit from it, maybe I could see it as good and be proud of him as well.


Quoting doulala:


This is a really big deal.    Not the right choice for my family--   but it is for some.

But imo, it should be a decision you BOTH feel is "good for your family" (not just him telling you that it is)... 

How do you feel about this?


Wantn1more
by Bronze Member on Nov. 21, 2012 at 7:13 PM
As an army wife you are never on your own.... There is a life style or type of comradary here that an outsider wouldn't understand. Yes this is a sacrifice, on both accounts, but it comes with great reward.

Quoting doulala:

You feel comfortable being on your own?--  or would you be well-supported without him?

I think "telling him straight up no" is the same thing as him telling you he is going--  without a conversation to decide together.

Quoting Messicax:

I would really miss him and wouldn't want him missing out on his first child, but I also wouldn't tell him straight up NO.

Whatever makes him happy in life, whatever he wants to experience and if our family could really benefit from it, maybe I could see it as good and be proud of him as well.




Quoting doulala:


This is a really big deal.    Not the right choice for my family--   but it is for some.

But imo, it should be a decision you BOTH feel is "good for your family" (not just him telling you that it is)... 

How do you feel about this?


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TIffanyB84
by on Nov. 21, 2012 at 7:15 PM
1 mom liked this
Mine is talking about army to! I gave him a choice me or army!! I cant do the army thing lost way to many ppl including my bro in august
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Tasha0802
by on Nov. 21, 2012 at 7:22 PM
1 mom liked this

this (below)... My husband just retired from the army and I miss it. It depends on the MOS and sometimes just luck as to how many times you deploy. My husband was in for 4 years and he only went to Haiti for 4 months. Others deploy alot more. It just depends. but I will say that I really miss the army lifestyle. Housing is paid, no utilities, free pool (certain posts), free lawn maintenence, free gym, and not to mention great friends. Most of the army wives look out for each other. It can be rough but can be very rewarding as well. You just have to discuss if it's right for you. Good Luck!

Quoting Wantn1more:

As an army wife you are never on your own.... There is a life style or type of comradary here that an outsider wouldn't understand. Yes this is a sacrifice, on both accounts, but it comes with great reward.

Quoting doulala:

You feel comfortable being on your own?--  or would you be well-supported without him?

I think "telling him straight up no" is the same thing as him telling you he is going--  without a conversation to decide together.

Quoting Messicax:

I would really miss him and wouldn't want him missing out on his first child, but I also wouldn't tell him straight up NO.

Whatever makes him happy in life, whatever he wants to experience and if our family could really benefit from it, maybe I could see it as good and be proud of him as well.




Quoting doulala:


This is a really big deal.    Not the right choice for my family--   but it is for some.

But imo, it should be a decision you BOTH feel is "good for your family" (not just him telling you that it is)... 

How do you feel about this?



Tasha, wife to David: 11/23/09;

Mommy to Braelyn: 3/30/08, Natalie(our angel baby) 8/2/10, Kaleb: 8/15/11, & #4 Due July 2013

groombridetoddler girltoddler boystork







Wantn1more
by Bronze Member on Nov. 21, 2012 at 7:26 PM
My husband has 14 years in.... Infantry... With 4 oconus deployments. We're all one big family that can count on one another.

Quoting Tasha0802:

this (below)... My husband just retired from the army and I miss it. It depends on the MOS and sometimes just luck as to how many times you deploy. My husband was in for 4 years and he only went to Haiti for 4 months. Others deploy alot more. It just depends. but I will say that I really miss the army lifestyle. Housing is paid, no utilities, free pool (certain posts), free lawn maintenence, free gym, and not to mention great friends. Most of the army wives look out for each other. It can be rough but can be very rewarding as well. You just have to discuss if it's right for you. Good Luck!

Quoting Wantn1more:

As an army wife you are never on your own.... There is a life style or type of comradary here that an outsider wouldn't understand. Yes this is a sacrifice, on both accounts, but it comes with great reward.



Quoting doulala:

You feel comfortable being on your own?--  or would you be well-supported without him?

I think "telling him straight up no" is the same thing as him telling you he is going--  without a conversation to decide together.

Quoting Messicax:

I would really miss him and wouldn't want him missing out on his first child, but I also wouldn't tell him straight up NO.


Whatever makes him happy in life, whatever he wants to experience and if our family could really benefit from it, maybe I could see it as good and be proud of him as well.






Quoting doulala:


This is a really big deal.    Not the right choice for my family--   but it is for some.

But imo, it should be a decision you BOTH feel is "good for your family" (not just him telling you that it is)... 

How do you feel about this?



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Messicax
by on Nov. 21, 2012 at 7:29 PM
It's definitely a big deal and something to talk about deeply together, I suppose it all depends on a family's situation and feeling towards this sort of decision. Very, very big deal for sure !!
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