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not into it..

Posted by on Jan. 25, 2013 at 1:10 PM
  • 13 Replies
I havent been wanting to have sex with my SO. I am 12 weeks and already have 2 kids with him. Hes become very angry with me and I sont know what to do. Anyone else experiwnce this and what can I do?
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by on Jan. 25, 2013 at 1:10 PM
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Replies (1-10):
GoddessNDaRuff
by on Jan. 25, 2013 at 1:13 PM
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Our sex life has pretty much stopped. I'm 23 weeks now. He's irritated but understands I just don't want it. It HURTS!!!!!!!!

Tell him that it's a side effect of pregnancy and he'll have to suck it up and jack off. You are the one going through everything, lack of sex won't freaking kill him.

JadeTigr7
by on Jan. 25, 2013 at 1:18 PM

I think it's ridiculous that he's angry with you for something that is normal, especially in the beginning of pregnancy.  You may get your sex drive back when you're more into the 2nd trimester or you may not get it back until after you have the baby.  

I've never dealt with anything like that though, my husband has always been very supportive. 

mem82
by Ruby Member on Jan. 25, 2013 at 1:24 PM
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I agree. Rob wouldn't get angry over something like that. LOL Maybe a little pouty but nothing serious. We'd probably laugh about it.

Quoting JadeTigr7:

I think it's ridiculous that he's angry with you for something that is normal, especially in the beginning of pregnancy.  You may get your sex drive back when you're more into the 2nd trimester or you may not get it back until after you have the baby.  

I've never dealt with anything like that though, my husband has always been very supportive. 


1stTimeMom2bATL
by Member on Jan. 25, 2013 at 1:25 PM
I have been the same way throughout this pregnancy so I understand where you're coming from. It is important that you communicate your feelings to him. A man has needs. I'm not suggesting that you do something you don't want to do but there are other ways to "please" him and keep him happy.
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annhart19
by Member on Jan. 25, 2013 at 1:26 PM
Yes I am the same way right now. I usually give in about once a week it's to keep him happy cuz I know it must be rough. But it's just the hormones and hopefully will get back to normal soon
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Amycapl
by on Jan. 25, 2013 at 2:00 PM

i am in exactly the same situation!  totally not interested in sex but i know it will cause friction in our marriage if the sex stops completely. I try to get into once a week. It's not always easy, and i'm totally not advocating that you do ANYTHING that  you're not comfortable doing!  if/when you DO have sex, is it enjoyable for you?  in my case, i'm never in the mood, but once it's actually happening, i enjoy it.  I also feel like it's a vicious cycle: you don't really want to, he gets mad which makes you unhappy which in turn makes you want it even less.....  try connecting on other levels more frequently.  hold hands, kiss, hug. touch a lot. maybe do something new and fun together to get that excitement pumping :)  good luck!

avaana06
by on Jan. 25, 2013 at 2:04 PM

Yes, this is happening with us too. we still do it on the weekends, but during the week I am dead tired and dont want to. It bothers my husband because he says once we have some good sex it makes him want it more and he feels like I am not into him if we dont do it. Well, I just continue to explain that I am tired, it is the last thing on my mind at bed time and if he wants a chance he better rub my back, hug me, cuddle with me, etc. We just had this conversation today!

Mrs.Andrews
by Mandy on Jan. 25, 2013 at 2:10 PM
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It's normal to lose your sex drive in pregnancy. It's not ok for him to be very angry with  you for it. You need to talk to him about how you feel, and he needs to hear you. If that doesn't work, you guys could probably benefit from marriage counseling.

BosGirl0906
by on Jan. 25, 2013 at 2:18 PM
Same here. I had to take progesterone suppositories til I was 13 weeks and it made me jus NOT want to have sex at all. When I got off those, it got better. But now, I'm 27wks5days and I jus don't wanna do it. My DH doesn't push me. He is pretty understanding which is a shock because when we've had slow spells pre-pregnancy, he'd be all "if you don't start putting out, I'm leaving" lol but he's been really supportive during this pregnancy. You should tell ur DH it's not all about him anymore. He has no right to be angry with you over that. That's jus petty and childish. Good luck!
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ittyprincess604
by on Jan. 25, 2013 at 2:21 PM

 ive lost my desire too, but usually just let DH have his way and be satisfied. I feel like he shouldnt have to suffer just because im too tired or something.

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