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Pregnancy Pregnancy

Well that didnt go over well..

Posted by on Mar. 10, 2013 at 10:28 AM
  • 30 Replies

Well I tried to speak with SO last night about him getting a job. He was to say the least not happy and we went to be not speaking. I didnt come at him wrong I sat down on my laptop pulled up craigslist and pulled up jobs he said hed LIKE to have. So in looking at them he said "you realize I have to pass a drug test for all of these and I smoke weed" i said youve drank water for days before and stopped so you can go test and you passed. he responded job ones dont work like that! So i guilt tripped him and said you know what fine Ill work two jobs in my state and you can sit at home an play your stupid playstation that I bought you so you would have something to do at night an not bitch! He looked at me an said I dont want to work different days then you youll go places and ill be freaked out. I dont like it. I was horridly mad at this I was irrate. I looked at him an said well I dont want to carrying twins but I dont have a choice in this matter now do I??! You wanted these kids you have to work too. An he just said I said I would do it but I wont like it and I wont be happy about it. At this time I said whatever and walked out of the room an sat in the living room. He left took the dog for a walk and I talked to my cousin about the issue. I support SO right now. I buy his cigs an his weed and I take care of the house an bills all he does for me is watch my four year old an three year old on the weekends while im at work when they in all reality could go to a grandparents if it came down to it. My cousin said if he doesnt want to be a man then stop buying him stuff. No cigs no weed nothing. (Before you ask he does NOT smoke in my home or around me or my children) He will then see the value of a dollar. It is true that SO has everything handed to him at the house. I give him a hundred every two weeks and then little stuff here an there. I think I have decided he has a week to start looking at that point I will not be buying him anything. If after two weeks from now he still isnt looking he will be asked to leave. I shouldnt have to support him and four children with him just sitting on his butt playing a play station. Having four children on my own will be hard and I have no idea how I will do it... but I have to do something and this just isnt working. He needs to work.. 

by on Mar. 10, 2013 at 10:28 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Bl3ss3dMommi
by on Mar. 10, 2013 at 10:34 AM
Yeah it sounds like you ended up with another kid. I would do like you day and just stop. That's ridiculous.
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Becka8707
by Member on Mar. 10, 2013 at 10:41 AM
I definitely agree that he needs to.work. my SO got two jobs when we found out Im expecting.. im sorry you have to go through this added stress while pregnant. I have heard of detox pills or drinks you can get that alloe a dirty urine to pass clean (it takes an average user 30 days of sobriety to pass a marijuana drug test depending on what how much and how often he smokes it could take longer) even so there are other jobs that do not drug test and i dont mean to be rude but no onw wants to work as am adult its someyhing you do because you have to as a parent its because your children depend on you to work. I would definitely give hin a time frame to begin looking as well as a time frame to get a job. Good luck mommy i hope it gets better for you
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Strawberry2008
by on Mar. 10, 2013 at 10:42 AM

I hope he decides to step up and do what's best for his family rather than just what he would prefer for himself....especially with babies on the way. And if he doesn't then I'm sure you can do better for them on your own than having another "child" to care for....Wishing you lots of luck!

T-Rentsmommy06
by on Mar. 10, 2013 at 10:44 AM
Exactly. It is time for him to grow up. I wouldn't be able to stay with someone like that for too long. Good luck with your pregnancy, hopefully he gets a job soon.

Quoting Bl3ss3dMommi:

Yeah it sounds like you ended up with another kid. I would do like you day and just stop. That's ridiculous.
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Amycapl
by on Mar. 10, 2013 at 10:45 AM

why are you spending your money buying him drugs?  that is money that could be going to any of your 4 childrens' needs.  what state do you live in?  is weed illegal where you live? obviously it's frowned upon if he can't get a job while smoking.  My DH used to smoke, too.  Then he needed to be a man and get a job so he quit.  I'm not judging you at ALL.  Just trying to back you up and get you seeing clearly. your kids deserve more than him. He is not doing right by any of you.  I hope things work out for you all!

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FarmGirl2B
by Silver Member on Mar. 10, 2013 at 10:49 AM
Sorry, momma! I agree with your cousin. And I would so be jumping up and down on that playstation!
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brittany208
by on Mar. 10, 2013 at 10:50 AM
2 moms liked this

He sounds like a winner.... I couldn't be with someone that put drugs before work/taking care of his responsibilities. I for sure would NOT be buying him things anymore. If he wants them, he can get a job. And, yeah, I highly doubt i would be with him anymore. You deserve better. Good luck!

cadkins07
by Bronze Member on Mar. 10, 2013 at 10:52 AM

We live in Ohio. I make extremely good money. I dont live off of food stamps and I work a decent schedule. I just buy him things instead of my self. I do now see it as things I could be buying for the twins (which is why im saying im not buying it anymore he needs to work an do it himself) My kids have more then most kids do, and wear nothing but brand name things (granted I know where to shop and get good deals). I wasnt thinking you were judging. I just dont know what to do, because having twins and two toddlers alone means I will have no sleep at all and cant work my schedule I do now because the grandparents that watch my first two are from my previous marriage and are theirs.. where as these two are not. And I work weekends so day care is out.

FarmGirl2B
by Silver Member on Mar. 10, 2013 at 11:04 AM
No judgements here. If he wants to smoke weed, then he should have to pay for it. He should also realize that he needs to get off his duff because working 2 jobs while carrying twins is ridiculous. It sure doesn't make him much of a partner. He shouldn't be whining because you asked him to help out. I don't know how you are keeping your sanity! I hope you get it figured out!
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cadkins07
by Bronze Member on Mar. 10, 2013 at 11:20 AM

Jumping up an down on the playstation would be funny (however its two weeks old and 500 gb) So i would just sell it an get the 300 dollars back for it.  Keeping my sanity is hard I cramp all the time I cramped for thirty minutes last night. He didnt seem to care just rubbed his temples an turned over. Yay for me... he is an ass... :(

Quoting FarmGirl2B:

No judgements here. If he wants to smoke weed, then he should have to pay for it. He should also realize that he needs to get off his duff because working 2 jobs while carrying twins is ridiculous. It sure doesn't make him much of a partner. He shouldn't be whining because you asked him to help out. I don't know how you are keeping your sanity! I hope you get it figured out!



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