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Pregnancy Pregnancy

UPDATE: It was confirmed today. Miscarriage Mistake?? PLEASE Help me with this, I am So Lost and confused!

Posted by on Mar. 28, 2013 at 4:25 PM
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It was definitely a miscarriage and they suggested that I wait another two weeks, by that time I should start a period. Also they said I am perfectly healthy and so is hubby so no problems that will prevent us from trying again. But we are going to wait a year before trying so she prescribed a low dose BC pill and said as soon as I start bleeding i should start taking it. I want to take this year to get in shape, get on a better eating regimen, and work on my relationship with my children And my Hubby.

Thank you ladies So much for all your support and advice, I really needed it through this. I hope to be here again soon.

Ok so it all started like any pregnancy. We had not been trying to have a baby- in fact the plan was to wait a few more years, until dd3 was 3-4 - so when I began to suspect I was preggo, though I was not totally surprised - my last 2 dd's were 'surprises'!- I was Distraught, we were not ready for another baby, i was not emotionally, mentally or physiclly prepared. But as time passed I got used to the idea and even found myself becoming excited and happy. Hubby had taken it Way better from the beginning, smiling and joking about me being ' a fertile myrtle' Gosh! LOL 

So then fast forward two weeks. I go in for my first midwife appointment. The other 3 baby's I used an ob, but I was So unhappy with my last ob and the whole experiance throughout my pregnancy and labor with him- Whole other story-  I wanted to do it a little different this time, and lots of women have told me that midwifes tend to be more personal, less clinical and so forth. 

I was excited and could not wait to see that first image of baby. So first i saw the US tech, and I knew something was wrong right away, she did the belly ultrasound first but said she could not see very much so she would have to do a vaginal US. So she did that and still only saw a little tiny thing. At this point, I saw her face and my ears just starting buzzing, so if there had been a heart beat sound I would not have heard it. She says, Honey I am sorry but it looks like an early miscarriage. This embryo looks to small according to your last period. She said some other stuff, I was so Stunned I could barely blink, I don't remember saying much, but , HUH? You are not serious?' So then she sent me to the room to wait for the midwife who looked at the US and said that she thought an early miscarriage because of the 'last period' and the size of the embro. Of course i freaked, but the next part is what has really got me Totally Freaked out, confused.

1st, I asked her several times if there was No other test she could do to confirm it. I felt like she should at least do some blood work. she Absolutely refused. Would not even consider it. Basicly ' I think you miscarried and I know what I am talking about, so my word is final and I don't have to consider any other option' was her attitude. Only she wants to see me next Thursday for a 'Confirmation US'.  After talking to a few other women who have been through this, and 2 nurses, all of them said she Should have done blood work at least, right then to confirm! Also that just because my Period ended a certain day, it Does Not mean that is when I concieved. I could have concieved several days or a week or so later, even if i was not at peak ovulation. Aparatly that happens alot..... =/

2nd she said I should start bleeding this week, and that I would probably get cramps, headache, etc. 

I have had NO symptoms of a miscarriage so far but continued syptoms of pregnancy. Nausea, frequent urination, cravings, etc.

I am SO scared and lost. I don't know what to believe. We have gone through 2 weeks of grieveing and mourning. We told only a few family/close friends about the pregnancy and the same people later about our loss. We bought a tree and planted it in memorial of our baby. 

Somebody please tell me what is normal. Was she wrong in how she handled this? Could she possibly have been mistaken? And how am I supposed to proceed now, how am I supposed to feel!? I really need words, advice, your thoughts on this.......

Shai-Happy mom to Emi Angie and Baby 'Bells

by on Mar. 28, 2013 at 4:25 PM
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Replies (1-10):
rliperote2
by on Mar. 28, 2013 at 4:29 PM
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Go to a ob im going to get bashed for saying this but i would not go to a midwife they have alot less training then obs do, they also dont have the same income so they dont have the quality of equipment a ob would have  in most cases.  If your not spotting your probably still pregnant i ovulate late in my cycle and im also behind a week what they say i should be and that makes A HUGE difference in them seeing a heart beat.  They should have done blood work if you were miscarring your body hcg levels would be going down.  But go go to a doctor

angevil53
by on Mar. 28, 2013 at 4:30 PM
She could be wrong. It's very possible. I had a blighted ovum and had light spotting. That's it. My hcg levels still rose and i had pregnancy symptoms along with the spotting. My levels did not double though. It really is just a wait and see kind of thing. Blood work can help but you'd still have to wait a few days for results. The us is better. Hopefully you go in and you see a hb.
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angevil53
by on Mar. 28, 2013 at 4:31 PM
Mine still rose during my mc. Just didn't double.


Quoting rliperote2:

Go to a ob im going to get bashed for saying this but i would not go to a midwife they have alot less training then obs do, they also dont have the same income so they dont have the quality of equipment a ob would have  in most cases.  If your not spotting your probably still pregnant i ovulate late in my cycle and im also behind a week what they say i should be and that makes A HUGE difference in them seeing a heart beat.  They should have done blood work if you were miscarring your body hcg levels would be going down.  But go go to a doctor


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dizzydreamer
by on Mar. 28, 2013 at 4:31 PM

I wouldn't trust that and would try to see either another midwife or OB and get your levels drawn, especially if you haven't started bleeding.  Good luck.

SuperMom2433
by Silver Member on Mar. 28, 2013 at 4:31 PM
Aw, sweetie, Im so sorry. I think what you need to do is def get your blood drawn to watch your hcg levels. Im not really sure what kind of advice to give you but i wish you luck.
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mommyto7lw
by on Mar. 28, 2013 at 4:33 PM

are you still testing strong postive on tests? if so get another doctor

Maevelyn
by on Mar. 28, 2013 at 4:33 PM

I would go to a different doctor. My doctor didn't see what she expected to see with my dd. So she told me to not panic or presume anything. She did blood work, got my hormone levels and the scheduled an ultrasound for a few days later (with blood work to follow if needed.) When I went back in there she was with her little heart just beating away! One ultrasound early in is not a diagnosis. 

DACIA79
by Silver Member on Mar. 28, 2013 at 4:35 PM
Quoting rliperote2:

Go to a ob im going to get bashed for saying this but i would not go to a midwife they have alot less training then obs do, they also dont have the same income so they dont have the quality of equipment a ob would have  in most cases.  If your not spotting your probably still pregnant i ovulate late in my cycle and im also behind a week what they say i should be and that makes A HUGE difference in them seeing a heart beat.  They should have done blood work if you were miscarring your body hcg levels would be going down.  But go go to a doctor


Goofygadget
by on Mar. 28, 2013 at 4:36 PM
I wouldn't even trust going back to her. There are blood test. They will show your hgc levels and then check it again to make sure it's on track. I would worry she'd just want to be right so she'd drag her feet at the thought of it being okay. Find someone else.
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GoddessNDaRuff
by on Mar. 28, 2013 at 4:38 PM

I've had four miscarriages and what they are telling you is correct. She should have taken blood and checked your HCG levels and then then done a comparison later. Also if you have not started bleeding there is a chance you need a D&C and you could become very ill if don't pass the products of conception.  Seems like the midwife you chose isn't very good. I had one of those before and switched midwives mid pregnancy I hated her so much. So my advice would be to get another opinion from another midwife or ob, even at the ER if necessary.

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