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Pregnancy Pregnancy

He's still smoking... OT

Posted by on Jul. 1, 2013 at 4:34 PM
  • 15 Replies

 I quit for my pregnancy, my husband promised to as well. We have been trying and failing for a while... Now we have a good reason!

 After a couple weeks, he would come home smelling like it. I asked him about it, and he said "It was just one"

 Now he's back to smoking all the time. (NEVER in the house, and our son has never seen us smoke). I was upset about it, and his reply was "I'm not the one that's pregnant." 

 I'm really upset over this...  

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by on Jul. 1, 2013 at 4:34 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Pandapanda
by Cafe Panda on Jul. 1, 2013 at 4:49 PM
1 mom liked this

Let him know that even if he's not smoking in your/baby's presence, it still increases the odds of SIDS in babies after birth if he smells like it. 

tammy_lynne
by on Jul. 1, 2013 at 7:17 PM

 I will tell him, I didn't even think of that. I hate smelling it too. I know I can keep it up and not smoke after the baby is here, I just wish he could do the same. He has been smoking for much longer than me, so that might be why it is harder for him.

 Also everyone that works with him smokes.  


Quoting Pandapanda:

Let him know that even if he's not smoking in your/baby's presence, it still increases the odds of SIDS in babies after birth if he smells like it. 



Clemency3
by on Jul. 1, 2013 at 7:28 PM

My Husband is the same. He won't quit worth a damn. However the affects of 2nd and 3rd hand smoke are a major issue for me. My daughter got allergies from infancy because he would never take the proper measures afterwards and he still doesn't. but this time around I am going to enforce that if he wants to smoke he needs to wash his hands and wash his mouth out before he goes around the baby. He already uses a dyer cling free sheet over his shirt which helps a little. But I have learned that if he can be willing to take these steps then I have to let it go. Can't control him or make him do something that he doesn't want. 

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BrittBratt
by Member on Jul. 1, 2013 at 8:23 PM
I went through this with both my ex husband, while I was carrying our two kids, AND my current DH with our first. The smell made me SO grossed out... it just made me want to puke my guts out. Thankfully, my DH quit before I got pregnant with our twins. He now can't stand the smell, and understands why I would ream him out LOL it's such a disgusting habit.
shortcake82418
by on Jul. 1, 2013 at 8:29 PM

yeah once you quit the smell is disgusting esp while pregnant. my hubby smokes too, only outside but i do smell it on him sometimes.

HJMF
by on Jul. 1, 2013 at 8:36 PM
My dr is advising me to cut back to nothing over a 3 month period, due to being such a heavy smoker for so long and being high risk for m/c. It's going quite well actually, but I made DH promise he'd quit with me, but I'm not sure he wants to. He's trying because I asked him to, but I can tell it's bothering him. I may just let him do his thing as long as I can't see or smell it on him. Lucky for me, they are slowly starting to make me sick, so I'm pretty sure I will be able to cut back sooner. The dr said as long as it's gradual, I should be ok. I'm sorry you're having issues with DH. Sometimes you just gotta pick and choose your battles. Is it more important than keeping your relationship? Only you can make that choice. Good luck!
tammy_lynne
by on Jul. 1, 2013 at 9:02 PM

 I didn't say it was ending our relationship, I'm allowed to be upset when he breaks his promises to me. I didn't even ask him to quit, he wanted to do it with me.  


Quoting HJMF:

My dr is advising me to cut back to nothing over a 3 month period, due to being such a heavy smoker for so long and being high risk for m/c. It's going quite well actually, but I made DH promise he'd quit with me, but I'm not sure he wants to. He's trying because I asked him to, but I can tell it's bothering him. I may just let him do his thing as long as I can't see or smell it on him. Lucky for me, they are slowly starting to make me sick, so I'm pretty sure I will be able to cut back sooner. The dr said as long as it's gradual, I should be ok. I'm sorry you're having issues with DH. Sometimes you just gotta pick and choose your battles. Is it more important than keeping your relationship? Only you can make that choice. Good luck!



NoraDun
by Gold Member on Jul. 1, 2013 at 9:26 PM
My Hubby smokes but only the days he works, and only on his drive home! (He works 14 days out of the month) I haven't seen him smoke in probably 7 or 8 yrs. And my kids never have! I can tell when he has though because he smells awful!!
HJMF
by on Jul. 1, 2013 at 10:08 PM
I wasn't trying to be rude, and yes you're allowed to be upset, and you made it sound like you are having relationship problems, sorry if you took my comment the wrong way.

Quoting tammy_lynne:

 I didn't say it was ending our relationship, I'm allowed to be upset when he breaks his promises to me. I didn't even ask him to quit, he wanted to do it with me.  



Quoting HJMF:

My dr is advising me to cut back to nothing over a 3 month period, due to being such a heavy smoker for so long and being high risk for m/c. It's going quite well actually, but I made DH promise he'd quit with me, but I'm not sure he wants to. He's trying because I asked him to, but I can tell it's bothering him. I may just let him do his thing as long as I can't see or smell it on him. Lucky for me, they are slowly starting to make me sick, so I'm pretty sure I will be able to cut back sooner. The dr said as long as it's gradual, I should be ok. I'm sorry you're having issues with DH. Sometimes you just gotta pick and choose your battles. Is it more important than keeping your relationship? Only you can make that choice. Good luck!




HJMF
by on Jul. 1, 2013 at 10:11 PM
"We have been trying and failing for a while. Now we have a good reason." That sounded like you were having issues, sorry if I didn't understand it, and it was supposed to mean something different? Maybe failing on the smoking part? I'm not sure.
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