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No One in My Delivery Room!

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My first birth I invited my whole family. What a disaster! Here are a few things that ruined it! :

- My mom basically pushed my husband out of the way to help hold my leg during delivery then complained later that he didn't help.

- My hubby wanted to cut the cord (it was a special moment), then my Mom cut it again after him (so wierd).  It totally ruined the it for my hubby, it was suppose to be HIS moment not hers..

- My Mom held the baby after me, then my sister.  When my Hubby asked to hold the baby since it was HIS child, my sister gave him a dirty look and relcutantly handed him over.  If anything they should offered for him to hold the baby first instead of stealing him away.

Afterwards all they could talk about was how my husband didn't help and how nervous he was, what a horrible guy!  Basically it ruined everything for me and I will never have anyone in there again.  My man was very sweet during the delivery, never left my side and video taped the whole thing.  He was very nervous because he was worried for me. For some reason my family wanted to create drama and gossip for no reason and I told them to go to hell and leave me alone so I could enjoy my son and wonderful husband.

Whew!  Long story short,

My second birth (girl),  I invited nobody and my hubby was there the whole time and cut the cord etc....  It was the best day ever.

This has nothing to do with what any of you, or what you should do. I'm sure other people have very supportive families.  I just never expected MY family to be the MONSTER in laws. LOL This time it will be the same as my daughter, NO One Allowed!

Mommy of two, third on the way!

www.parent2u.com

by on Jul. 29, 2013 at 3:43 PM
Replies (31-40):
karenbeth214
by on Jul. 29, 2013 at 5:16 PM
Don't tell her when you go into labor. Simple solution. Or tell the nurses only you and your husband, she won't get in


Quoting Navix:

ADVICE NEEDED!! I'm in a bit of a pickle and was so happy to find this post! Here's the deal...my husband and I both just want it to be us in the delivery room, we are having our first baby in November and just want it to be a special moment between the two of us. However, his mom is very adament about being in there with us. We've already informed her that we just want it to be the two of us but she is insistent upon being in the room. My mom is totally cool with it just being the two of us (then again she has like 10 grandbabies!), but she said if my MIL is in there then she'll definitely be in there! The problem is, we've already told my MIL that we just want it to be the two of us but she is adament about being in there. How can we get this through to her in a nice way? My husband tried to put his foot down and we even discussed just telling the nurses not to let her in, but we know her and she'll somehow find a way into that delivery room! What happend was my SIL let her and my FIL in the delivery room so they just assumed we would want them in there too. I just see this turning out very badly, like it could be a warzone in there, but we don't want to be on bad terms.\ with them because they're so excited. HELP PLEASE!!


Devious103102
by on Jul. 29, 2013 at 5:22 PM

I've never allowed anyone else except for the father in the delivery room (though I did allow visitors/other people while I was in labor). The only time I did was with DD3, I had SIL with me because DH wasn't home yet (he was in route home from deployment). 

jae414
by on Jul. 29, 2013 at 5:25 PM
1 mom liked this
With my first, it was my mom and dh. But my mom was awesome! She didn't say much, stayed out of the way, and didn't ruin the experience at all. I was the first and last delivery she stayed in the room for. She said she couldn't handle watching her babies hurt like that again. Lol
Gabrielle1982
by on Jul. 29, 2013 at 5:27 PM
1 mom liked this

 The same would happen if I let anyone else into my room, too.  Sorry you two had to go through that.  :(

CafeMom Tickers
Allinaday
by on Jul. 29, 2013 at 5:34 PM

What was funny about my labor was my hubby was very worried for me and yet all my family did was criticise him for it. He cares so much about me and was a little freaked out to see me in so much pain (I am normally the ROCK in the family).  So I thought it was sweet that he was so nervous but sucked it up and helped when he could and taped the whole thing plus wanted tot cut the cord.

So how my family turned it into a bad thing that he was worried for me, I don't know.  The nurse said that some husbands can't even stay in the room because they are so sick.  She also said some husbands pass out, so I thought mine did really well. LOL

MamaPanda16
by on Jul. 29, 2013 at 5:36 PM

I had DH and my mom.  My mom was there just to give support to both of us because we had moved and didn't take any classes.  I am very close to my mom and wanted her there with us.  My mom was there to coaching us on what to do.  She will be with us again because I want her.  It put both of us at ease knowing that she was there to give us the support we needed.

Allinaday
by on Jul. 29, 2013 at 5:39 PM


I agree, you can say that it just went so fast and unexpected that you didn't have time to call. ; )

Quoting karenbeth214:

Don't tell her when you go into labor. Simple solution. Or tell the nurses only you and your husband, she won't get in


Quoting Navix:

ADVICE NEEDED!! I'm in a bit of a pickle and was so happy to find this post! Here's the deal...my husband and I both just want it to be us in the delivery room, we are having our first baby in November and just want it to be a special moment between the two of us. However, his mom is very adament about being in there with us. We've already informed her that we just want it to be the two of us but she is insistent upon being in the room. My mom is totally cool with it just being the two of us (then again she has like 10 grandbabies!), but she said if my MIL is in there then she'll definitely be in there! The problem is, we've already told my MIL that we just want it to be the two of us but she is adament about being in there. How can we get this through to her in a nice way? My husband tried to put his foot down and we even discussed just telling the nurses not to let her in, but we know her and she'll somehow find a way into that delivery room! What happend was my SIL let her and my FIL in the delivery room so they just assumed we would want them in there too. I just see this turning out very badly, like it could be a warzone in there, but we don't want to be on bad terms.\ with them because they're so excited. HELP PLEASE!!




Allinaday
by on Jul. 29, 2013 at 6:16 PM

I thought my family was going to be great, that's why I invited them.  Boy was I wrong.  I'm glad you have great support.  That's the way it should be.


Quoting MamaPanda16:

I had DH and my mom.  My mom was there just to give support to both of us because we had moved and didn't take any classes.  I am very close to my mom and wanted her there with us.  My mom was there to coaching us on what to do.  She will be with us again because I want her.  It put both of us at ease knowing that she was there to give us the support we needed.



MamaPanda16
by on Jul. 29, 2013 at 6:28 PM

My family lives over 3,000 miles away so it is great to see them whenever I do.  My mom was also the first person I told that I was pregnant because I had to wait till DH got off work.  I am so glad my mom is flying up in December and staying till January to help with setting things up for the baby and with DS and I won't be alone at anytime.  I don't think that I want anyone to visit me after I have the baby because I was practically falling asleep after having DS.  We might have to drop DS off and then whoever we drop him off with they can come visit but that is all. 

Quoting Allinaday:

I thought my family was going to be great, that's why I invited them.  Boy was I wrong.  I'm glad you have great support.  That's the way it should be.


Quoting MamaPanda16:

I had DH and my mom.  My mom was there just to give support to both of us because we had moved and didn't take any classes.  I am very close to my mom and wanted her there with us.  My mom was there to coaching us on what to do.  She will be with us again because I want her.  It put both of us at ease knowing that she was there to give us the support we needed.




sugarcrisp
by on Jul. 29, 2013 at 11:38 PM
1 mom liked this

I'm so sorry for your first experience. How disheartening, and the nerve they had to speak so negatively of him after is pretty crappy. 

My son's father was not there as acting like a fool was more important. Such a shame that somebody with his talents and potential has chosen to throw it all away. 

Fiance won't be able to be here for our daughter's birth so I'll have my mother and grandmother there for the birth just as they were for my son. Obviously I have no complaints with them. :P


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