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Anyone else feel like their husband is trying to make them mad???

Posted by on Sep. 8, 2013 at 7:00 PM
  • 9 Replies

  Good God Almighty.

Besides raging hormones, mood swings, severe pain in my back and hips related to having had three spinal surgeries, and a husband that's just...well...difficult, I'm losing my cool about every 10 minutes. I can deal with the first three on their own, but my hubby is about as sensitve as a cinder block. I do my best not to explode at him, but when he says things like, "Oh, it'll be all better once you squirt it out", or "We can't have sex twice a day? But why not????", or wakes me up at 7 am on a Sunday by jumping on the bed like a 210 pound 5 year old (I was sound asleep and dreaming), or asks me to go with him to work an hour away where there's no where comfy to sit, or lie down for 10 hours, then begs me to go mini-golfing with him, when I can barely walk 1/4 mile without severe pain - OR take a long drive, which makes me carsick. 

Then, to add insult to injury, there's 3 perfectly good, nicely prepared leftover meals in the fridge, that he can't seem to heat up himself, and won't eat all day, unless I do it for him. He whines and cries until I heat them up, or fix something new, despite the fact I'm 29 weeks, have no energy, and it's hard for me to move without pain. 

I am to the point where it's a RELIEF to get him out of the house and to work in the morning, cause he simply can't stop saying or doing these things. I love him within an inch of his life, but here the last month or so, he's been so difficult to live with, I don't know how I'm going to make it with both my 43 y/o little boy, and my newborn little boy!!! HELP!

by on Sep. 8, 2013 at 7:00 PM
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Replies (1-9):
LuvMyBoys09
by Bronze Member on Sep. 8, 2013 at 7:07 PM
I'm sorry you have to deal with that.
I'd just tell him tough titties....if you refuse to heat up the leftovers on your own, you'll just starve....put on your big boy pants.

I got lucky this time because my SO is amazing.
He cooks for me when he knows I don't feel up to it...he'll do it if I ask, regardless but I like doing it myself.

You need to expect from him, what he seems to expect from you.
ElsaH
by Member on Sep. 8, 2013 at 7:33 PM

My SO pisses me off by being annoying and then when the headache and bodyaches and hormones get the best of me, I just snap. He always wants to talk about things that I don't want to talk about right then and then when I start getting an attitude he's like "Oh, I know you're just being emotional so I'll talk with you later." "You're being over dramatic about this." and when I prove him wrong he says those things again. I want to punch him, so I just take a nap and ignore his existence for just a little while. But then something abruptly wakes me up, or my phone goes off every 5 minutes (of course only when I'm napping.) or the dogs start barking and I feel bad about being in a terrible mood all day. Then I go from raging B**** to crying about being mean all the time. This blows. I have the first time pregnancy suck.

funhappymom
by Bronze Member on Sep. 10, 2013 at 9:06 AM

Have you sat down and talked to him? Explain that you need some help and that he's upsetting you?


mamav2215
by Bronze Member on Sep. 10, 2013 at 9:30 AM

oh my god we're living the same life... well mine isn't as bad, he can feed himself.

I'm 33 weeks (first baby) and I'm miserable some of the time and just uncomfortable the rest. My back hurts like hell (i have acid reflux SOOOOO bad I have tos leep literally sitting up and it kills my back) she kicked my ribs so hard I have a bruised one and that flares up randomly. I was refusing to ask him for back rubs anymore because he was so grouchy when I did and did a crappy job on purpose I think. BUT it's been sooo bad lately I've been asking a lot and it's of course grouchy. I just wanna punch him and telll him to carry an extra 30 lbs not even displaced and a huge bowling ball around in his stomach. I do offer to rub his as well but he always says no. 

He is not sympathetic with anything else. I was litereally awake from 1 until 530 and at 630 when he got up I asked him if he culd plese take the dogs for a walk for me so I could try and sleep in. He did it but when he got back didn't talk to me. haha. I'm sure we're both just on edge with baby coming soon, but sometimes I wanna be like, "you don't physically have to do anything... so shut your mouth and feel bad fo rme and encourage me"  :) but that's not reasonable for me to do.

as for yours.... at least he wants to do things with you, my husband signs up for something everyweekend (mostly races or volunteering at races and I can't do most of it) he never asks if I'd like to do something. Mostly it's okay cause I really am uncomfortable but it's still iritating and i'm bored. (it's a new city) As for the food stuff.... he's not going to actually let himself starve. I would not reheat food for my husband unless he were laid up somehow. THat's ridiculous. 

davidnjonsmommy
by Member on Sep. 10, 2013 at 10:02 AM
I'm so sorry that he is being like that.

I can't really relate. My DH is so supportive and loving.

Have you tried talking to him about it?
krystyneh
by Bronze Member on Sep. 10, 2013 at 10:06 AM
1 mom liked this
I'm sorry :( my husband pisses me off when it comes to not helping with house work since I'm 10 days away from my due date and I've been contracting off and on. It also pisses me off when I do have a contraction and automatically it's "you better call your doctor" SERIOUSLY!?! One contraction isn't labor lol but besides those two things my husband helps me a lot and makes sure I'm as comfortable as I can be :)
mommyof2andTTC
by Bronze Member on Sep. 10, 2013 at 10:19 AM
Lmao it sounds like your already a mother to one... he sounds like he's not so sypathetic because he doesn't know what its like... my husband is about as sensitive as sand also and is about as observant as a wall but let me tell you, I could be 3 rooms away and up a flight of stairs and he just knows when I have a contraction... idk how he does it but the minute i have one he's right there next to me... and this is a guy who can't remember to get his keys out of the ignition when he leaves the car lmao...

It doesn't sound like he's trying to piss you off but more like he has always been like this and your just now noticing because you can't do it anymore...
ksher7005
by on Sep. 11, 2013 at 8:40 AM

LOL - If was only that easy. I asked him to clean up after himself in the mud room, and on the kitchen desk, and he transferred it to the kitchen table, then said he had cleaned it. Then, this morning, as soon as I get downstairs, he tells me his 2 year old Shepherd peed on a piece of my furniture, but he only cleaned it up with a little spray stuff. (That effing dog has been peeing in the house, and dragging mud in constantly for the last 3 weeks) Half of my cleanup has been that damn dog, getting mud and piss all over the house, not just the floors, but the furniture, walls, floorboards, etc...

(We have four large dogs. The other three, while hairy, have not been a problem.)

I ask him nicely to help. I beg him. I whine, I cry, I plead. I make a chalkboard list of 'honey-do' things that are reasonable (Monday, do the dishes, fold two loads of towels. Tuesday, go through the mail, clean up your office, and get your brother to help you move the couch from the upstairs hallway, etc...) He just doesn't care, and doesn't listen. I finally resorted to asking his Mom for help, which worked, except she can't be here to keep him doing anything for more than a few hours. 

So, I have resorted to being the queen beeatch. Which for me, causes problems, especially on mornings like THIS morning...I'm a massage therapist, and try being calm after your significant other makes you want to throw knives at him. (He asked for an omelet. I'm almost 30 weeks pregnant, and I have four patients today.)

I swear to GOD, it's like asking him if he'll give me a million dollars, when all I really want is him to be considerate of me!



ksher7005
by on Sep. 11, 2013 at 8:43 AM

haha!!! My husband has yet to notice any of my pregnancy symptoms besides me being grouchy. I had my first Braxton Hicks the other night, while sitting on the couch watching television, and he didn't notice. He claims he can't feel our son kicking either. Sheesh, I had that Sydney norovirus back in January, and he wasn't aware until 10 hours after I was symptomatic (I lost 20 pounds in 3 days.)

I just feel like he doesn't notice, and doesn't care.

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