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Pregnancy Pregnancy

this pregnancy is really getting in the way of my everday life...help

Posted by on Oct. 1, 2013 at 7:30 PM
  • 14 Replies
im only 20 weeks. this pregnancy is really getting in the way of me doing my day to day chores such as laundry, dishes, bathing myself, cooking dinner for SO and the kids. My body constantly aches, i have horrible headaches that even if i take a tylenol for it only helps for an hour. i will be trying to wash dishes and the smell of the soap will make me vomit, same with cooking dinner. i feel awful, like i am a bad spouse and parent because this pregnancy just has me feeling so low. my dr keeps telling me it will pass, drink more water....but so far...well i still feel the same...horrible
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by on Oct. 1, 2013 at 7:30 PM
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Replies (1-10):
NoraDun
by Gold Member on Oct. 1, 2013 at 7:47 PM

It gives you just an idea of how life changes after baby! Pregnancy is only the beginning! Hope thinsg get better hun!

iamnameless
by Silver Member on Oct. 1, 2013 at 7:50 PM
I know how you feel. You just got to push on. It may get better it may not be you keep trying to do your best. Some days your best will be paper plates and plastic forks. Some days it will be frozen lasagna or pizza so your not stuck in the room with the smell. My biggest challenge so far has been extreme tiredness. I rest when I can and push on the rest the time. I have used more easy meals on nights that I can barely keep my eyes open. I am cranky and when the kids get on my nerves I let them turn on sponge Bob. (I hate the show). We just have to keep going.
caligirl7613
by Bronze Member on Oct. 1, 2013 at 7:53 PM
this is my 3rd pregnancy. i have a 7 year old and 5 year old. both times before i had almost no problems at all. i had a very physically demanding job and was able to work all the way up until a week before delivery both times. idk why this pregnancy is so hard on me. i am only 25!


Quoting NoraDun:

It gives you just an idea of how life changes after baby! Pregnancy is only the beginning! Hope thinsg get better hun!


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caligirl7613
by Bronze Member on Oct. 1, 2013 at 7:57 PM
at least i am not alone. i was really starting to feel like i was a bad parent and spouse. i get the exhaustion too. i could literally sleep all day and night if i was able


Quoting iamnameless:

I know how you feel. You just got to push on. It may get better it may not be you keep trying to do your best. Some days your best will be paper plates and plastic forks. Some days it will be frozen lasagna or pizza so your not stuck in the room with the smell. My biggest challenge so far has been extreme tiredness. I rest when I can and push on the rest the time. I have used more easy meals on nights that I can barely keep my eyes open. I am cranky and when the kids get on my nerves I let them turn on sponge Bob. (I hate the show). We just have to keep going.

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bebcarroll
by on Oct. 1, 2013 at 8:01 PM

Yep, right there with you.  except I am only 19 weeks.  They keep telling me that it will get better.  I know from experience that yes, it will; the day I deliver.  Some tricks:

-swimming nose plug for smells (I bought it at Meijer (which is like Target with full grocery) this summer)

-I sit as much as possible, do you have a desk chair on wheels?, I use that and get around to doing more that way

- I use the broom, push everything in to a pile and use a grabber to put in a bin (plus a trash can for trash and a hamper for clothes.. because apparently my children forgot what a hamper is for.) My husband empties what he can from the bin, the kids do some and some get put aside for me to figure out later

-laundry- everyone takes their own laundry to the laundry room, I wash and dry (sitting in a chair if things get bad) then my husband brings it up stairs and I fold and sort it into separate baskets for each child... I am not worried right now about getting into their dressers... have many years ahead of me for that

-I bathe as soon as I am out of bed, before my brain wakes up... fastest showers in history but I am clean... if I wait I don't get one

Somethings I have had to make my older children start doing... unloading the dishwasher, putting groceries away, loading the dishwasher, getting the mail, feeding the pets and the big one; fetching things... the way I see it, I am only pregnant for 20 more weeks at most. That little time out of their lives won't hurt them and will help them become productive members of society.  Even at three the youngest helps out.  She carries dishes from the table, handles trash (she likes dumping the non gross cans into the big can in the kitchen ( I Won't let her touch the diaper pail or bathroom trash, cause she would just play in them.), she gets her own clothes in the morning, her shoes and socks and pull ups, she can also reach things that are on the floor so she helps me clean up.  The one place I've trouble is cleaning the bathroom.  I swipe the toilet bowl whenever I think of it (sometimes more than once an hour) I wipe down counters in there when I have a second, usually while washing my hands, and I run a wet cloth over the floor after the kids brush their teeth.  I don't touch the rest of it and I try to get my husband or the oldest to go in there on the weekends and make it not disgusting.  But nothing is up to the usual standard, but a basic level of not gross. 

The only thing that helps with all the aches I have been having is a hot bath.  I asked and my Dr. said that it was safe as long as I was comfortable. (One of my friends told me that hot baths would boil the baby, not true.)  I put Epsom salts in the tub and soak for as long as I can.  As for the headaches, I have a tiny bit of caffeine (less than a cup of coffee, also fine according to my Dr., keeps me regular too.) and drink at least 2 quarts of water a day. One thing that helped me was sparkling water, it does not make me nearly as sick as still water. 

And finally I rest WAAAAYYYY more than I did when I was pregnant before.  I have also curtailed anything I don't feel like doing, activity wise, like outside activities after school (unless they can get themselves to and from.) and big trips like shopping and the zoo.  And then I rest some more.  Yeah, some people get pregnant and keep training for marathons and keeping a perfect house.  And sometimes we have to be more realistic.  Just cause Janie down the street is making marinara and pasta from scratch does not mean you have to.    Good Luck! you are half way there and this is a very small portion of your children's and SO's life and in the end a healthy you and a healthy baby are the real goals.

cheetah90210
by Silver Member on Oct. 1, 2013 at 8:08 PM
I feel the same way but dh has helped alot glad ds is in school don't know what I would do
DesertDuck
by on Oct. 1, 2013 at 8:20 PM

I really understand. This has been rough, 24 weeks and I feel like I've been pregnant forever!

Don't try to be perfect. Do what you can, when you can, and don't be afraid to change up how you do things. For example, showering made me super nauseous later in the day, but I figured out that if I jumped in as soon as I woke up, my stomach would behave. Weird, but it worked. See what your family can do to help. Like, can you do the prep for dinner and have SO actually do the cooking part while you step out? Can the kids fold some laundry? Give 'em a squirt bottle with vinegar water to spot clean? Anything?

Sneak in extra rest wherever you can, too. Let SO get the kids down if that will free up some time for you to get to bed earlier.

caligirl7613
by Bronze Member on Oct. 1, 2013 at 8:26 PM
wow so many tips and tricks. thank you so much. sounds like u have a little one at home with you all day as well. i dont know if i would be able to make it if i was in that position. i am so glad mine are school age and that the bus literally drops them on our door step. at 245 i open the front door (we have a glass outside door) and i can sit on the couch and look at the door. at 250 the bus drops them off i watch them get off, walk 10 feet up the walkway n they are home. SO is a big help he handles all morning routine for me


Quoting bebcarroll:

Yep, right there with you.  except I am only 19 weeks.  They keep telling me that it will get better.  I know from experience that yes, it will; the day I deliver.  Some tricks:

-swimming nose plug for smells (I bought it at Meijer (which is like Target with full grocery) this summer)

-I sit as much as possible, do you have a desk chair on wheels?, I use that and get around to doing more that way

- I use the broom, push everything in to a pile and use a grabber to put in a bin (plus a trash can for trash and a hamper for clothes.. because apparently my children forgot what a hamper is for.) My husband empties what he can from the bin, the kids do some and some get put aside for me to figure out later

-laundry- everyone takes their own laundry to the laundry room, I wash and dry (sitting in a chair if things get bad) then my husband brings it up stairs and I fold and sort it into separate baskets for each child... I am not worried right now about getting into their dressers... have many years ahead of me for that

-I bathe as soon as I am out of bed, before my brain wakes up... fastest showers in history but I am clean... if I wait I don't get one

Somethings I have had to make my older children start doing... unloading the dishwasher, putting groceries away, loading the dishwasher, getting the mail, feeding the pets and the big one; fetching things... the way I see it, I am only pregnant for 20 more weeks at most. That little time out of their lives won't hurt them and will help them become productive members of society.  Even at three the youngest helps out.  She carries dishes from the table, handles trash (she likes dumping the non gross cans into the big can in the kitchen ( I Won't let her touch the diaper pail or bathroom trash, cause she would just play in them.), she gets her own clothes in the morning, her shoes and socks and pull ups, she can also reach things that are on the floor so she helps me clean up.  The one place I've trouble is cleaning the bathroom.  I swipe the toilet bowl whenever I think of it (sometimes more than once an hour) I wipe down counters in there when I have a second, usually while washing my hands, and I run a wet cloth over the floor after the kids brush their teeth.  I don't touch the rest of it and I try to get my husband or the oldest to go in there on the weekends and make it not disgusting.  But nothing is up to the usual standard, but a basic level of not gross. 

The only thing that helps with all the aches I have been having is a hot bath.  I asked and my Dr. said that it was safe as long as I was comfortable. (One of my friends told me that hot baths would boil the baby, not true.)  I put Epsom salts in the tub and soak for as long as I can.  As for the headaches, I have a tiny bit of caffeine (less than a cup of coffee, also fine according to my Dr., keeps me regular too.) and drink at least 2 quarts of water a day. One thing that helped me was sparkling water, it does not make me nearly as sick as still water. 

And finally I rest WAAAAYYYY more than I did when I was pregnant before.  I have also curtailed anything I don't feel like doing, activity wise, like outside activities after school (unless they can get themselves to and from.) and big trips like shopping and the zoo.  And then I rest some more.  Yeah, some people get pregnant and keep training for marathons and keeping a perfect house.  And sometimes we have to be more realistic.  Just cause Janie down the street is making marinara and pasta from scratch does not mean you have to.    Good Luck! you are half way there and this is a very small portion of your children's and SO's life and in the end a healthy you and a healthy baby are the real goals.


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caligirl7613
by Bronze Member on Oct. 1, 2013 at 8:33 PM
well SO does help with the kids in the mornings so i can rest more but he works with his uncle most days (long as the weather is good) doing landscaping but that is probably about to slow down with winter coming. he works nights at applebees as a cook so afterschool hw, dinner, bath n bed falls to me for the kids. sadly i have really kicked myself in the booty when it comes to my kids and chores...they really do not know how to do them cuz i hve always just done it myself


Quoting DesertDuck:

I really understand. This has been rough, 24 weeks and I feel like I've been pregnant forever!


Don't try to be perfect. Do what you can, when you can, and don't be afraid to change up how you do things. For example, showering made me super nauseous later in the day, but I figured out that if I jumped in as soon as I woke up, my stomach would behave. Weird, but it worked. See what your family can do to help. Like, can you do the prep for dinner and have SO actually do the cooking part while you step out? Can the kids fold some laundry? Give 'em a squirt bottle with vinegar water to spot clean? Anything?


Sneak in extra rest wherever you can, too. Let SO get the kids down if that will free up some time for you to get to bed earlier.


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austinsmama1106
by on Oct. 1, 2013 at 8:59 PM
My 3rd pregnancy was my hardest also. I was in so much pain everyday, taking care of the kids was hard (6 and 2 at the time). It all started around 24 weeks and she wasn't born until 40+5. I had a few good days and I would do everything I could those days but they were few and far between. Thankfully my husband understood and he just kept saying "just do what u can and I'll do what I can" honestly at the end of the day I made sure my kids had mommy time and they were fed.. in my eyes successful day!
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