Im having a hard time lately. I hate how Im feeling and reacting its insane. I don't know if its just crazy hormones or depression or both. Im 7mo pregnant with ds2 and happy about it. I can't wait to meet him and hold him. I just don't know if how Im feeling is because I have a lot on my plate and the hormones are taking over. My ds1 is special needs and he will be 3yr this month. So handling him and all that he needs is hard and this month we have a lot going on with him. I just have so much to be happy and grateful for that I get furious for feeling soo sad. My dh is great and Im very lucky to have his support with our son. The smallest thing sets me off and I just want to go to bed. I feel like I just want to be alone. I cry a lot and I get angry sooo fast. When Im sad over something I realize how insane Im being so I get even more upset because I can't help how I feel. Every day I wake up thinking today I will be better and it doesn't happen. Im getting nervous I don't want to have PPD. DH works 5-6 days a week so I'll be in charge of the boys and lets face it who has time to be depressed with a 3yr and new born. I keep thinking once I get thro this month I'll be a lot better. This month brings a lot of extra stress. My ds1 is going thro tests and starting his special-ed preschool. Im rushing to get an in-home aid in place because his therapy stops once he's 3yr so I need to find a replacement. Im getting all his forms together for ssi and just handling his every day struggles is weighing me down. Once he starts his school which will be Oct 28th and we get his in-home aid in place I feel like he and I will be in a better place til then I feel like everything is up in the air and a bit chaotic. Has anoyone else felt happy and excited to meet their new baby but just depressed and sad over the rest of their life. I feel like I have zero patience. Is any of this normal? Does feeling like this now put me at a higher risk for PPD? Thanks for any advice or support.