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5 Tips for Second Pregnancies - How close together will your kids be?

Posted by on Nov. 1, 2016 at 1:45 PM
  • 25 Replies

5 Tips for Second Pregnancies

Sasha Brown-Worsham
Sasha Brown-Worsham

pregnant mom and child
Flickr photo by Sean Dreilinger

There's a myth going around various mom groups and the Internet. That myth? Second pregnancies are easier. 

Physically? Maybe. If you're lucky. But any other way? Not so much.

Think about it. Not only are you experiencing all the joys of the first pregnancy -- nausea, exhaustion, various aches and pains -- but you're also doing it with another child underfoot.

I found out I was pregnant with ,y second child when my first child was only 9 months old. Since she was a late-ish walker (14 1/2 months), I spent much of my pregnancy hauling a 22+ pound sack of flour.

It wasn't easy.

But it doesn't always have to be so rough.

Fellow blogger Julia Magnusson of Boston, Massachusetts, is about to become a second-time mama this month (her first child, a son, is 23 months old). She offered a couple tips:

  • "Don't do it.  No, wait, too late for that."
  • "Your body (and pregnancy) may not be the same as during your first pregnancy. Maybe you were able to work out like a madwoman the first time around, but maybe not this time. Listen to your body and your midwife (or doctor). I learned the hard way and tore some ligaments after my knee gave out, thanks to the lovely relaxin flowing through my body."
  • "Be aware of your own limitations, and don't be afraid to make these clear to visitors. Especially visitors who want to show up late in the evening and linger far too long. Before you find yourself being absolutely, ungraciously rude (as I found myself last night), either pull your partner aside and ask him or her to clear out the guests -- if you lack the energy or any last shred of niceness to do it yourself -- or simply excuse yourself as 'tired' and leave the room." 

A couple more from me:

  • Think about what you need ahead of time, especially toward the end of the pregnancy. The day I went into labor with my son, I called my parents in tears begging them to come over and help me as I couldn't face another long, end-of-summer (it was August) day with my busy 18-month-old. Unfortunately for me, they were too busy. Had I planned ahead and had childcare in place for that miserable last couple weeks, I wouldn't have been in that position. Additionally, plan to need a ton of help after the baby is born. Have it in place. I went six weeks without having to be alone for a full day with a newborn and a toddler, and it saved my life.
  • A second pregnancy is the perfect time to relax your standards -- so the kid watches some extra Curious George while mommy sits in the air-conditioned living room. So you order takeout instead of making quinoa salad and sitting down as a family. So you bag the water park and let the kid splash in the bathtub instead. It's all OK. You will, believe it or not, be back to normal again and then you can have all those standards back, but those last few weeks of pregnancy are a really good time to ease up and slack a little.

How close together will your kids be? What are your tips for making the second pregnancy smooth sailing?

by on Nov. 1, 2016 at 1:45 PM
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Replies (1-10):
by Gold Member on Nov. 1, 2016 at 2:02 PM
Smooth sailing? Ha!
I have yet to experiment that this time around. Lol

My kids will be exactly 3 years apart.
by Group Admin on Nov. 1, 2016 at 2:52 PM

My first two were about 20 months apart. It was difficult, but we made it through. I'd say rest and enjoy the one on one with your first child as much as you can.

by Member on Nov. 2, 2016 at 3:56 PM
My kids will be 9 years apart 😹 But this second pregnancy is way different than my first! Definitely not smooth sailing. My first went smoothly, but this one has been difficult. I'm guessing because I'm older now, and my body isn't as young And healthy, lol! Will be checking back for tips xx
by Bronze Member on Nov. 2, 2016 at 10:25 PM
My son is 11, will be 12 before these babies are born, so it's different than moms who have a toddler or smaller child. He has a busy schedule with school and extra curricular activities, but he's also very independent.
by Member on Nov. 3, 2016 at 6:39 PM
My daughter will be 5, 3 months before baby is due.
She's already being a huge help. She doesn't mind that it literally takes me hours to get moving in the morning. She's only too excited to help take care of her new baby :)
by Member on Nov. 5, 2016 at 2:22 PM

My babies will be 20 months apart.

by Silver Member on Nov. 6, 2016 at 9:46 PM

My first two are 18.5 months apart.  Their little sibling is due to arrive next summer when DS will be just 4 and DD will be 2.5.   I'm insane. 

Definitely not handling the exhaustion or nausea well this time.  I just want to hole up and lie down and cry.  Yet I have to keep up with th monkeys. 

by Gold Member on Nov. 7, 2016 at 12:30 PM
My 1st and 2nd are about 18 months apart. My 4th and 5th are 19 months apart. My 3rd is the only one who's got any distance from the others. Lol. As it is there are 5 of them from 8 years to 1 month.

Right now the housework, laundry and dishes seem to be the hardest thing to keep up but I know I will get a rhythm going eventually and things will be organized again...i hope😅
by on Nov. 7, 2016 at 1:32 PM


by Bronze Member on Nov. 7, 2016 at 2:54 PM

My oldest two were 3 years apart roughly (my middle daughter was born about 6 weeks before the oldest daughter turned 3). My middle daughter and youngest daughter are 2 years and 2 weeks apart.

This baby, and my youngest daughter will be roughly 3 years apart (he'll be born about 2.5 months BEFORE my youngest turns 3). I think the 3 year age gap is WONDERFUL.

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