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culture vs. practicality when naming

Posted by on Nov. 21, 2017 at 11:53 PM
  • 17 Replies

okay, so, I want to know what people think about this...

I'm naming my baby in Ashkenazi tradition, because my family is Ashkenazi. I have a list of beautiful, traditional Ashkenazi Jewish names from my family. I like all of them, yes they might me hard to read or pronounce but I don't really care. 

Today I posted some ideas on facebook which was already a bad idea because, as everyone knows, facebook is the #1 source of unwanted opinions. Anyways, NINE different people jumped in the comments to tell me it was cruel to give a child such a confusing name, my kid would be bullied, no one would ever be able to pronounce it, people wouldn't take my kid seriously in adulthood when they try to have a career. 

These are all names of grandparents, great grandparents, great aunts and uncles. I think they are all beautiful and dignified. I'm trying not to let other people's opinions change my mind. I'm at 38 weeks and I'm still not 100% on any name. But are they right? Does it matter? 

Has anyone else been told the same? Did you reconsider? Or did you stick to your guns. 

anyways, names in question are Ackiva, Akive, Schaya, Manashko, Tyczko for a boy. Rasa, Chaja, Chajla, Saba, Alke, Zabine, Ziguna for a girl. 

by on Nov. 21, 2017 at 11:53 PM
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Replies (1-10):
NoraDun
by Platinum Member on Nov. 22, 2017 at 12:05 AM
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I personally considered the names and how they may affect my children's adult lives. I wanted strong, unique, but semi-easy to pronounce names. We have a few family names as well. I just wanted to avoid being stereotypical with our names, as some of the names in my Hubby's family are absolutely awful. We also have a lot of biblical names, which ironically people can't pronounce, but they really shouldn't be an issue. Anyway, for me I was concerned about future careers and how the name may affect them. The names you shared aren't names I would choose, but I am not Jewish, I don't have that heritage. I think if you want to carry on with tradition that is entirely up to you and no one else's business. 

We have Xavier O'Neal (O'Neal is my Husband's middle name) ,Malachi O'Mari, Laylah-Marie Elizabeth (Elizabeth is my and my Grandmothers middle name, as well as my MIL and GMIL middle name), Azariah Elijah, and Naomi-Grace Amelia. 

anotherandree
by Bronze Member on Nov. 22, 2017 at 12:23 AM
3 moms liked this
My name is Inga. When I was growing up, I wanted badly to be a Tiffany, Mary, or Karen. Something normal that I could find on a pen or mug at the store without having to special order it. My mother caught SO MUCH shit from everyone. My grandmother said the same things you mentioned that people said to you.

I'm 41 and absolutely love my name. Yes, I still can't find things with even my initials to this day. But my mother was never teased and I was never teased. Some people did have a hard time getting the pronunciation correct on the first try, but whatever.

Stick to your guns. Give your children names that they will hate when they're young but thank you for when they're older. Give them the beautiful but different name that MEANS something and has a cool story behind it. Trust me. I am that kid with the unusual but pretty awesome name.
technicolorgirl
by New Member on Nov. 22, 2017 at 12:42 AM


Quoting anotherandree: My name is Inga. When I was growing up, I wanted badly to be a Tiffany, Mary, or Karen. Something normal that I could find on a pen or mug at the store without having to special order it. My mother caught SO MUCH shit from everyone. My grandmother said the same things you mentioned that people said to you. I'm 41 and absolutely love my name. Yes, I still can't find things with even my initials to this day. But my mother was never teased and I was never teased. Some people did have a hard time getting the pronunciation correct on the first try, but whatever. Stick to your guns. Give your children names that they will hate when they're young but thank you for when they're older. Give them the beautiful but different name that MEANS something and has a cool story behind it. Trust me. I am that kid with the unusual but pretty awesome name.

You are absoutely right. sticking to my guns. 

GlitterInTheAir
by Bronze Member on Nov. 22, 2017 at 6:18 AM
I have an extremely uncommon name. I think, literally, like three other people in the country have my name. I HATED it growing up. I love it now.

Name baby what you want to name baby, but I would make sure it has an easy to pronounce, easy flow nick name.
loquaciousred
by Member on Nov. 22, 2017 at 4:01 PM
Honestly...fuck them. Choose names that you are happy with. Everyone will come around
newmelly2009
by Silver Member on Nov. 22, 2017 at 9:44 PM
1 mom liked this
Go with your ethnicity, I actually hate that we Americans always change the spelling of old school names that have history...hard to track that way..I love that my daughter has her dad's ethnic name spelled the right way that she can track back to her heritage if she wanted when she got older..Leila is her name and people always say lie-la but I wouldn't change a thing
luna321
by Bronze Member on Nov. 25, 2017 at 6:17 PM
Go with it! Do you have a certain letter you have to use? Or the most recent who died? Or are those covered so you have more flexibility? I ask because I have Jewish family who follow this tradition and there were very hard feelings when my mom did not use her aunts name on the first born after her death.
technicolorgirl
by New Member on Dec. 1, 2017 at 2:50 AM
1 mom liked this


Quoting luna321: Go with it! Do you have a certain letter you have to use? Or the most recent who died? Or are those covered so you have more flexibility? I ask because I have Jewish family who follow this tradition and there were very hard feelings when my mom did not use her aunts name on the first born after her death.

Yep, Z. Already covered, but, I've decided to still go with it in honor of my grandmother. And I've decided I don't care if people think my daughter's name is odd, culture comes first! 

B3autifulCha0s
by Bronze Member on Dec. 1, 2017 at 9:31 PM
1 mom liked this
We do names that are Biblical or biblically related for first names and family names for middle names.

There are a lot of “unique” bible names so it gets interesting. We’re having a hard time picking a boy name but I think we’ve got it. It’s defintely different but he has options for nicknames and can always use his middle name.
lyzzefrago
by Member on Dec. 3, 2017 at 8:45 PM

I would never allow someone to tell me to not name my child something that I want to, the name I'm choosing for a girl/if they are both girls are both odd names/spelled odd and although they will be able to be pronounced etc I'm not sure how people will react, the only person I've told my names to so far was my mom and Idc about her opinion she knows I'm stuck on them and she actually likes them. I personally can't really pronounce all those names lol but I'm not Jewish so why would I be able to! I'm all for NEVER using practicality with naming, my family has the boringist names EVER in the world and I hate it! lol

My name is Elizabeth, sister's is Allison, mom's is Jennifer, and dad's is Michael. Super stereotypical "white" names as my friends say. And neither of my parents are actually white my dad considers himself Latino (he's Puerto Rican and Italian) and my mom is half Asian. 

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