Pushing?

As gross and non-trancendent as this may sound, to me pushing out a baby was a lot like pooping. You push with pretty much the same muscles, only a lot harder. I was terrified of the pain too, but it wasn't as bad as I thought. The only thing I think might comfort her on that 1) plenty of woman have natural childbirths and then decide to do it again, so it can't be so bad and 2) there are pain relievers out there if she needs them.

riotgrrls description is right its what a lot of woman told me before I had my first and I had an epidural and there are a lot of horror stories with those but i must've had the best in the world cause ima get it again and this way you dont feel pain just pressure in my description it was like someone tickling my bladder real hard sounds weird but thats how i knew when to push and I had her out in 20 mins I am praying it goes that well this time. My best friend had three kids with no pain killers and she said it wasnt that bad and she forgot the pain when it was over anyways. I hope this was some help to your friend tell her its normal to freak out before your first but once she's there all she'll think about is seeing her baby.

yep, the poopy push!! lol
also my bf and doula told me that when the baby crowns it burns/alot of pressure /hurts worst then but to not freak out. just  relax, take a DEEP breathe and PUSH and the baby will come right out!!!  I did not have an epidural so i did feel the pressure and all and sure enough I felt it and took a deep breathe and out they came!!  the nurse also said that was the best thing to do!  saying that most girls freak out at the pressure/burning/pain and stop  for fear it will hurt worse but it doesn't! so you can either be in pain for a few seconds and PUSH or prolong the pain NOt push. I opted to push!! lol

This is going to sound really wierd, but tell her she'll know when the babies coming, because it will feel like the biggest shit she's ever had to take in her entire life.  People laugh at me when i say that but I'm so serious.  That's exactly what it felt like.  My best advice for her would also be, don't believe the hype.  I'm on my second pregnancy, but my first pregnancy I was terrified, because it seems like you when you are pregnant, all anyone has to tell you is horror stories about being pregnant.  This is going to be painful, that's going to be painful, blah blah blah.  I let other women scare me so bad I was terrfied when I went into labor.  Then I had my daughter and I just looked around like "That was it?  That's what they were complaining about it?"  Don't get me wrong, it was tough and it did hurt, but i was expecting something so much worse from the stories i had been told, that the tough parts didn't seem so hard.  So i guess i'm kind of glad they scared me half to death, it made the labor a little easier : )

As for knowing HOW to push, the most effective form of pushing is this
Take a DEEP breath, Hold it in
and push from your bottom, like you were pooping,  while your partner counts to 10 slowly, as if you were keeping time
let it out
Take another Deep breath, Hold it in
and push while your parther counts to 10
let it out
One more time!
Take a Deep breath, hold it in
and push like your poopin while your partner counts to 10
let it out
 and take another deep cleansing breath to relax
then you just wait for the next contraction and repeat, when you are pushing there should be no noise coming out of your mouth, your supposed to hold your breath, when you do this it gives you more force to push with.
Tell her she needs to practice this with her birth partner before for about a week, but dont actually push, just imitate the holding the breath and the counting,

3 pushes per contraction! Good luck!

i agree with wat everyone has said here. Dont listen t all of the horro stories about labor and delivery i did and freaked out and went to the point where i was saying i could not do it. but when it came right down to it yes it hurt but if u relax and stay calm and trust the people around then it is alot easier then if u freak out i figured that out by fighting at first and then later figuring out it easier to realx and go with the flow.

Quoting riotgrrl:

As gross and non-trancendent as this may sound, to me pushing out a baby was a lot like pooping. You push with pretty much the same muscles, only a lot harder. I was terrified of the pain too, but it wasn't as bad as I thought. The only thing I think might comfort her on that 1) plenty of woman have natural childbirths and then decide to do it again, so it can't be so bad and 2) there are pain relievers out there if she needs them.

I totally agree!! I am pregnant with my 3rd and am planning another all natural childbirth so just relax and don't stress. Many people will tell you horror stories but just let it roll right off your back. If it was that bad no one would have more than one child!!! Keep your outlook positive and all will be fine and once you hold them in your arms you forget all the pain. Nothing matters more than that baby!!!