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I need someone to help ease my mind!

Posted by on Dec. 17, 2008 at 8:49 AM
  • 10 Replies

Well, I am 36 weeks and 5 days pregnant with my second. I am scheduled for a c-section for Jan.2. I am scared to death. I went all natural with my first, but she was so big that it caused her and I a lot of problems, she was almost 10 pounds, I pushed for 31/2 hours, I ended up with two tears on of which was a 4 degree, major hemmroids, and she ended up with a broken collar bone and arm. I didn't even get to hold her or see her for the first 4 hours. Anyway, my doc said this baby will be big also and he strongly recommends that I have a c-section, but its just not what I had planned nor wanted. Partly because I am home for this pregnancy and I was hoping to be able to share this experience with my family because I couldn't with my first, it was just my husband and I and it really hurt because I have always seen the birth of a child special and exciting and we were alone.....Sorry, it still gets to me. My family and I were hoping that he would induce at 38 weeks to prevent the section and so I would have a chance to deliver regularly but he doesn't want to for the sake of the baby, which I truely understand. It made me feel awful for even asking because I would rather him come when he is ready. I just worry because I have my daughter at home and trying to function after having a section with a newborn, I wonder how am I going to do it and I have just heard awful stories about the pain and everything associated with having a section. I am just having a hard time dealing and coming to terms with this and I just need someone to I guess give me some words of wisdom or encouragement maybe. I am just a nervous wreck about the whole thing. Anyway, thanks for reading and I would appreciate if no one bashed. There is no need be for it.

by on Dec. 17, 2008 at 8:49 AM
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by on Dec. 17, 2008 at 8:53 AM

My first thought would have been to induce early so you could have him naturally, so dont feel bad.  I would be scared too if I had to have a C-section.  I wish I could help you!

by on Dec. 17, 2008 at 8:54 AM

I don't know anything about c-sections but have you thought about getting another opinion?  I'm not sure what I would do in your shoes, I move around so much that I don't have any attatchment to any one doctor.  I go where the insurance takes me.  I think I have heard of larger babies coming early  as they are usually developed but wow, if he is bigger then 10 lbs, that's scary. My sister was huge and my mom did it natural but that was a long time ago.  I would probably do what my doctor told me was best but if I had the strong discomfort that you have I might seek another opinion.  I know that was probably no help but hang in there.

by on Dec. 17, 2008 at 8:58 AM

I had a c-section with my first and i had no problems.  Hardly any pain but then again my nurses were great (there every 3 hours with more pain meds) I wouldn't be scared.  You just have to go into it with the right attitude.  Be positive relax and enjoy the experience.  You will be fine.  Good luck and let us know how it all goes.


by on Dec. 17, 2008 at 9:00 AM

Since there is no reliable way to predict a babies birth size i don't understand why the doctor wants you to have a planned c-section. Even ACOG does not advise c-section or induction for suspected large babies.

Have you looked into different birthing positions to make the birth a bit easier (being flat on your back is a horrible position to give birth in) and have you gotten a second opinion? It is your body and your baby and if you really don't want the section you don't have to go ahead with it!

by Bronze Member on Dec. 17, 2008 at 9:01 AM

I had a section with my first and will with this one also. The section was a breeze! The spinal hurt a bit, but after that I felt nothing! After about a week I was back on feet and back to normal after 2 weeks.


by on Dec. 17, 2008 at 9:09 AM

I have had two other opinions on this and they both agree with my doc now. They said he is already measuring 2 1/2 weeks early and I know my due date is correct. My doc told me that the choice is mine on the section but if I was to end up in the same situation as my first it would be worse to heal from verses the section. My husband also agrees with him because he knows the damage that was done last time. Its just hard for me to come to terms with it. If I don't opt for the section he said he would let me go full term which means more than likely I will end up in the same situation as last time. I just don't know what to do.

by on Dec. 17, 2008 at 10:28 AM

if you are so freaked out by the thought of having a c-esection then dont schedule one. especially since you dont have anyway of knowing for sure what size your baby really is.  i would just let labor happen naturally and if you ended up with one, then at least you tried.  you should look for a lot of different positions for pushing, besides laying on your back.  like can really widen your pelvic for the baby.  if you are afraid of tearing you could try some perineum massage. 


by on Dec. 17, 2008 at 11:37 AM

I had an emergency c-section with my first (10 lb, 11 oz!) and a planned section w/the second (a mere 10 lbs!).  I had a verticle incision rather than the lower transverse they typically use b/c of the size of the babies.  The planned section went A LOT smoother than the emergency.  I was able to have an epidural the 2nd time.  While I was freaking out when getting that -- b/c well, it just made me nervous -- everything went just fine.  My first daughter was 2 1/2 when I had the second daughter & so I also had a toddler at home.  But ex-hubby was never a help & I managed ok on my own.  After 2 weeks, I felt just fine.  Did not even have much pain after the first couple days.  I was able to breastfeed both daughters from the day of their birth.  That was a lil tricky b/c of the incision, but doable.  I too, regretted not having  natural, but do what is best for you & the baby.  Having a c-section won't make you any less of a mother! 

by on Dec. 17, 2008 at 11:43 AM

This is my story almost exactly. My C-section is tomorrow and the reasons are the same. My last baby was big and now has a life long injury due to his birth. I decided not to risk this baby having a injury as well. I'm doing this for the baby not for myself as our children should come first anyways. You have a medical reason and it sounds neccesary. Vaginal or c-section does not make us a better parent. As for recovery... it's better than having an infant in a cast. Good luck to you

by on Dec. 17, 2008 at 11:44 AM

My c-section was a breeze too.  I had a little pain, but meds took care of that and I was also able to breast feed my son.  I wouldn't worry so much about the csection, but the damage you could do trying to have your baby naturally.  If your first had a broken collar bone and arm, just imagine what could happen this time around if this baby is larger.  Just concentrate on getting your little one here safely and the rest will be okay.  Good luck!



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