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Not pregnancy related but need advice...it's important

Posted by on Feb. 5, 2009 at 12:36 PM
  • 4 Replies

My mom dated a guy for about 3 1/2 years and after all of us (her family) trying to get her to end it for 3 1/2 years, she does. The guy was seeing another woman the entire time and my mom now hates him. Well My son is nearly 3 years old..so this man much to my dislike has been around for my babys entire life thus far and despite my telling her not to my mother brought him around my son and even told my son that he was papaw. I hated this and even threatned to keep my son away from her if she didn't stop bringing the man around my son.  She never listened and i wasn't really going to seperate my son and his mamaw, so my son grew into this thinking this man was papaw....well they've been split up for months now and he sent me a message last night asking if he could see my son. I told him that would be fine, that my son was asking for him any way. Well when I tell my mom about this she blows up and tells me to not allow it because her ex is only trying to get to her. Well when I explained I wasn't going to keep my son from his papaw, and that it was her fault he thought her ex was his papaw she started crying and told me she never wanted to see me again that i hurt her to often for her to stay in my life and to involve her ex all I wanted she didn't care. She never wanted to see any of us again.....what am I suppose to do?

by on Feb. 5, 2009 at 12:36 PM
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Replies (1-4):
mommy2clarke
by on Feb. 5, 2009 at 1:06 PM

Don't let it get to you. That's all she's trying to do. She will get over it, believe me. I've put up with crap like this too many times to count.

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carolinesmom929
by on Feb. 5, 2009 at 1:16 PM

I think you are doing the right thing. Especially if he acted like your sons grandpa. That is one thing I wish adults could just get over. Kids don't asked to be put in the middle. If my husband and I ever split (not that it is ever going to happen) i know even if it was very hurtful I wouldn't put my children in the middle. He has always been a GREAT father. It seems like your son and him had a connection if your son is asking about him.

mom23boys679
by on Feb. 5, 2009 at 1:20 PM
Your mother has to understand your son has built an emotional bond with this man. She needs to put aside her selfish reasons why she doesn't want her grandson around him and realize that although he may be young, he's built a relationship with someone and to rip him away would be cruel. She needs to walk a mile in your little babys shoes and understand.
Mell-belle
by on Feb. 5, 2009 at 1:25 PM

I think that you are doing the right thing. And your mother is just being immature. I was always close to my husbands nieces and nephews. They would spend weekends at our house and everything, and even though we are divorced. I still make it a point to see them. I divorced my husband, not them kids. I don't want them to think that I just walked out on them too! So I completely agree with you on this one!

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