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Posted by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:15 PM
  • 13 Replies

Okay so I scheduled my appointment for this coming monday.  I will be almost 19 weeks.  When I went to my regular OBGYN last week she said "the ultrasound isn't to determine the sex and if they can't find it we are not going to do another one."  We're not going to be in a financial position to pay for 3D ultrasound for probably another month or so and I don't want to wait!! 

Also I went to ER last weekend didn't know what was wrong, turns out I had UTI but they did ultrasound and tech didn't tell me anything about baby.  I didn't even get to see the baby.  He showed me the heart rate.

So my questions are:

Has anyone gone and not been able to determine the sex?

Why would my doctor say something like that?  Do they not tell you the sex at your appointment?

Does the ultrasound tech always look for the sex and ask you if you want to know?

Why would the tech when I had my ultrasound at the ER not say ANYTHING?

Thank you to whoever reads this and responds.


Lilypie Kids birthday Ticker

Lilypie Expecting a baby Ticker
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:15 PM
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by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:18 PM

i was always told that checking the gender was part of the major ultrasound done at 20 weeks, if you wanted to know what you were having.  I dotnt think they normally get you in a second time just for gender though. Good Luck!

by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:21 PM

1. Im sure there have been ladies that have went and werent able to find out. Where I am from there are hospitals that WILL NOT tell you the sex of your baby. Its some sort of policy they have in place.

2. Your doctor probably told you that because the u/s is to check the anatomy and make sure baby is healthy. The soul purpose of the u/s is not to tell you the sex of the baby, and in some cases its not even close to a top priority.

3. Im sure the tech usually sees whether or not the baby is a boy or a girl. If i were you I would make sure to tell the tech right away that you are very interested in knowing the sex, so if they could take a look it would be very much appreciated. Perhaps the tech isnt as much of a stick in the mud as your doc?

4. The tech in the ER was probably just checkin to make sure baby was alright, and thats as far as they wanted to go woth the u/s. I can guarantee if there was something wrong with your baby you would definitely know by now.

Before you go to your u/s drink some apple juice. That way it gives the baby a nice burst of energy and it will make it easier for the tech to be able to find the sex. Im sure youll findout. try not to worry. ~kristin~


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by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:23 PM

At the ER they aren't allowed to tell you because they can get in trouble with your dr, my midwife had to tell me by my last 2 dd's that I was have a girl by their butts cause they wouldn't show their lady parts, he was right both times. And the tech that has to check and make sure if everything is ok always asked me if my midwife told me what I was having most of the time he has already told me and she would confirm.

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by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:25 PM

The most important part of the ultrasound is to make sure everything is okay with baby...finding out the sex is just a bonus part! ....But I do find that odd that your dr. did say that ...I believe at 19 weeks you will be able to tell the sex...we haven't found out the sex at either of my kids ultrasounds so I can't tell you how it goes! xoxo

by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:26 PM

She was saying to you that they do try and see gender at  your 19wk ultrasound -they look at the whole baby how its growing etc, 

But soemtimes you cant tell gender because of the babies position and they dont do a second ultrasound jus to determine gender  For instance I am now 25 weeks and i d not know wha Im having beacause  at my 19wk ultrasound they couldnt tell -my baby had his/her legs crossed... the tech was really nice and tried to help me get the baby to move but he/she wouldnt so we didnt get to know.  There was nothing wrong with my baby- thank God so they have no reason for another ultrasound. I can however choose to pay for the 3D ultrasound which I am doing March 9th. Hopefully the baby will be in a better postion.

by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:29 PM

With my first pregnanccy they were really strict about having to many ultrasounds. My first scheduled ultrasound to determine sex the tech wasnt to sure and said boy but immediatley said no its moving to much we'll schedule you one more. So i went back and same thing. The baby would not stay still and all we could see was the back no parts. So when i went to my Drs apt i told her and she said well we can only have two so i going to send you down to u/s but tell them we couldnt find a heart beat. So we went and the tech wouldnt tell me the sex just said well i sure found a heart beat and sent us on our way. We werent able to find out the sex till she was born. Which we wanted to know so bad but couldnt afford. With my second im now in a diffrent State and the dr here said ill definitly find out the babys sex. She'll make sure of that. So that makes me very happy. m scheduled to find out Feb 24th. Good luck to you and hopefully you get to find out.

by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:34 PM

Has anyone gone and not been able to determine the sex? At my appointment on Thursday they couldn't really clearly tell what it was

Why would my doctor say something like that?  Do they not tell you the sex at your appointment? I'm not sure why your dr would say that, they usually will look for it.

Does the ultrasound tech always look for the sex and ask you if you want to know? The ultrasound tech asked me if I wanted to know and she looked for it

Why would the tech when I had my ultrasound at the ER not say ANYTHING? I think the tech at the ER would only be making sure that the baby is healthy

I hope they'll be able to tell for you because it's so aggrivating wanting to know and not knowing.

pregnancy week by week


by Bronze Member on Feb. 14, 2009 at 8:00 AM

Sounds like your dr is just being a jerk!! Thats just a really mean thing to say. Is he mean like that all the time?? If so I would look into switching dr's. You should have a good relationship with the person who you are trusting to deliver your baby.

As for the ER...they are not trained to do anything but a really really basic ultrasound. They are not allowed to tell you anything. Even if they found something wrong with the baby...your dr would tell you. I was in L&D for a non-stress test and they did an ultrasound to check my fluids. While she was doing the ultrasound I asked how big the baby was and she said she was not trained to know that......

Anyways I wouldnt worry about it too much. The majority of the time the tech can see the gender at some point of the ultrasound. Of course it does happen that the baby is too stubborn but in 45 minutes MOST babies show it.


                 expecting girl                                      baseball
            Makayla  due 2/23/09!!                                  Matthew Dylan 3/9/05

by on Feb. 14, 2009 at 8:08 AM

well with my son i had to have an extra ultrasound 2wks early to look at my gullbladder, that came back fine but she was very nice and let me see the baby too, he has unfortunatly turned the wrong way so we couldnt see what he was but she said that thats not really her specialty so she couldnt promise finding out anyways. The first lady should have been nice and showed u but since it wasnt the porpuse and u were in the er thats prob why she didnt. But bcuz of insurance companies they cant keep doing ultrasounds so u can find out what the baby is and it isnt the purpose of the ultrasound either its to get measurements on the growth, but they will ask u if u want to know if the baby co-operates. i was kinda disapointed when i found out my son was a boy bcuz she asked me if i wanted to know i said yes and then in like a monatone voice shes like deffinatly looks like a by then didnt say anythin else till it was over i felt like i was on an assembly line in and out and she did let me see anythin as she was doin it or say this is this or anythin she printed out my pics and that was that. i wish u luck on finding out what it is my advice give ur lo a pep talk b4 thats what i did i said if u dont show urself ur gonna end up with all pink stuff no matter what sure enough his legs were wide open lol 

by on Feb. 14, 2009 at 8:22 AM
Hello, Firstly I want to say that when you go to your 20 week appointment, that yes they are suppose to look and try and tell you what you are having if you want to know. But the MAIN reason you go is to check and make sure that NOTHING is wrong with the baby. No extra fluid behind the head, no extra baby. LOL! but yes, they SHOULD try and look for you if it is your desire. And as far as the ER, I would have slapped somebody. They are suppose to listen to the Heartbeat of the baby to make sure it is doing well and the heart beat is strong. Also to make sure the baby is moving around okay. No matter if you had a UTI or a eye infection. The baby is suppose to be checked on. With my pregnancy, I can remember about 3 different times I had to go to the ER and each time the first thing that they did was to give me an ultrasound. Do NOT let anyone mistreat you or make you feel miserable. Talk up and demand the ultrasound, even if you say it would make you feel more comfortable if you could see the baby move for yourself and hear it's heartbeat. & enjoy this pregnancy cause you may miss it, like I do! Oh yeah and about them not saying anything, sometimes doctors can be snody and downright ignorant because they hold that title....
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