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* So this is me, 18 weeks pregnant 6 days pregnant, With my third, taken today. Those are my regular jeans, not even maternity! * Thank all you ladies for your support! It really makes me feel better!
So heres the story. This is my third baby, I work really hard after each pregnancy to loose my weight and get down to prepregnancy size (this takes months ladies, I am not one of those people the fat just melts off of after birth! I have to work hard, because I breastfeed, so I don't diet)
Well, I am 5'2 and 115 pounds. I lost all my weight and was in great shape before i found out I was pregnant again. I am 18weeks 5days and just now starting to show. I have not gained even a pound. obviously I don't have a weight issue.
But she every single time i see her, (MIL) she looks at me and says "wow, you sure have gotten FAT!." She says this continually. Each time I see her. Each time It catches me off guard. I have no idea what to say. She has done this with all of my pregnancies. And even makes mean joke and comments when I'm not!
It would be easier if she were fat, I could come up with a SMart A^^ comment then. But she is a stick. She is 5'2 and maybe a little over 100lbs. And really good looking for a woman in her mid forties. I hate her.
She makes me feel so bad about myself, and I can't talk to her about it because then it would look like I was being too sensitive, because after all, "its just a joke!" But it really puts me down. I mean I worked hard to get into shape, and all she ever does, is "joke" about how fat I am or "joke" about my body in some other way. Btw she never exercises, the reasn she is so skinny is because she only allows herself one meal a day, if that.
I know a good humored sarcastic joke, and this isn't that. She is a catty woman, and will try to draw attention to how wonderful she looks compared to everyone else. She is in a constant state of competition.
So just once I want to have a smart A$$ remark to come back with, But I am not a smart a$$ by nature so if anyone could help???
My g-ma was the same way. I told her I could lose weight. Ugly is forever.
My own mother is like this....hence we live over 500 miles apart LOL
Here's my 2 cents:
MIL: "Wow, you got fat, didn't you?"
You: "Well, if I could tuck my boobs into the top of my jeans too, I'd be just as skinny as you." Sweet Smile. Walk away.
What? Too harsh? *angelic smile*
I would just say, " Well I hope so...I have a half grown baby in there." You know your not fat, so maybe if you "agree" with her, she will zip it!!
Before she even has anything to say I would say "have you put on some weight?" or if she said something first then I would say "I would starve myself too but I'd be putting your unborn grandchild in danger."
My mother gives her 3 and 4 year old grandchildren diet soda because she doesn't want them getting fat.
I have no idea what you look like or what she does but i am going to assume since this is your 3rd baby and that she is nasty skinny that you have a bangin rack and she has none to be seen. So if this is the case, next time she says that just reply.." but isn't my rack just awesome!!!"
I have a feeling she's just insecure. My childrens g-ma likes to comment things about my weight when ever i drop my son off to see his dad. But I just laugh because she's not quite 5 feet tall and somewhere 300 lbs :D
i just say I could look worse and just stare at her moomoo :D
Dealing with my own family is harder, there is no such thing as a perfect body with them, I'm either fat or too skinny... can't win, so i just try to make me happy.
HAHA sounds like my mom...... :( wait that isn't funny is it.... I kow how you feel, after I had my son I couldnt seem to lose my weight and ever since my mom has been skinnier and prettier than me (its really just not fair ::sigh::) She is the same way as your MIL she tells me all the time that I need to loose my weight because if I don't my husband (who is a very good looking man) is going to cheat on me or leave me for someone skinnier. She also only allows herself to eat once maybe twice a day.
My mom does it out of warped love though. My dad cheated on her after she had my brother and while she was preggo with me so she is just looking out for me. Maybe someting similar happened to her and she just doesn't feel comfortable sharing that info with you. Just call her a skinny bitch and get it over with lol, thats what I do to my mom (she knows her opinion isn't welcome when it has anything to do with the way I look).
I can't believe she calls you fat your pregnant thats just BS. My inlaws say it to me too, well I don't exactly don't have a mother in law (she died when my husband was like 8) but my husbands grandma has always tooken care of him so yeah thats pretty much my mother in law.. Anyways, she is always looking at me and commenting "how I'm getting fatter" and it really pisses me off.. I can't believe anybody would be so mean to say that.. I never lost any of the baby weight with my first but I was extremley skinny before I got pregnant with my daughter and now it's hard for me to lose weight... But I am working my butt off after my son to lose this weight.. BUT I'm sorry I don't know you can say to your MIL I just ignore mine..
I agree, if you come up with some witty comment as good as it will feel, you will have stooped to her level. Not only that, if its not natural for you to be sarcastic....its going to be hard to pull off. If I were you, I would look confused when she said it and say "really? well I am pregnant, its going to happen" and say it EVERYTIME she says it. That way she will get that you arent amused and you are remaining tactful.
Quoting LuckyClown:
ok, I think insulting her back would bring you down to her level, you have so much more tact than her so some of the bitter comments others are suggesting don't seem to fit your personality..
I would keep the joking tone and simply say - 'well your son seems to really like my curves'
I do also like that comment about the obgyn telling you you could stand to gain a few pounds.
whatever your MIL is wrestling with (she probably is feeling conscious of her age to be honest- because otherwise you two sound close in size) is not your problem, you just keep your head up with the knowledge that you are the better person.
Hmm perhaps you should just say something simple..
MIL : Wow youre getting fat.
YOU: (with a huge smile on your face) Bite me.
OR
Mil : Wow youre getting fat.
YOU: (also with a huge smile on your face, and maybe a little giggle) and youre looking old??
Then just walk away.. good times.
BTW.. I think your mil's secret to staying thin is crack.. because there is NO FREAKIN WAY that you look even close to chubby.. it has to be the crack talking.. lol. ~Kristin~
I think you look great, first of all, and secondly, next time she says anything, just wink and tell her that her son is obviously loving you the way you are. then add something about he likes a little cushin' for the pushin....and walk away. :-)
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