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EMERGENCY!!! Super Dilemma!!!

Posted by on Jul. 5, 2009 at 3:04 AM
  • 26 Replies

Ok, so this is my story.

My husband and I just moved to California from Germany because of the Air Force. We are obviously not getting paid as much because we are not overseas anymore. I am forced to get a job now which I don't mind because I am tired of sitting at home. Anyway, I got this job interview at an office that specializes in home care for the elderly. So basically my job requires me to take them to appointments, remind them to take their medicine, sometimes when I take them to appointments it requires me to lift them from their wheelchairs and sit them in my car, which obviously is straining myself to lift another person. I basically got the job, I just have to go for training. My dilemma is I JUST FOUND OUT THAT I AM PREGNANT!!! Totally not expected that. Now my question is...should I tell them? My husband is telling me not to until I start showing, but I keep telling myself that the first trimester is always the most critical and I am going to have to strain myself picking people up and stuff. So what should I do? I don't want to complain to my husband because I don't want him to think that I am backing out of the job and just being plain lazy, buuuutttt we really need the money and it's a job that pays $14 an hour and it's also a full- time job. He's also getting deployed for 8 months so I want to make as much money as I can to buy stuff for the baby.

Please, PLEASE help me, I feel like no one understands where I am coming from.

by on Jul. 5, 2009 at 3:04 AM
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by on Jul. 5, 2009 at 3:17 AM

If you really want the job be sure to talk it over with your OB. It's best to get clearance from your OB before doing anything to terribly strenuous on your body. and if you are concerned about work getting upset about you being pregnant, i dont know how it is in Cali but here in Florida its a right to work state so they can fire you for any reason they see fit. I don't think Cali is that way but I would still wait until you hit 12 weeks to say anything to anyone about being pregnant unless you are deemed high risk and then you probably have no choice but to tell them because you will be putting unnecessary strain on your body.

But, before making any decision, definitely talk to your OB about it. :]

Pregnancy ticker
My baby girl! Coming soon!
by on Jul. 5, 2009 at 3:19 AM

Personally I agree with you, and you should tell them. You shouldn't be doing any lifting over I think 28 lbs while your pregnant, and the further you get the less you should lift. Even lift a short distance could cause problems. I think you should be safe and tell them, they can not not hire you because of you being pregnant, that would fall under discrimination, I think, but I could be wrong. Good luck what ever happens and congrats!


by on Jul. 5, 2009 at 3:34 AM

Found this for you about Pregnancy Discrimination

Pregnancy Discrimination

Pregnancy discrimination in the workplace and other aspects of employment, is prohibited under the Federal Pregnancy Discrimination Act of 1978.

The Pregnancy Discrimination Act prohibits employment discrimination on the basis of pregnancy, childbirth, abortion and related medical conditions.

Childbirth is a valid reason to take family or medical leave under the Family and Medical Leave Act (FMLA) for both the mother and father. Such leave is typically called maternity leave for the mother and paternity leave for the father.

Private- and public-sector employers with 15 or more employees are bound by the Pregnancy Discrimination Act, as are employment agencies and labor unions.

Those bound by the Act cannot rightfully discriminate against pregnant employees and job candidates in the workplace or any aspect of employment, including hiring, firing, promotion and benefits.

The Pregnancy Discrimination Act was an amendment to Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964, which prohibits several types of employment discrimination.

Pregnancy discrimination is generally considered to be a form of illegal sex discrimination under the Acts. (See also Sexual Harassment in the Workplace.) The Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) enforces both Acts.

States and municipalities may enact laws that are equivalent to the Federal Pregnancy Discrimination Act. Such laws are enforced by state and local, EEOC equivalents. Depending on the circumstances, employees are protected by whichever law at the Federal, state or local level has the most generous provisions.

According to the New York Times, "maternal profiling" was a new buzzword in 2007, coined by to mean "Employment discrimination against a woman who has, or will have, children."

If you reasonably believe that your employer has discriminated against you because of pregnancy, childbirth or a related medical condition, then you may file a pregnancy discrimination charge with the EEOC. Filing a charge will cause the EEOC to act on your behalf or preserve your right to seek relief through a private, pregnancy discrimination lawsuit.

In fact, you, or your lawyer or other representative must file a charge with the EEOC, to preserve your right under the Pregnancy Discrimination Act to seek relief through a private lawsuit.

To properly handle its caseload, the EEOC aggressively pursues only the most compelling of the thousands of discrimination charges it receives annually. If it doesn't take your case to court, then you may request a "right-to-sue" letter that entitles you to file a pregnancy discrimination lawsuit in Federal court.

Consequently, it might be a good idea to consult a pregnancy discrimination lawyer before filing a charge with the EEOC. A lawyer will help you to properly collect evidence and file a more compelling charge in legalese, to increase your chances that the EEOC lawyers will see it your way. Lawyers often take pregnancy discrimination cases on contingency.

Whether you file a pregnancy discrimination charge or consult a lawyer first, don't delay too long; a statute of limitations applies.

An employer cannot rightfully retaliate against an employee who exercises her rights under the Pregnancy Discrimination Act, such as filing a pregnancy discrimination charge with the EEOC, consulting a lawyer, filing a private lawsuit in court or participating in related proceedings. An employer also cannot rightfully retaliate against employees who testify as witnesses during the proceedings.

For more information about the Pregnancy Discrimination Act, read Pregnancy Discrimination at the Web site of the EEOC.


by on Jul. 5, 2009 at 3:36 AM

Wow!! Thank you! That was really useful!

by on Jul. 5, 2009 at 4:09 AM

Just make sure that the employer has 15 or more employees otherwise the pregnancy discrimination act isn't in effect, it doesn't matter what state your in. Hope it all helps you out :)


by on Jul. 5, 2009 at 8:46 AM
I would wait til you for sure have the job then tell them. Otherwise they could give the position to someone else and say they were just better qualified.
by on Jul. 5, 2009 at 9:37 AM

I would definitely tell them, it is possible maybe they would be able to put you in a different position that is less straining, or if nothing else you will know you need to look for a different job. I don't like BSing people, especially employers and I am sure they would appreciate your honesty.If they don't keep you, at least you would not have wasted your time training for something you aren't even going to do.

The same thing actually happened to me but it was an office job so it wasn't an issue. I went through a temp agency and got a job that paid $11.50 (which was great for that area) 40 hours a week and the same day I got the job I found out I was pregnant. I was so worried about it but on my first day I told my supervisor because I didn't want to waste mine and their time even though I desperately needed the job, and he was really nice about it. I only worked there for 4 months because it was a temp thing but they were very understanding of doctors appointments and things like that. So yeah I would tell them. Good luck! Congrats on the pregnancy too!!

 Pregnancy Ticker
by on Jul. 5, 2009 at 9:57 AM

I was a post-op orthopaedic nurse when I got pregnant with my DD.  I lifted what I had to in order to perform my duties without going on limited duty.  I did get a lot of help though.  See what your Dr says.  If a person is over 40 pounds and you have to lift them to do your job, the person should have or the company should provide a hoyer lift.  Good luck and CONGRATS!

Madeline 5/12/04   Kiernan 10/31/05  ^Ezra^ 11/26/08
Pregnancy ticker

by on Jul. 5, 2009 at 10:47 AM

Lifting is generally fine while you are pregnant unless you are high-risk.  I am a physical therapist in a hospital and do it every time I work.  As long as you are trained in the correct way to move people, it really isn't a big deal.  I would ask your MD to be sure he doesn't see anything wrong.  Then, I would tell your employer.  That way if you ever do come across a client that you don't feel comfortable lifting/moving, you can tell them and they will hopefully understand.  Good luck!!!

blowing bubbles              toddler girl             expecting baby

Abigail 5/17/06    Isabelle 10/17/07        Baby #3 Due Dec


If you want to make a good investment, take the afternoon off and play with your kids. - paraphrased from Ben Stein

by on Jul. 5, 2009 at 11:38 AM

also, just wanted to add that i think the thing with lifting is in the third trimester, when lifting MAY become a problem, since yu just found out you are expecting, i doubt it would affect you now..  also, i thought that spouses get extra loot while husbands are away overseas.  thats how it was for my husband not sure about your situation though.  just stating that b/c than you wouldnt have to try so hard to save up b/c youll be getting more in.  GL

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