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how many ppl want to be there while you are waiting to give birth??? vent

Posted by on Aug. 28, 2009 at 11:46 AM
  • 53 Replies

Personally I do not think it is neccessary to have your whole family sitting around waiting for the baby. I keep telling ppl that I will call when I am for sure going to have her ( i see no point in telling the world im on the way to the hospital just to call back and say false alarm) but ppl (mostly my grama) keep saying NO i want you to call me when u leave for the hospital and I keep saying that I don't want everyone there while I am dialating, waiting to push and all that KWIM?

Of course I will have my mom call when the event is about to happen but that could take HOURS and mostly I don't want ppl in and out of the room while Im waiting for the pushing stage. At the child birth class the lady was saying you can have 5ppl in the room at any point up to going into the delivery room then it's only 2. I'm thinking 5ppl!! no way in hell I want 5ppl in there watching me have contrations!!

Anyway if this is your first what do you plan to do and if it's not your first what did you do with previous births? Please help. I don't want to hurt ppl's feelings but I am the one in labor!

oh also apparently bc I feel this way my other grama said she will just wait til I get out of the hospital to come see us! That is not what I was trying to do I just don't want ppl watching me ! ugh

thanks for letting me vent

by on Aug. 28, 2009 at 11:46 AM
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by on Aug. 28, 2009 at 11:48 AM

 I have the grandparents and my siblings that is it no one else.  everyone wants to be there but I said no.  I know that my parents want to be there and my siblings are going in the birthing room with me so that is basically it.  I told everyone they can wait till I have her and if they dont like it I really dont care because they are not the ones having the baby and I want to be as comfortable as possible.

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by on Aug. 28, 2009 at 11:50 AM

when i had dd, i was induced, so EVERYBODY knew exactly when it was going to start. so there was a total of about 10 people there waiting, it seemed like alot more. when it was time to start pushing though, i kicked everyone out except my mom (she was my 'helper' because dh was deployed). and i did not allow cameras of any sort into that room. it was funny, stepmom tried to come in and take a pic  of me, i gave her the nastiest go to hell look and told her 'dont you even fucking think about it.'

one thing about birth... you can say what you want and be as bitchy as you want because nobody's going to hold it against you!

pregnancy due date
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by on Aug. 28, 2009 at 11:52 AM

With my first I called everyone and told them I was going to the hospital. My water broke at the mall one day and I didnt have him til 23 hours later. I only had immediate family come in and out of the room. My mom, dad, inlaws and grandparents. That was it. Everyone else just waited til after I had him to come visit. I completely understand how you feel. It was kinda uncomfortable at times but Im glad I had the support because I was in so much pain.


Mommy to Kagen****born June 12th 2007

Expecting another boy, Brayden, *******due September 30, 2009

Married to my Hubby for 2 years*****since February 10th 2007

by on Aug. 28, 2009 at 11:56 AM

 I suppose I'm the opposite, I don't think i'll mind having people coming in and out, only family though. I don't want all my friends there or anything but I know I want my mom, and her sisters and my best friend there. but if my grandma were to show up I don't think I'd mind. but when it comes to delivery it'll just be dh and my mom most likely. but I think having my aunts there will distract me from the pain lol. and i figure if the rest of them want to sit in the waiting room for 10 hours be my guest lol. I can't decide that for them, as far as being in the room I don't think I'll have more than 3 people in there at once because that'll be too much.  and this is my first

by on Aug. 28, 2009 at 11:57 AM

This is our first and I am allowed 3 people while laboring...and 3 people in the room for delivery.

I dont mind my immediate family being there while I labor, but the delivery part is just for me and my husband.

~ Michelle

by on Aug. 28, 2009 at 11:59 AM

I hear ya Mama!!! I feel the same way. This is my first baby, and I know for sure my Mom and fiance will be in the room when I am delivering, so I am sure them two at least will be in the room while I am waiting. I dont want a lot of people in the room while I am screaming in pain, but if I feel up to it, once I have the epidural I think I will let people come in a see me (close family members...his mom/dad, my mom/dad) for a little bit. But it is completely your choice, and if it seems like it or not, I am sure people will understand!


by on Aug. 28, 2009 at 12:06 PM

When I had DD i had only my DH and my mom in the room the whole time.  To be honest I didnt even want my mom in the room I only wanted it to be me and dh, but once the time came I wanted my mommy! LOL... and i think it will be the same thing this time around..

by on Aug. 28, 2009 at 12:07 PM

with my first child my husband was away in the military so it was my mom, aunt and uncle! thank god there was a snow storm bc if not everyone wouldve been there! my SIL, FIL, MIL, BIL, and all of my family (5bro & 1sis) and it was still to hectic with those 3 people in there.  so the 2nd time i told everyone i would call when i had her, and they didnt like that, esp my mother! but it was a much better atmosphere and it went way smoother bc i wasnt being crowded by everyone.... i even unplugged my phone.  but this time i think it will be the same, just me and daddy.  its your decision and if you dont want a ton of people there they have to deal with it... you dont need to explain to anyone.  goodluck!

by on Aug. 28, 2009 at 12:14 PM

I had friends and family come in and out until i was tired, sick and just not up to ppl coming anymore.

Then i had nurses keep ppl out. I called my parents and they called everyone else when I was ready to push and they waiting in the waiting room- just the nurses, me and my hubby were there (yes, no dr) lmao she didn't make it in time.

My hubby announced the baby being born and that everything was fine with me and baby, we had a few mintues with baby alone before allowing family to join in.

This time around will be the same, BUT we'll have more time with baby before everyone floods in.

by on Aug. 28, 2009 at 12:22 PM

This is my first pregnancy.  I have had a lot of people saying that they wanted to be called as soon as I head into the hospital.  That they all want to be there.  Well, I told them I would not be doing that.  I only want one or two people there with me.  My husband and my coach.  My husband doesn't do well in hospitals so I need someone there to support me.  If people want to come in they can just wait in the waiting room or wait until afterwards.  I do not want people walking in and out of the room before and I def. don't want a lot of people in there while I'm giving birth.  I know it sounds harsh but I am a very private person and I think that this experience should be only with my husband and myself (and the coach if my husband gets sick).  

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