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I can't get him to stop!

Posted by on Feb. 20, 2010 at 3:08 PM
  • 14 Replies

My 2 y/o DS has recently started this new thing. When he's doing something he's not supposed to and I tell him no, whether I'm raising my voice or not, he hits himself! Both hands, as hard as he can, in the stomach. I don't know where he picked it up! We don't ever hit him. Time out has always been the preferred punishment. Now, he's taken it up a notch and will lift his shirt. At first we would tell him not to do it. He didn't stop. So then we tried ignoring him. Nope, he would keep doing it until we paid attention to him. I was hoping it would eventually stop, but we went to the department of human services to drop off an app. He started wandering so I told him to come back by me. He starts hitting himself! I was mortified.
Any suggestions?!

by on Feb. 20, 2010 at 3:08 PM
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Replies (1-10):
TristansMom440
by on Feb. 20, 2010 at 3:13 PM

Hmmmm.....I was gonna suggest ignoring it, but I guess that hasn't worked.  Here's a BUMP for you, though.

Kellyjude1
by on Feb. 20, 2010 at 4:15 PM

 My son is 4 and I have the same problem..lol.  If I tell him no or place him in time out sometimes he will hit himself.  I have been reading on the internet and found some interesting information.  Apparently they have not learned how to handle their frustation or anger so they take it out on themselves.  There are some techniques like if you are angry take deep breaths to try and calm down.  One other suggestions was try to get them to talk of their feelings.

4time-mom
by on Feb. 20, 2010 at 5:14 PM

All I can think of is when he's misbehaving and you need to tell him to stop, drop what you're doing, go to him, hold both of his arms between the elbow & wrist, and then tell him no - holding his arms will mean he can't hit himself. Hold on to him for a little bit so he can't run off & hit himself after, and if he does, hold him (hug-style) so he can't and tell him it makes you sad when he hits himself. HTH!

krystlewv
by on Feb. 20, 2010 at 5:37 PM

 I dont have any suggestions, but big hugs to you! My little one does this occasionally as well.

mummaof2lilboys
by on Feb. 20, 2010 at 9:23 PM

I would LOVE it if he could tell me his feelings! He turned 2 the day after Christmas and is saying at most 10 words. I'm a SAHM and I work with him everyday trying to get him to talk. He knows animal sounds and he can say words like "Mumma" "DadDad" "Blue" (every color is blue!) and "Key" He doesn't have a hearing problem because he listens and what not. The pedi wants me to take him to a specialist :(

Quoting Kellyjude1:

 My son is 4 and I have the same problem..lol.  If I tell him no or place him in time out sometimes he will hit himself.  I have been reading on the internet and found some interesting information.  Apparently they have not learned how to handle their frustation or anger so they take it out on themselves.  There are some techniques like if you are angry take deep breaths to try and calm down.  One other suggestions was try to get them to talk of their feelings.


Kellyjude1
by on Feb. 21, 2010 at 7:16 PM

  It is hard to get them to talk out their feelings at 2.  I have now tried to just gently pull my son's arms away and distract him letting him know it is okay to be angry but not ok to hit himself.  I try not to make too much attention over him hitting himself.  I think sometimes with my son he is trying to take my attention from saying no, to getting a reaction of feeling sorry for him when he hits himself. 

Olivia213
by on Feb. 21, 2010 at 9:59 PM

My DS was hitting himself for a little while - but it did not appear to be out of anger/frustration.  He appeared to be doing it randomly.  For better or worse, we chose to put him in time out.  With the logic that since we were using time outs to let him know what other behavior was unacceptable why wouldn't it work for this.  Always, made sure to tell him that hitting himself was unacceptable and this was a time out behavior.  He stopped fairly quick. 

Not sure if this will work for you  - but good luck!

asesnick1
by on Feb. 21, 2010 at 10:10 PM

If he is not talking much and is also hitting himself, I would seriously consider taking him to the specialist.  I don't want to scare you, but it could be a developmental issue.  It is very common in kids who aren't able to express themselves in words to take out frustrations on themselves.  Please don't take this like I am saying there is something wrong with your son, it could be nothing, but I think it is better to be safe about these things, especialy if your pediatrician suggested it.  My son was almost diagnosed with an ASD, at 15 months because of a regression.  We were able to get everything under control because we found it early.  I just think it is better to be overly cautious with things like this.  Does he have any other behaviors or medical issues?  My son had/has digestive issues as well, that turned out to play a role.

collinsmommy_06
by on Feb. 21, 2010 at 10:14 PM

I don't have any advice but ((hugs)) I hope you figure it out. I'm sure that is very frustrating. Good luck mama. :)

SeanandNoahsmom
by on Feb. 21, 2010 at 10:18 PM

I was thinking the same thing- take the pediatricians advice on this one. Good luck.

Quoting asesnick1:

If he is not talking much and is also hitting himself, I would seriously consider taking him to the specialist.  I don't want to scare you, but it could be a developmental issue.  It is very common in kids who aren't able to express themselves in words to take out frustrations on themselves.  Please don't take this like I am saying there is something wrong with your son, it could be nothing, but I think it is better to be safe about these things, especialy if your pediatrician suggested it.  My son was almost diagnosed with an ASD, at 15 months because of a regression.  We were able to get everything under control because we found it early.  I just think it is better to be overly cautious with things like this.  Does he have any other behaviors or medical issues?  My son had/has digestive issues as well, that turned out to play a role.


Dawn
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