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What am I doing wrong?

Posted by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 6:47 PM
  • 19 Replies

It seems like as soon as my daughter turned 2, she's become a completely different little person. She's never been a difficult baby, but all of a sudden she's doing this thing where she throws herself on the floor and screams whenever she doesn't get her way. Even when someone doesn't respond to her fast enough. Its like everything just sets her off. I send her to her "naughty" corner but she doesn't stay there, instead she runs at me and HITS me! I honestly don't know where she gets this from, as DH and I have never hit her (or each other).

To make matters worse, DH is often sent abroad to work for weeks on end - leaving me to handle this alone. I'm 20 weeks pregnant (it was twins, but we've just lost one), tired, and I just don't know how much more I can take. I have heard of the "terrible two's" and her paed tells me she could be sensing the arrival of the new baby and not taking to it very well. I've tried to understand her and show her I love her, I've been so patient with her. But I have to admit that sometimes it gets so stressful that I get so close to shouting or raising a hand at her. Especially when she gets like this in public. I don't know what I should do anymore...its making me doubt all the parenting approaches that I once thought were right. I mean, if positive reinforcement and a 'no spanking' policy obviously isn't working, should I be doing something else? So sorry for the long rant, any advice would be so great.

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by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 6:47 PM
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Replies (1-10):
nf1
by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 7:27 PM

hugs

thangelbabybug
by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 7:35 PM
I've got 3 kiddos, my dd was the worse of the bunch and she's the oldest. She drives me crazy!! I love that little girl with all I've got but she just pushes my buttons and always has! It will get easier when she is 3. I know it seems like forever away but it gets easier. She's learning how to talk and express themselves and finding out who they are already, crazy as it seems. Just try to let the little things go and pick your battles.
st0ry
by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 9:00 PM

aww, thank you. I needed that :)

st0ry
by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 9:06 PM


Quoting thangelbabybug:

I've got 3 kiddos, my dd was the worse of the bunch and she's the oldest. She drives me crazy!! I love that little girl with all I've got but she just pushes my buttons and always has! It will get easier when she is 3. I know it seems like forever away but it gets easier. She's learning how to talk and express themselves and finding out who they are already, crazy as it seems. Just try to let the little things go and pick your battles.

I'm so glad I'm not alone. Yes, 3 does seem ages away but I'm glad they eventually get past this phase. Or at least I'm hoping that's what it is, a phase. Thanks so much!

momtoonein06
by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 9:19 PM

hmmm I didnt go through that with my son at that age it started at 3 and he is 5 and still going on. He just don't listen and I put him in time out he is fine for awhile and then goes back to doing what I just told him not to do. It don't think it happens at a certain age, its when they can learn to push buttons and know they do, they just keep doing it. Not sure why. Just being consistent and keep putting her back in timeout, she gets out of time out walk her back explain to her why she is being put in timeout, get down to her level, next time she gets out, walk her back until she stays as soon as she stays set a timer, once the timeout (2mins) is done, ask her why she was put in timeout if she cant explain tell her and tell her to say sorry. Good luck hope, she will get it eventually. Just let her know you mean business. 

chcon
by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 9:33 PM

 <Hugs>  Hang in there!

When I had my fourth baby, my 2 yr old was awful... I was afraid to have him near the baby at all.  He was sooo much more rambunctious than my oldest two.  I mean, they were each jealous of the new babies in their own way, but he was much more like what you describe.  I tried to find some time to do something special with just him, and as others say, picked my battles for the rest.  Giving him some special time with me (even over his two older siblings) made him more manageable.  Also, if he left time out, I put him back in it.  It is a constant struggle to get him to stay there, but he did get better.  Just be calm, consistent, and don't give in.  Try putting a toy in time out too, that might work better for her (we did that as well - especially the toy he most wanted at the time).

Anyway good luck!

arkansasmama08
by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 9:37 PM
You're not doing anything wrong hun. You've just got a strong willed little girl. Keep being patient and consistent and don't let her shake you. It'll be ok. **hugs**
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Army_Angel28
by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 10:57 PM

We spank our son and havent had any problems. He's almost 4 now. I'm a firm believer in a firm hand.

st0ry
by on Jun. 5, 2011 at 5:17 AM

Thank you so much for all the advice. I just wasn't sure if I should've been taking another approach with her. I guess consistency and just being firm is what I should be doing. Its more of me having to get my emotions under control and not lose it, otherwise she'll know what pushes my buttons. Thanks again moms!

bhwrn1
by on Jun. 5, 2011 at 6:19 PM

consistent discipline is what I suggest. What do you do to discipline?

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