Has anyone else noticed this gender-bias against boys?
Hi:
I'm a 31-year-old single mother of a 3-year-old boy. I have some questions regarding gender stereotypes made by society. Even though I'm a woman, I feel society tends to favor girls over boys.
I've noticed from an early age -- and continue to notice that -- women usually treat toddlers in a gender-neutral manner. However, men usually treat girl-toddlers better* than boy-toddlers solely on the basis of the gender of the toddlers. Why is this?
*better = the following:
1. More compassion
2. More sympathy
3. More respect
4. More gentleness
5. More easiness
6. More empathy
7. More cleanliness
8. More protection
9. More luxury
10. More personal space
11. More privacy
12. More security
13. More freedom
14. More modesty
15. More decency
16. More leniency
17. Less discipline
18. Less strictness
19. Less physical contact
20. More politeness
21. More Courtesy
22. Lower expectations
This preferential-treatment of little girls over little boys leads to gender-discrimination against little boys. For example if the adult in charge is a man and a little girl hits a little boy and he hits her back, the boy gets faces condemnation from the man and the girl goes scott-free. Now if the adult in charge is a woman, she usually treats the boy and girl in a fair and equitable manner.
Why do men favor girls over boys? Is any this anti-boy gender discrimincation logical or innate? Or is it learned behavior practiced [by men] simply to comform to societal norms?
I don't want my son to suffer this horrific prejudice against boys.
Also, am I hallucinating this sexism? Or is this really happening?
Thanks,
Charlotte
I've heard that men are more likely to stay with a women who bears him a son.
Age is a LOT more important -- in terms of childcare -- than gender.
Once again, as pre-pubescent children, girls are not worth anymore respect than boys.
Teach a boy to respect grown women but don't ever expect to extend this gender-specific respect to little kids.
Quoting TruthSeeker.:
That girl will BE a woman so it is logical to treat her as you would a female. One of any age. Respect for females doesn't start at age 13.
Quoting charliebean:
My daughter's name is Charlotte :)
I've heard that men are more likely to stay with a women who bears him a son.
I think for a lot of men it's important to carry on the family name. I'm not sure if only having a girl would cause someone to leave their spouse. I surely hope they wouldn't.
Quoting Mother_of_Boy:
Quoting TruthSeeker.:
You can nurture both sexes while still making sure the boy knows to hold the door open for the girl or allow her to go first, etc.
I've said it before and I'll say it again
As little kids, girls don't deserve anymore chivalry than boys do.
Sure they do. As with anything you teach a child, the early you begin the more likely it is to stick.
Quoting TruthSeeker.:They grow up with that respect with what they see everyday from the day they are born. It is ingrained. You don't just sit them down at 13(random arbitrary number) and say "you need to start opening the door for little suzie and stop hitting her". If you want to try it that way good luck to you.
So, from birth, you teach boys not to hit women and to hold doors open for women. Note I said "women", not "girls". No man or boy should spoil a girl rotten with gender-specific treatment during her childhood.
Quoting Mother_of_Boy:
Quoting TruthSeeker.:They grow up with that respect with what they see everyday from the day they are born. It is ingrained. You don't just sit them down at 13(random arbitrary number) and say "you need to start opening the door for little suzie and stop hitting her". If you want to try it that way good luck to you.
So, from birth, you teach boys not to hit women and to hold doors open for women. Note I said "women", not "girls". No man or boy should spoil a girl rotten with gender-specific treatment during her childhood.
I teach my son to hold the door open for the little girls in his pre-k class as well as let them go before him in the line for the water fountain. They are never too young to learn and a girl is never too young to learn how SHE should be treated either.
How's your kid's first day/week of daycare or preschool? Please share! :)
- Mother_of_Boy
on Apr. 16, 2012 at 9:47 PM