Did i do the right thing or was i to harsh on him
My 4 year old son was outside playing, i was watching out the window and talking on the phone. He was riding his bike, when i noticed he was carrying a yellow flower. our neighbor has yellow flowers in his garden cuz his daughter plants them. He is an older gentleman who lost his wife just 3 days after i lost my grandpa, so the flowers are a reminder to him of his wife.
well when i saw my son carrying a flower, i knew right away he was carrying our neighbors flower. I took him inside, gave him a 4min time out and told him he and i will take the flower back to the neighbor and he will aplogize to him for wrecking his garden that his daughter did up so nicely. My son was crying and had the flower in his hand and my neighbor said its ok you can keep it and your good boy.
Then when we got home, i told we do not take other peoples flowers out of their gardens, its rude, and disrespectful. And then i asked him would you like it if one of the neighbor hood kids took one of bikes from our yard. He said no, i then asked him why, and he said it would make him sad and mad. I said well thats how it would make the neighbor feel. Grant it the gentlemen was nice about it and let my son keep the flower.
Did i do the right thing? how would you handle this. I was in so much shock and disbelife he did that ever since he his teacher talked to him about flowers and gardens, he turns around and wrecks someones garden.
Quoting MelCarter1223:
Maybe he didn't realize that he was doing anything wrong. At 4, they don't really know that the flowers aren't just pretty little things to give to Mommy. He probably actually picked it for you. Not trying to make you feel bad. Just saying his heart might have out ruled his mind. He may have just thought you deserved something really pretty as a way to show his love. At least that's how it would've been with my 4 year old son. Maybe you could've been a little softer on him but I, of course, do not know how often he's punished for this exact thing.
This. My son LOVES to bring me every dandilion he comes across and I constantly have to remind him that we do not go in other people's yards. He just beams when he gives them to me so I know his impulse control would go out the window if I wasn't there to remind him. It was good that you reminded him about other people's property but, honestly, you may have been a little harsh IF this was a first offense. If it's an ongoing thing then, I think you were fine.
Beth (32) DH (37) Tyler (5) Bayley (2 1/2)
yes, I belive you did the right thing mama :). In fact, you did it better than I could have :). Kudos to you!
No, thats not harsh at all, its a timeout and an apology when he did something very wrong, taking the flower could have really hurt the elderly man, its not like you beat the kid.
This. If he didn't know he wasn't supposed to do it I would have just explained to him why it was wrong.
Quoting Taurus930:
Did he know he wasn't supposed to take those flowers? And would you have reacted the same way if it were a different neighbors garden?
Am I overreacting?
- HLmom89
on May. 10, 2012 at 12:44 PM