Join the Meeting Place for Moms!

Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

Email:

Password:

(minimum 6 characters)

Screen Name:

Birth Date:

Send me email updates about messages I've received on the site and the latest news from The CafeMom Team.
By signing up, you certify that you are female and accept the Terms of Service and have read the Privacy Policy.

Toddlers & Preschoolers

Toddlers & Preschoolers > See Active Posts - Let's Talk!

Twins-keep them together or seperate???

Posted by

ddjnn

on Aug. 31, 2012 at 12:59 AM

28 Replies

So my 5yo boy/girl twins are starting kindergarten Sept. 4th, their school placed them in seperate classrooms and I panicked! I asked 2 weeks ago if something could be done to keep them together and they told me they usually like to split them up because they did not want one to thrive and one fall behind? I am not sure but I have always heard that they kept them together for the 1st year atleast? So, we had orientation on the 28th and dh and I chose to divide and conquer, he took boy twin and I took girl twin (their choice)... So twin girl is doing fine and does not mention her twin but about halfway through the paperwork I look up & dh is standing in the doorway of the classroom. He says we have to do something, they have to be together! He said boy twin just kept asking about his twin, saying I have to show her this! He was excited but he wanted to share the experience with the person he has shared everything with the last 5 years! So we were able to have them place them together but now when I think about it I wonder if we made the right decision? Should we keep them together or should we let them learn to be apart? I am lost! There is another set of twins in the same class and I don't know if it was the school or parents decision, what would you do? I have considered giving it a few months together and then seperate but I am not sure having to change things during the year would be the best idea?

Posted by

ddjnn

on Aug. 31, 2012 at 12:59 AM

Add your quick reply below:

You must be a member to reply to this post.

Join CafeMom

Replies:

1-10 of 28 replies

12 3 next last

bekalynne440

Bronze Member on Aug. 31, 2012 at 1:05 AM

1 mom liked this

I would go ahead and keep them together at least for this year. At the end of the year you can reassess things and decide what you should do for next school year. Personally I couldn't imagine slitting them up, especially right away.

jmoore10

Member on Aug. 31, 2012 at 1:06 AM

I think keeping them together now is good but later on different classes.

Posted on CafeMom Mobile

rkkeller13

Member on Aug. 31, 2012 at 1:11 AM

I would keep them together this 1st year in school to help with stress. Then ask them the next year if they want to stay together. Let it be their choice. Then the next year when they are used to going to school and can handle the stress, if they aren't already in different classes from the following year, then they could be separate. But I would keep them together the 1st year so they have one another to comfort each other f its stressful. Good luck momma!

Posted on CafeMom Mobile

HistoryNutty

Member on Aug. 31, 2012 at 8:44 AM

1 mom liked this

My twin brother and I never had classes together until high school. It worked for us, but not everyone is the same. I think just keep them together, since you've already done so, and see how it works out. If I had twins, I'd prefer them to be seperate, learn how to grow and socialize on their own.

mypbandj

Jen on Aug. 31, 2012 at 8:47 AM

I've always hear its beat to keep them seperate - but my friend chooses to keep hers together all the time. They are only in kindergarten and do rely heavily on each other so time will only tell if that was the right decision or not.

Posted on CafeMom Mobile

LAG33

New Member on Aug. 31, 2012 at 10:56 AM

I taught kindergarten and first grade for thirty four years and it is always better to separate twins or triplets if there are enough classes to do so. A few of the reasons are as follows:

It allows each child to become independent.

They learn how to make friends on their own.

They are not compared to the other siblings.

They have their unique relationship with the teacher.

Generally, schools do not allow siblings to be in the same class for these reasons.

For information about how to ease a young child's adjustment to school and other early childhood issues click on this link:

http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_ss_i_9_8?url=search-alias%3Dstripbooks&field-keywords=my+child+won%27t+listen+and+other+early+childhood+problems&sprefix=my+child%2Cstripbooks%2C381

Seans_mommy123

Member on Aug. 31, 2012 at 11:12 AM

1 mom liked this

Personally if I had twins I would separate them. It will give them the opportunity to make friends of their own and no rely on each other so much. They will still have their time together before and after school. They will still see each other at school during recess.

cabrandy03

Bronze Member on Aug. 31, 2012 at 12:15 PM

Personally if I had twins I would keep them together. There is nothing wrong in my mind with them wanting to share they're school experience with the person they are closest to in this world. I had a set of twins that I was close to growing up and I was always jealous of how close they were to each other, they were always such a great support system for each other. They were in the same class all the way through elementary school, and have had no problem being independent and pursuing they're own lives and dreams seperate from each other, but they still have that amazing bond between the two of them.