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Toddlers & Preschoolers Toddlers & Preschoolers

Advice? 3 yo DD Won't listen...

Posted by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 6:41 PM
  • 20 Replies

My baby girl is usually well behaved, but lately it seems that everything she can make dificult, she will! We're currently battling over potty vs diaper. But she also refuses to eat sometimes, she won't stay in bed, and she just WILL NOT LISTEN!!!! I have no idea what changed and why she is suddenly acting like this, and any advice would be very appriciated! Thanks!

by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 6:41 PM
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Replies (1-10):
mariesmama
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 6:43 PM

my  3 yr old tried to dive in the pond with me chasing after her saying no-stop she wont listen

CLEKate
by Bronze Member on Oct. 8, 2012 at 6:49 PM
1 mom liked this

It sounds like a typical 3 YO to me. They are getting better at pushing buttons.  They are getting better at testing boundaries.

 

 

If she refuses to eat, then she goes hungry.  It's that simple.  A child will not let themselves starve.  Put her plate into the fridge and pull it out later if she asks for food.  Also make sure you are always serving at least 1 thing that she will eat.  And make sure you are serving realistic portions.  I always start with small servings of things (less of the things I know they inhale) then after they have cleared their plate, they can have more.

 

 

Not listening is something that's a huge battle with my 3 YO.  He's been a defiant little crapper since he was born.  When he refuses to listen, I repeat whatever it is a 2nd time along with a consequeance of not following through.  The third time I tell him it's his final warning, restate the consequence.  If he fails to follow-through, I continue with the consequence.  The key with this is to pick a consequence that "hurts" enough (sending to room isn't usually good enough---but take away TV time, an after dinner treat or even a trip to the zoo and it really gets them thinking!)  It has taken time and consistency, but I rarely have to dish out the consequences these days---both of my boys know I mean business.

KoriLovesYou
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 7:26 PM

I realize that 3yo are naturally defiant, and I know I have to punish her, but what I'm really wondering is why her attitude changed so suddenly!? It just kinda threw me off. She is usually an angel, but just like a week ago, everything changed! 

Quoting CLEKate:

It sounds like a typical 3 YO to me. They are getting better at pushing buttons.  They are getting better at testing boundaries.



If she refuses to eat, then she goes hungry.  It's that simple.  A child will not let themselves starve.  Put her plate into the fridge and pull it out later if she asks for food.  Also make sure you are always serving at least 1 thing that she will eat.  And make sure you are serving realistic portions.  I always start with small servings of things (less of the things I know they inhale) then after they have cleared their plate, they can have more.



Not listening is something that's a huge battle with my 3 YO.  He's been a defiant little crapper since he was born.  When he refuses to listen, I repeat whatever it is a 2nd time along with a consequeance of not following through.  The third time I tell him it's his final warning, restate the consequence.  If he fails to follow-through, I continue with the consequence.  The key with this is to pick a consequence that "hurts" enough (sending to room isn't usually good enough---but take away TV time, an after dinner treat or even a trip to the zoo and it really gets them thinking!)  It has taken time and consistency, but I rarely have to dish out the consequences these days---both of my boys know I mean business.


bc19
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 7:30 PM
It is honestly just the age, they realize they are their own little persons and that they can say no and actually have an effect on things. They want to see how much they can push and get away with. They are starting to have strong opinions about things and want to be heard. Just stay consistent and it won't last too long :)


Quoting KoriLovesYou:

I realize that 3yo are naturally defiant, and I know I have to punish her, but what I'm really wondering is why her attitude changed so suddenly!? It just kinda threw me off. She is usually an angel, but just like a week ago, everything changed! 


Quoting CLEKate:

It sounds like a typical 3 YO to me. They are getting better at pushing buttons.  They are getting better at testing boundaries.






If she refuses to eat, then she goes hungry.  It's that simple.  A child will not let themselves starve.  Put her plate into the fridge and pull it out later if she asks for food.  Also make sure you are always serving at least 1 thing that she will eat.  And make sure you are serving realistic portions.  I always start with small servings of things (less of the things I know they inhale) then after they have cleared their plate, they can have more.






Not listening is something that's a huge battle with my 3 YO.  He's been a defiant little crapper since he was born.  When he refuses to listen, I repeat whatever it is a 2nd time along with a consequeance of not following through.  The third time I tell him it's his final warning, restate the consequence.  If he fails to follow-through, I continue with the consequence.  The key with this is to pick a consequence that "hurts" enough (sending to room isn't usually good enough---but take away TV time, an after dinner treat or even a trip to the zoo and it really gets them thinking!)  It has taken time and consistency, but I rarely have to dish out the consequences these days---both of my boys know I mean business.



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rnmom4lif
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 7:34 PM

i faced the same thing shortly after my LO turned 3. up till then i thought i was doing pretty good but when he turned 3 it was like a switch went off and somethig took over my sweet little boy. lol. hes 4 now ad it has gotten alittle better but it was definatly terrible 3's in our house. the thing i found to work the best was a behavior chart. for every day he was a goo dlistener ad did what he was told he would get to put a star on the chart. at the end of the week if he got X amount of stars he would get a prize or special treat. worked great for us! he would get so excited about putting a star onto the chart! o and as for eating the rule in my house- if u dont want to eat now fine, but the food goes in the fridge and the next time ure hungry thats what your eating. you dont get to go get junk food!

KoriLovesYou
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 7:42 PM

Thank you! I was convinced i did something. Because she honestly was like a little angel, and last week, like you said, a switch went off. Glad I'm not the only one.. And I just hope it doesn't last long. I miss my sweet little princess. 

Quoting rnmom4lif:

i faced the same thing shortly after my LO turned 3. up till then i thought i was doing pretty good but when he turned 3 it was like a switch went off and somethig took over my sweet little boy. lol. hes 4 now ad it has gotten alittle better but it was definatly terrible 3's in our house. the thing i found to work the best was a behavior chart. for every day he was a goo dlistener ad did what he was told he would get to put a star on the chart. at the end of the week if he got X amount of stars he would get a prize or special treat. worked great for us! he would get so excited about putting a star onto the chart! o and as for eating the rule in my house- if u dont want to eat now fine, but the food goes in the fridge and the next time ure hungry thats what your eating. you dont get to go get junk food!


rnmom4lif
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 7:53 PM

 o no hon, its not u, dont worry. everyone keeps telling me it gets alot easier once they hit 5.....lol

Quoting KoriLovesYou:

Thank you! I was convinced i did something. Because she honestly was like a little angel, and last week, like you said, a switch went off. Glad I'm not the only one.. And I just hope it doesn't last long. I miss my sweet little princess. 

Quoting rnmom4lif:

i faced the same thing shortly after my LO turned 3. up till then i thought i was doing pretty good but when he turned 3 it was like a switch went off and somethig took over my sweet little boy. lol. hes 4 now ad it has gotten alittle better but it was definatly terrible 3's in our house. the thing i found to work the best was a behavior chart. for every day he was a goo dlistener ad did what he was told he would get to put a star on the chart. at the end of the week if he got X amount of stars he would get a prize or special treat. worked great for us! he would get so excited about putting a star onto the chart! o and as for eating the rule in my house- if u dont want to eat now fine, but the food goes in the fridge and the next time ure hungry thats what your eating. you dont get to go get junk food!



KoriLovesYou
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 7:59 PM

Well, yeah, cause when mine turns five, I will no longer be in high school, and i can send her to school instead! xD haha jk. 

Quoting rnmom4lif:

 o no hon, its not u, dont worry. everyone keeps telling me it gets alot easier once they hit 5.....lol

Quoting KoriLovesYou:

Thank you! I was convinced i did something. Because she honestly was like a little angel, and last week, like you said, a switch went off. Glad I'm not the only one.. And I just hope it doesn't last long. I miss my sweet little princess. 

Quoting rnmom4lif:

i faced the same thing shortly after my LO turned 3. up till then i thought i was doing pretty good but when he turned 3 it was like a switch went off and somethig took over my sweet little boy. lol. hes 4 now ad it has gotten alittle better but it was definatly terrible 3's in our house. the thing i found to work the best was a behavior chart. for every day he was a goo dlistener ad did what he was told he would get to put a star on the chart. at the end of the week if he got X amount of stars he would get a prize or special treat. worked great for us! he would get so excited about putting a star onto the chart! o and as for eating the rule in my house- if u dont want to eat now fine, but the food goes in the fridge and the next time ure hungry thats what your eating. you dont get to go get junk food!




rnmom4lif
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 8:02 PM

lol. i think 3s are so rough because they want to be independent and do everything on thier own but they're still learning proper speech and proper behavior...whats right and wrong....once they hit 5, they can express themselves much better and do most everyday things with little to no help and they have a better understanding of whats expected of them, and whats right or wrong.

Quoting KoriLovesYou:

Well, yeah, cause when mine turns five, I will no longer be in high school, and i can send her to school instead! xD haha jk. 

Quoting rnmom4lif:

 o no hon, its not u, dont worry. everyone keeps telling me it gets alot easier once they hit 5.....lol

Quoting KoriLovesYou:

Thank you! I was convinced i did something. Because she honestly was like a little angel, and last week, like you said, a switch went off. Glad I'm not the only one.. And I just hope it doesn't last long. I miss my sweet little princess. 

Quoting rnmom4lif:

i faced the same thing shortly after my LO turned 3. up till then i thought i was doing pretty good but when he turned 3 it was like a switch went off and somethig took over my sweet little boy. lol. hes 4 now ad it has gotten alittle better but it was definatly terrible 3's in our house. the thing i found to work the best was a behavior chart. for every day he was a goo dlistener ad did what he was told he would get to put a star on the chart. at the end of the week if he got X amount of stars he would get a prize or special treat. worked great for us! he would get so excited about putting a star onto the chart! o and as for eating the rule in my house- if u dont want to eat now fine, but the food goes in the fridge and the next time ure hungry thats what your eating. you dont get to go get junk food!





KoriLovesYou
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 8:11 PM

Yeah, thast's true... My DD was a premie and didn't walk until she was 14 months old. She didn't talk until 22 months and still has lots of trouble with it. there are some days where she doesn't talk at all, just uses sign language (that i taught her.) So i guess that is very true..

Quoting rnmom4lif:

lol. i think 3s are so rough because they want to be independent and do everything on thier own but they're still learning proper speech and proper behavior...whats right and wrong....once they hit 5, they can express themselves much better and do most everyday things with little to no help and they have a better understanding of whats expected of them, and whats right or wrong.

Quoting KoriLovesYou:

Well, yeah, cause when mine turns five, I will no longer be in high school, and i can send her to school instead! xD haha jk. 

Quoting rnmom4lif:

 o no hon, its not u, dont worry. everyone keeps telling me it gets alot easier once they hit 5.....lol

Quoting KoriLovesYou:

Thank you! I was convinced i did something. Because she honestly was like a little angel, and last week, like you said, a switch went off. Glad I'm not the only one.. And I just hope it doesn't last long. I miss my sweet little princess. 

Quoting rnmom4lif:

i faced the same thing shortly after my LO turned 3. up till then i thought i was doing pretty good but when he turned 3 it was like a switch went off and somethig took over my sweet little boy. lol. hes 4 now ad it has gotten alittle better but it was definatly terrible 3's in our house. the thing i found to work the best was a behavior chart. for every day he was a goo dlistener ad did what he was told he would get to put a star on the chart. at the end of the week if he got X amount of stars he would get a prize or special treat. worked great for us! he would get so excited about putting a star onto the chart! o and as for eating the rule in my house- if u dont want to eat now fine, but the food goes in the fridge and the next time ure hungry thats what your eating. you dont get to go get junk food!






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