~Moving or escorting (manual guidance)~ "Manual guidance" means moving your child against free will. Guide child by hand or forearm. If child refuses, pick them up and carry them. ~Temporary timeout or social isolation~ Timeout removes child from temptations of misbehavior to a boring place. Timeouts should last 1 min. per year of age. Ex. 2 years old- 2 min. in timeout. No more than 5 min. ~Natural consequences~ By experiencing natural coonsequences, your child learns from natural laws of the physical world. Ex. Coming to dinner late means food is cold, not dressing properly for weather, running on ice, not wearing mittens while playing in snow, breaking a toy, and going to bed late. Although its very important to have your child learn from these mistakes, it is important that they not be allowed to do anything that could hurt them or others. ~Restricting places child can misbehave~ This technique is helpful for behavior that can't be eliminated. Roughhousing can be restricted to outdoors. ~Logical consequences~ These are consequeces that you impose on your child as a result of their misbehavior. Making thw child accountable for his or her problems and decisions. Many logical consequences are simply the temporarily removing a privilege. Ex. takinf away crayons not being used right, having child clean milk they spilled, or mud they tracked in, turning off tv if children are quarreling about it. Do not punish child by depriving food, organized activities, or events your child has looked forward to attenting. ~Delay of privilege~ Ex. "When you finish your homework, you can watch tv" and "When you have tasted all your foods, you can have dessert". ~"I" messages~ When your child misbehaves, tell them how you feel. Say "I'm angry or upset when you do such and such". Your child is more likely to respond positvely then if you start with "you". "You" triggers defense. ~Negotiatio and family conferences~ As children get older they need more communication and discussion with their parents about problems. A parent can begin such conversation with "We need to change these things. What are some ways we can handle this?" «Be unambivalent» Mean what you say and follow through. Be stern and tough. Take charge. «Correct with love» Talk to your child the way you want to be talked to. Ex. "I'm sorry you left the yard but now you must stay in the house". «Punish child for clear intent of aggressive behavior» Try to stop your child from trying hit others with a toy before the damage is done. «Give consequences immediately» Delayed are less affective bc young children forget. Avoid making a long speech. Expect them to get worse before they get better. Children who are out of control initially go through a phase of testing their parents before the comply with the new system. This testing usually lasts about 2 to 3 days.
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