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help with sleep habits

Posted by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 11:49 PM
  • 4 Replies
My daughter is 18 months with THE. WORST sleeping habits. I don't know what to do. She refuses to sleep in crib and due to my school aged kids, its not an option to let her. Scream for an hour or so till she falls asleep. Here for the past week she is not going to bed til midnight. I am at wits end! Please help!
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by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 11:49 PM
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Replies (1-4):
MixedCooke
by Silver Member on Dec. 19, 2012 at 1:17 AM

does she nap in the day? her cut off time to put her down for a nap is 4pm.  what time does she wake in the morning?  while it is nice if she sleeps in, it is also the reason she is up late, so wake her when everyone else is up.  18 months is usually when the second bout of separation/stranger anxiety hits, so for mine, I gave her one of my sleep shirts so she had Mommy scent  for comfort and that worked well.  I also have white noise using a standing fan and soft lullabye classical music set on a timer.  I also do infant massage starting at her feet and rubbing towards her heart using lavender baby lotion.  Wouldnt you pass out after a full body massage.  You have to stick to a routine so she knows what to expect and starts to wind down herself.  We usually do bath, milk with words or night night show (Sprout Good Night Show Snooze-a-Thon is really good or the Pajanimals), then brush teeth, story, rub down and change while singing a favorite lullabye like Twinkle Twinkle or the lullabye song from Pajanimals.  I do the same routine absent the bath for naptime (sometimes a shower if she goes to the park, pool or sand).  Once in the room, the whole routine takes about 15 minutes with her passed out in bed.  Mine daughter is 2.5 yrs and this still works for her.

Luvmy2babies22
by Platinum Member on Dec. 19, 2012 at 1:41 AM

So quite honestly the habits are a learned behavior.  She has learned that if she cries she gets what she wants and so it continues. We are coming into a long break where your school aged kids won't have to get up for class so I suggest using this time to sleep train your 18 month old.  Make sure she's waking at a regular hour, napping early enough and then set her bedtime for a reasonable 8 or 9pm.  You don't have to leave her for hours screaming in her crib but if you want her sleeping in there then you have to keep her in there no matter what. 

What we do is go thru our regular routine and then leave.  If they cried we would go in after 5-10 mins (time depending on how upset they were) and rub their back, "shhhh" them, etc.  and then leave again.  If they continued to cry we would adjust our next re-entry depending on how upset they still were.  So on and so forth with the intervals increasing as they calm down.  You absolutely might lose a ton of sleep for the first few days but kids are smart.  If she knows you are 100% set on sticking to whatever plan you come up with then she'll stop fighting.  If you give in even 1 time then you will set yourself back 3 steps and make it WAY harder the next time.

I also agree with putting a shirt or something in there with her in case it is separation anxiety but it sounds like she has probably always had sleep issues so I would bet it's just more of a habit at this point that needs to be retrained.

Good luck!

itsm3
by on Dec. 19, 2012 at 4:27 PM

this.

Quoting Luvmy2babies22:

So quite honestly the habits are a learned behavior.  She has learned that if she cries she gets what she wants and so it continues. We are coming into a long break where your school aged kids won't have to get up for class so I suggest using this time to sleep train your 18 month old.  Make sure she's waking at a regular hour, napping early enough and then set her bedtime for a reasonable 8 or 9pm.  You don't have to leave her for hours screaming in her crib but if you want her sleeping in there then you have to keep her in there no matter what. 

What we do is go thru our regular routine and then leave.  If they cried we would go in after 5-10 mins (time depending on how upset they were) and rub their back, "shhhh" them, etc.  and then leave again.  If they continued to cry we would adjust our next re-entry depending on how upset they still were.  So on and so forth with the intervals increasing as they calm down.  You absolutely might lose a ton of sleep for the first few days but kids are smart.  If she knows you are 100% set on sticking to whatever plan you come up with then she'll stop fighting.  If you give in even 1 time then you will set yourself back 3 steps and make it WAY harder the next time.

I also agree with putting a shirt or something in there with her in case it is separation anxiety but it sounds like she has probably always had sleep issues so I would bet it's just more of a habit at this point that needs to be retrained.

Good luck!


celina0057
by on Dec. 19, 2012 at 6:25 PM

When my first son(3.5 yo) was born he hated his crib. He would sleep anywhere but there. We tried all different types of methods(Except CIO) and we got nothing. He refused to be sleep trained. Then when he was a year and a half we turned his crib into a full bed and he loved it. Is this possible for you? Or even getting a small toddler bed? Not too long ago he fell out of love with his bed so I bored this small toddler cot from my friend and he loved sleeping on it, then he just went back to his big bed again. I hope you find a solution:D

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