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He refuses to Poop in the potty!!

Posted by on Jan. 20, 2013 at 8:00 PM
  • 13 Replies

We have been potty trained (pee) since December, he's 3. He will tell us all day long if he has to pee but he still won't poop in the potty. He wears a diaper to bed still so he usually poops before he gets up in the morning or he will just poop in his underwear and then he will tell us he has to go. He knows where it goes, he knows he should go in the toilet but he just won't. We've had 2 times that he's actually gone in the toilet and we can't get him to do it again. Any ideas? He loves to play Mario Cart and I tell him if he poops in the potty today he can play but he still won't do it. I have tried rewards, I have tried encouragement, nothing is helping. Please help me get this boy to poop in the toilet.

by on Jan. 20, 2013 at 8:00 PM
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mommy2casidee
by on Jan. 20, 2013 at 8:07 PM
Poop is scary the more you push him the more afraid he will be. Some kids like my oldest could care less about pooping on the potty but my youngest it took some time for her to feel comfortable enough. It will happen!
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Luvmy2babies22
by Platinum Member on Jan. 20, 2013 at 8:08 PM
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You have to give him time.  There's nothing you can do if he won't do it.  Does he seem scared or just reluctant?  My DD trained in May.  She had pooped in the potty but generally would wait until she had a diaper on at nap or first thing in the morning.  The fact that 1) she had done it and 2) common sense told me she won't poop in her underwear in high school led me to just not worry about it.  I didn't say one thing about it, she just eventually started using the potty.  It was maybe a month or 2.

Your son is still relatively new at this.  Give it time and, IMO, start ignoring it.  Just take care of it but don't bribe or anything anymore.  He could be using it as a means of control so take the power away.   When he does choose to poop in the potty go CRAZY and take him out for ice cream or something special.  Once HE makes the decisions, try incentives.

amandakrysa
by on Jan. 20, 2013 at 8:14 PM

My son is 3 and I also cannot get him to go #2. he has been wearinf underwear since before he turned 2 yrs, but pull-ups at night. He waits for his pull-up to go #2. Just 3 days ago, I decided no more pull-ups, we are ripping off the band-aid. He has stayed dry all 3 nights but no #2. He doesn't seem uncomfortable and his stomach is not distended, but I'm still worried. We too have tried all kinds of rewards but nothing motivates him. I made him a treasure chest and wrote "booty rewards" on it and put all kinds of little toys from the dollar store in it but he doesn't care. Not even candy works and I am not a candy parent so I thought that would be a big incentive.

My parent educator said to get him a toy that he can only play with after he goes #2 and call it his poop toy. but I do not feel this would work either b/c I would at some point have to take it away, and if he loses his incentive, how does that help?

I would also, like advice about this.

kris1stbaby
by Member on Jan. 20, 2013 at 8:18 PM

That's what I was hoping his "car game" would be for. He hasn't been able to play it in a while so I thought he would try to go just to play but it hasn't happened yet. One day it will, I'm just impatient :)


Quoting amandakrysa:

My son is 3 and I also cannot get him to go #2. he has been wearinf underwear since before he turned 2 yrs, but pull-ups at night. He waits for his pull-up to go #2. Just 3 days ago, I decided no more pull-ups, we are ripping off the band-aid. He has stayed dry all 3 nights but no #2. He doesn't seem uncomfortable and his stomach is not distended, but I'm still worried. We too have tried all kinds of rewards but nothing motivates him. I made him a treasure chest and wrote "booty rewards" on it and put all kinds of little toys from the dollar store in it but he doesn't care. Not even candy works and I am not a candy parent so I thought that would be a big incentive.

My parent educator said to get him a toy that he can only play with after he goes #2 and call it his poop toy. but I do not feel this would work either b/c I would at some point have to take it away, and if he loses his incentive, how does that help?

I would also, like advice about this.



PAmommy32
by Bronze Member on Jan. 20, 2013 at 8:30 PM
1 mom liked this

My son just turned 3 and he is finally trained.  He pooped in his underwear for a few weeks after he got the pee part down.  I think it was just new for him and he needed to figure it out.  I didn't bribe, reward, or threaten.  When he pooped in his underwear I walked him to the bathroom and had him help clean up and we flushed the poop then went about our day as usual.  I watched him pretty closely for a while and when I saw him act like he was going to go I rushed him to the potty so he could get the feel of doing it sitting down. 

hwifeandmom
by on Jan. 21, 2013 at 8:26 PM

Let him ask for a diaper to poop in.  Once he's well in the habit of asking for a diaper when he needs to poop (a few weeks or so), then pick a new date to poop potty train.  On the designated day, when he asks for a diaper, take him to the toilet instead.  Since he'll have asked for a diaper, you'll know his urge to poop is strong, so take advantage of it.

If you think he'll try to withhold his poop, then a day or two before you begin poop training, begin giving him a 1/2 dose of a stool softening laxative (miralax, benefiber, fiber choice, etc) DAILY until he's fully poop trained.

momtoBrenna
by on Jan. 21, 2013 at 11:01 PM

I have a technique that we used for our ds that we got from a friend who is a behavioral therapist. It's long so if you want to message me, I can lay it out for you. It worked for our ds in a week even through the stomach flu. 

kris1stbaby
by Member on Jan. 21, 2013 at 11:57 PM

I wish it was that easy but he hates to wear a diaper now. He wears one at bed time but fights me on it so I'm not sure that would work, I wish it would.


Quoting hwifeandmom:

Let him ask for a diaper to poop in.  Once he's well in the habit of asking for a diaper when he needs to poop (a few weeks or so), then pick a new date to poop potty train.  On the designated day, when he asks for a diaper, take him to the toilet instead.  Since he'll have asked for a diaper, you'll know his urge to poop is strong, so take advantage of it.

If you think he'll try to withhold his poop, then a day or two before you begin poop training, begin giving him a 1/2 dose of a stool softening laxative (miralax, benefiber, fiber choice, etc) DAILY until he's fully poop trained.



ragitty
by on Jan. 22, 2013 at 12:09 AM

Ds was the exact same way. We started potty training a little after 2.5 years and he got pottying down right away. It took him a few months to get the whole pooping thing down, though. He at first saved it for his night time diaper but then he just started having accidents. I don't know what happened, but all of a sudden it just clicked. He has had one accident in the past month and a half (since he turned 3) and it was potty and he was in the process of taking off his pants to go potty in the toilet. Dh thinks his bribery (dh started giving ds a piece of candy whenever he pooped in the big boy potty) but I don't know. I don't have any advice because I have no clue what happened to make it click. Until then just keep encouraging him and it will happen. It's only been since December and it is really common for kids to struggle with pooping in the potty (I did a lot of research when we were struggling with it) but it will come in time. Hang in there!

ragitty
by on Jan. 22, 2013 at 12:12 AM

Is he okay with pullups? We finished off our pack of diapers we still had but when we switched to pull-ups ds got really excited about the cars on them.


Quoting kris1stbaby:

I wish it was that easy but he hates to wear a diaper now. He wears one at bed time but fights me on it so I'm not sure that would work, I wish it would.


Quoting hwifeandmom:

Let him ask for a diaper to poop in.  Once he's well in the habit of asking for a diaper when he needs to poop (a few weeks or so), then pick a new date to poop potty train.  On the designated day, when he asks for a diaper, take him to the toilet instead.  Since he'll have asked for a diaper, you'll know his urge to poop is strong, so take advantage of it.

If you think he'll try to withhold his poop, then a day or two before you begin poop training, begin giving him a 1/2 dose of a stool softening laxative (miralax, benefiber, fiber choice, etc) DAILY until he's fully poop trained.





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