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I am having red flag moments about my sons preschool...

Posted by on Feb. 24, 2013 at 3:09 PM
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My son has been attending a new preschool for the last 9 months.  There has been little to no communication about my sons progress, daily activities or future events or projects.

I recently found out that my son cries everyday at school.  This is strange because although my son is sensitve, he is easily consolable.  I found a note attached to my son's back pack that said that she accidentally hit him while opening a marker.  She stated that he accused her of doing it on purpose and she told him it was an accident.  Nothing unusualy or upsetting about the not so far.  Then she said it took him 10 minutes to recover.  That was it.  So I se the timer for 10 minutes.  The red flags for me were that a simple verbal explaination would have been more appropriate.  What does "recover" mean.  Does she feel like my four year old son completely understood what "on purpose" or what "it was an accident" fully means?  And finally what is the only disturbing part of the written note was that she did not explain or feel the need to tell me how she tried to comfort him in the 10 minutes that she claims it took for him to recover.  My son has had kids hit him on purpose, he has had a brain operation, he has been disappointed and frustrated countless time in his life and it has never taken 10 minutes for him to recover from anything.  I have red flags and since this happened two days after my husband and I met with the teacher to discuss his progress and to talk about concerns that we had about our son being allowed to "opt out" of all activities without any encouragement to join the class in whatever they are doing.  We saw a teacher that was very defensive, her body language and tone was showing us she was uncomfortable and when she couldn't answer a simple question like "what have you observed to be some of our son's interests."  Another questions that she could not answer was "what techniques have you tried to encourage our son to participate in class or in projects.   I don't feel comfortable sending my son to school there at this point because if she cannot verbally discuss a situation that she felt was important enough to send a note home for me read, but not important enough to explain what she tried to do to help him "recover," whatever recover means to her.  Because to me I am hearing that he was inconsolable or he was emotional for 10 long minutes.  I even set my timer so my husband could see how long 10 minutes is, and we realized that we had gone outside to look at a nest, we came in the house to get something, back outside, then inside again, all the while having conversations with each other, and the timer still had not gone off.  10 minutes is an extreme amount of time for my child to become inconsolable.  Even if she was exagerating, 5 minutes would be unusual for my son to remain inconsolable.  RED FLAGS.

by on Feb. 24, 2013 at 3:09 PM
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Replies (1-10):
mariesmama
by Gold Member on Feb. 24, 2013 at 3:37 PM

is he special needs?my 3 yr old goes to a preschool with a special needs teacher maybe the teacher doesnt know how to deal with special needs

TTC2Long
by Bronze Member on Feb. 24, 2013 at 3:40 PM
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Don't ignore your instinct. I'm sure there are other preKs to choose from in your area.
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Ktina11
by Bronze Member on Feb. 24, 2013 at 3:42 PM
Sounds like you need clearer information from the teacher.
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ausomezombie2.0
by on Feb. 24, 2013 at 3:43 PM

 

Quoting TTC2Long:

Don't ignore your instinct. I'm sure there are other preKs to choose from in your area.

 

snowangel1979
by Bronze Member on Feb. 24, 2013 at 3:48 PM
1 mom liked this
This.
There's a saying my grandmother used to say:
When mom goes with her gut, the kids are in luck.


Quoting TTC2Long:

Don't ignore your instinct. I'm sure there are other preKs to choose from in your area.

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collinsmommy0
by Silver Member on Feb. 24, 2013 at 5:37 PM
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Yeah I'd be complaining or talking with her boss to find out more answers, then probably just pulling her from that preschook
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ilana_ny
by Member on Feb. 24, 2013 at 5:39 PM

Change PreSchools  

KRIZZ25
by Bronze Member on Feb. 24, 2013 at 5:42 PM
is he around 3 ?..well my some has all was been a big cryer..but around 3 it got bad..so i taught his to talk and tell me what was wrong.. and u know what that helped big time.. he is almost 8 and hardly ever cry-es..he teels me wen he is up set ,what happens.
BlessedMammaof2
by on Feb. 24, 2013 at 5:56 PM
I'm considering the one crying incident could have many variables. Was he crying or just whinning? Was it truly 10 minutes or over exaggerated? What if anything did the teacher do to soothe him? Etc. Though it is concerning that he cries daily. If it isn't more than
just momentairly after you leave I'd want to know why. But what is truly alarming is that your child's teacher cannot simply explain what interests him or what she does to include him in activities.

Listen to your insticts. Seeing as you've already spoken to the teacher I would speak with her supervisor as well and go from there. Whether it is finding ways to work with his teacher or finding a new school.

My sons preschool gives us a communication handout daily. It lists all the activities he participated in, if he refused any, when he toileted, when and how much he ate, and if there were any incidents. When we pick him up the director relieves his teacher so we can speak with her directly and daily.
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.Angelica.
by Angie on Feb. 24, 2013 at 6:03 PM
I agree. I wouldnt keep sending my children to a school I wasnt comfortabpe with

Quoting TTC2Long:

Don't ignore your instinct. I'm sure there are other preKs to choose from in your area.
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