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Just put my daughter to bed w/o lunch...

Posted by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 12:17 PM
  • 11 Replies

...am I a horrible mom??

My DD used to eat anything and everything you put in front of her. Now, at 14 months old, she's starting to become more picky. She'll wave her hand in front of the food and say "no" and turn her head. Today I gave her some leftover Stromboli from the other night, and some avocado (both of which she usually likes and has eaten in the past). I figured at least if she didn't want the veggies in the Stromboli, she would pick around them and eat the bread and cheese, which she likes.

I'm really torn because on the one hand I want to make sure she eats a healthy diet and continues to grow well. On the other hand I don't want her to learn that she can say "no" to a food, and suddenly a new food will appear on her plate. I'm not a short-order cook!

I know this is probably a phase, and I know all moms have gone through this. Is she too young to understand the concept of "this is what's for lunch"? If she doesn't want one food, do I keep giving her other healthy options? It's frustrating trying to guess what she'll be in the mood for at each meal! She'll ALWAYS eat fruit...but I don't want to just skip to the fruit course of the meal and teach her that she doesn't need to eat her vegetables and meat.

Any tips you have for me would be greatly appreciated! I am a first-time mom :) Thanks!!


by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 12:17 PM
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Replies (1-10):
HopesNDreams
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 12:21 PM
1 mom liked this
You offered her foods that she likes and has eaten. She didn't eat them. Simple conclusion: she wasn't hungry. Offer her a bigger snack of healthy food when she wakes up.

Toddlers go through long stretched that they seem to live on air and sunshine.
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katinahat
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 12:48 PM

Totally this.

Quoting HopesNDreams:

You offered her foods that she likes and has eaten. She didn't eat them. Simple conclusion: she wasn't hungry. Offer her a bigger snack of healthy food when she wakes up.

Toddlers go through long stretched that they seem to live on air and sunshine.



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Christian, vaccinating, fun-loving, breastfeeding, cloth diapering, positive disciplining, nerdy, extended rear-facing, bookworm, creative, outdoorsy, autodidactic, friendly family.

"If you judge people, you have no time to love them." -- Mother Teresa

Luvmy2babies22
by Platinum Member on Mar. 8, 2013 at 12:57 PM

i think you did just the right thing.  she will not starve from missing 1 meal this afternoon.  we never had that problem when our kids were quite that young.  i also allow my kids to pick their own lunches.  if they barely touched dinner the night before, i don't even bother attempting to give it at lunch.  your daughter is younger, i get that there is a difference there.  when my kids refuse their dinner, they don't get anything else offered.  i always make sure they are given 1 healthy side I know they will eat and the rest is up to them.  i have done this their whole lives.  their refusal to eat certain foods started older than 14 months but i still refused to make them something else.  my only exception is if something is really terrible.  my hubby made dinner once that turned out all wrong.  we all ate PB&J that night!!! 

JTE11
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 1:24 PM

I don't know if this is right but for every meal (DD only eats two meals per day) I offer at least three things. Whatever I'm having as a main dish plus the sides, and I always add fruit to her plate. Sometimes she eats everything, sometimes nothing, sometimes only the fruit but I figure if she isn't eating she isn't hungry and we just quit the meal and move on.

Mrs.Velasquez
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 1:48 PM
Alexis gets like that, especially when sick. She'll refuse anything I give her, but want whatever I am eating. She doesn't really have meals. She snacks more then anything. She was refusing her bottle a couple days ago.but she had a little bug going on. So I stopped trying and just offered Gatorade with 1-2oz of water in it for a day. She's back at it again.
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mommyofnoah208
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 2:00 PM
You did the right thing. Its a bad habbit to just give them something else if they say no. Feeding my kids have always been my biggest frustration
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jlbelknap35
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 2:05 PM
No your not a bad mom, my kids rarely eat lunch, usually they are asleep during that time and I will give them a small snack after they wake up, have an early supper, and another small snack before bed.
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CelestialSong
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 2:22 PM

I've been doing the same thing with my daughter ever since she started solids. If she doesn't eat what I offer her, I assume she's not hungry and don't offer anything else. There are way too many kids out there who will only eat chicken nuggets and French fries, and I'm determined not to let my kid be one of them! I'm probably a meaner mom, because sometimes the only options I give mine are veggies - lunch will be a plate of broccoli, peas, and carrots. If I add something like bread or pasta I know she will just eat those and skip the veggies, so I make sure I set her up to eat enough good things.

MamaStrong13
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 8:36 PM

Personally I'd never put my child to bed without food, but that's me and that does NOT make you a horrible mother! For me, I give two to three choices and that's it. Usually my daughter is pretty good about choosing a choice for herself. I'll say to her "Keira, do you want cereal, a waffle, or pancakes for breakfast" (examples). And let her choose from those. This is giving her the control without actually giving her the control. She's at the age where she's going to start battling you for it. I'd say, try choices but let her pick before you make them KWIM? Good Luck, I'm sure you're nothing but a fantastic Mama! 

debramommyof4
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 8:40 PM

 I have had to do that with my 2 year old.  I hated it and felt guilty and she is my 4th.  But keep at it and she will get it.

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