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my 4 year old cut the kitten's ear, how do i punish?

Posted by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 1:09 PM
  • 10 Replies
ok, so, for the past 5 months or so, my daughter has been climbing onto the bottom part of the gate between her and my room,and reaching onto my computer desk and getting things she doesn't need. she's colored on her walls, cut up papers, shredded stuff all over the floors. i cannot have a door up because it's in the renting contract, and there is nowhere i can move my desk because it wouldn't be usable if i did. i have an 8 month old male kitten she and my son named 'mots'... this morning before i woke up, she took scissors out of my drawer and cut into his ear with them!! I DO HAVE LOCKS ON MY DRAWERS! this is the THIRD different set i've had to buy. she keeps figuring out how to open them. my question is, how do i explain to her that she needs to stay out of my stuff, and it is NOT cool to cut living things, whether it's an animal or a person. and hw do i punish her for this? she doesn't care if i take away her toys, spanking doesn't work, and i can't get her to stay in time out. wow, i just realised what a brat my kid is..
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 1:09 PM
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Replies (1-10):
debramommyof4
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 1:21 PM

If she was my child, she would be scared. I would take her to an animal shelter and have them explain to her why it is so wrong.  I probably would put the scissors higher also.  Like on top of the fridge.  Your dd is old enough, if she does not have special needs, to understand that hurt.  So I would also ask her if she would like me to cut her ears.

nerdymom28
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 1:23 PM

 How about you just move the stuff you don't want her to have out of the desk? As far as punishment though, I'm at a loss. If my daughter had done something like that, she would see the blood on the cat's ear and freak out and probably feel bad about it for weeks. She's cut her finger accidentally before, she knows that cutting hurts.

daughteroftruth
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 1:24 PM

 First off, take everything sharp out of the drawers, put them in a box and put them up where she can NOT get them.. period... and idk what I would do to punish her...

 

I'm not a spanker, but I would be tempted too... poor kitty... she could have hurt him much more then a cut...

pringles_697
by New Member on Mar. 8, 2013 at 1:28 PM

that's the thing, she DOES understand. and i moved them now, i honestly don't know where she got this pair from, i've never seen it before... when i asked her why she cut his ear she said because they're too long. i did ask her if i could cut her ear because they're big too and she started crying and told me no because it will hurt. she has ADHD, but i don't consider that special needs. she's always been really intelligent. she's in regular kindergarten at 4 and she can read about 40 words and spell her first middle and last name, and count to 100.

LucyHarper
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 1:33 PM
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If my child did that they would be in major trouble. First, scissors must be placed far out of her reach where she cant get to them since its obvious that shes not safe with them. Who has to get hurt next. Keep them in a locked drawer or box in a drawer, and by lock I don't just mean a child lock, but a lock and key. I would take everything away, all privaledges and she would spend the day doing chores and writing a letter of apology to the cat. I would talk to her and explain that cats are living things and feel pain and when she cut his ear, she really hurt him, and would ask how she would like it if someone cut her and made her feel pain. She would sit in timeout for a while first to really think about what she did, and make her stay, keep bringing her back a hundred times if you have to until she stays. I also would not allow her alone with the kitten for a good while and explain to her that she hurt the kitten so now you can't trust her with the kitten.

Luvmy2babies22
by Platinum Member on Mar. 8, 2013 at 1:35 PM

i agree on moving anything like that WAY out of her reach.  they also have taller pet gates that you may consider so she can't reach over it.  if she learns to open it, put a bell on so you can hear if she's trying to get past it.  it also sounds like she needs much more supervision right now.

we don't spank, we use timeout.  she doesn't stay because you don't force her to stay.  she's taking control of her own punishment and totally undermining your authority.  if you want her in timeout then you have to keep putting her back over and over until she learns to stay for the full 4 mins.  if it take 4 hours, it takes 4 hours.  you are the parent so what you say goes, period.  it sounds like she's not learned that yet so you just need to put the smack down.

i would also have very continuous conversations about being gentle with animals.  she needs to learn empathy.  take her to an animal shelter like pp said.  i also have always used the phrase "how would you feel if someone _______ you to?"  since my kids have been REALLY little i forbid them to step on ants or any other little bug.  we move spiders gently outside and have the conversation "that ant has a mommy.  how would you like it if someone stepped on you?" or "let's take the spider back home to its mommy or babies"  my son is 6 now and does worm rescues on the playground.  if they are in the play area or sidewalk he moves them so they don't get squished.  i feel it's very important to teach children that ALL living creatures have value.  start that conversation with your daughter and keep it going.  she's definitely old enough to know better.  protect that cat!

hollydaze1974
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 1:45 PM
I can't help you , I would have hit rage.
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MomOfOneCoolKid
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 9:49 PM

 


Quoting pringles_697:

that's the thing, she DOES understand. and i moved them now, i honestly don't know where she got this pair from, i've never seen it before... when i asked her why she cut his ear she said because they're too long. i did ask her if i could cut her ear because they're big too and she started crying and told me no because it will hurt. she has ADHD, but i don't consider that special needs. she's always been really intelligent. she's in regular kindergarten at 4 and she can read about 40 words and spell her first middle and last name, and count to 100.


 clearly she is very intelligent, but that doesn't mean she doesn't need extra help in some areas.

my son has adhd and i do consider that special needs, but regardless of whether or not it is or it isn't, it just sounds like she needs more supervision. More than a typical 4 yr old. I'm sure the amount of supervision you give her is good for a typical 4 yr old, but i just think she needs more.

MomOfOneCoolKid
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 9:50 PM

i wouldn't go for the punishing so much as making sure she has an activity at all times which is very hard, i know...

Anliena
by on Mar. 9, 2013 at 9:36 AM
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I think natural consquences are huge for kids. I agree about the time out and just putting her back until she stays. But as for a natural consquence.. take her to the animal shelter... tell her that hurting animals is a crime and she could go to jail for it. And say if she hurts the cat again, for any reason, the cat can't stay in your house anymore because its not safe. I'd scare her. I've done it to my son who hits or kicks the dogs when he gets angry anf its worked. Animal abuse is awful and can lead to horroble things as an adult so I would take it bery seriosuly, eveb at 4 years old.


Quoting pringles_697:

ok, so, for the past 5 months or so, my daughter has been climbing onto the bottom part of the gate between her and my room,and reaching onto my computer desk and getting things she doesn't need. she's colored on her walls, cut up papers, shredded stuff all over the floors. i cannot have a door up because it's in the renting contract, and there is nowhere i can move my desk because it wouldn't be usable if i did. i have an 8 month old male kitten she and my son named 'mots'... this morning before i woke up, she took scissors out of my drawer and cut into his ear with them!! I DO HAVE LOCKS ON MY DRAWERS! this is the THIRD different set i've had to buy. she keeps figuring out how to open them. my question is, how do i explain to her that she needs to stay out of my stuff, and it is NOT cool to cut living things, whether it's an animal or a person. and hw do i punish her for this? she doesn't care if i take away her toys, spanking doesn't work, and i can't get her to stay in time out. wow, i just realised what a brat my kid is..

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