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Twin 4 Year Old Boys Who Do Not Listen At ALL!!!

Posted by on Jul. 2, 2013 at 3:11 PM
  • 11 Replies

OK I have twin boys who are 4. They never listen. Like Ever. This morning they woke up before me i woke up at 0700 so they had to have woken up at like 0630 right after my parents left for work (we are on vacation and came to visit) and snuck outside to the back deck and filled up the kiddie pool and played in the water. (they went out the garage door cause its kept open for the dogs and it only leads to the back yard that is fenced in) Then they came back inside and went out the front door (i woke up when i heard the door. they ran across the street to the neighbors who are in the middle of packing a uhaul to move...yesterday they tipped over a cabinet and a recliner while i was in the bathroom...they run wild and no matter how many times i make them stand in the corner no matter how loud i yell no matter how many times i smack their butts they still REFUSE to listen...i am at my wits end...i don't know what to do...the dr says that they are adhd but he wont give them meds till they start school....i am going insane trying to find ways to keep them busy so they dont get in trouble but it seems impossible...please...i need help

crying frustrated

by on Jul. 2, 2013 at 3:11 PM
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Replies (1-10):
RobynS
by Robyn on Jul. 2, 2013 at 3:18 PM
2 moms liked this

Okay... breathe, mama. First, I would suggest NOT yelling. That's like a buzzer that sounds when they push a button. Buzzers are fun. They will continue to push your buttons if you keep yelling.

Have you tried taking away privileges or toys? That sometimes works with my 4 year old girl. She's not quite that rowdy or physical, but she can be very defiant.

Good luck!!!

AlexBryant
by on Jul. 2, 2013 at 3:24 PM

i took away the entier toy room (its the upstairs at my parents home) thats where they flipped the chair and tipped the cabinet...then earlier today i took away some other toys because they were throwing them into the ceiling fan...and i do try not to yell...they just push me so much...i hope that once they start school that this will stop happening so much because they will get social interaction with other kids (they have never been to daycare) but then im afraide that once they are in school they will get kicked out because they are so bad...

MrsLondon
by on Jul. 2, 2013 at 3:37 PM
1 mom liked this

Lol this made me think of the time that me and my cousin drove my grandmother nuts and she tied us to the table until our Moms got home. She had, had it!.. It's child abuse these days but it was funny then. We were around 3 at the time.

luckyme7
by on Jul. 2, 2013 at 3:47 PM
1 mom liked this
We get the child lock door knob wherever we go. Other mischiefs are fine, but getting out of the house is plain dangerous.
AlexBryant
by on Jul. 2, 2013 at 4:47 PM

BUMP!

kinshipcaremama
by on Jul. 2, 2013 at 6:40 PM
My hyper four year old boy does better when he's kept active and busy. Right now he's taking swim lessons. He loves it and it tires him out. He's less destructive when he's tired. lol
mommabear1038
by on Jul. 3, 2013 at 9:11 AM
I must say that reading this post makes me feel much better.i am having a tough time with my 2 boys too, this is recent though.mine are almost 2 1/2 and my other boy will be 4 in a week.and I am willing to bet all the money in the world that your boys (and my boys) would not be nearly as "bad", as "ballsy", as defiant etc if it were just one of them. Kids feed off of eachother. Big time. And with mine. ..ugh they entise (sp?) Eachother, provoke eachother, then omg if we only have one of something then I mine as well throw it out bcuz that one object will cause so much fighting its so stressful. They can have. Well I will just say a pair of sunglasses as an example, well that one pair of s.glasses can be literally broken, smudged , any ridiculous pattern, just sitting there collecting dust.but if one the boys picks the glasses up and wears them-then the other boy suddenly gets very territorial about those glasses.now if the boy that had em first makes the glasses sound "cool"-as in-"wow these are police sunglasses" well then its an all out war for them.then there's the times where its just not fair.example: for xmas my 4y/o got a laptop thingy, similar to a leapfrog. But my other kid did not get any type of cool electronic gadget so I kept the laptop thingy hidden in my closet.im back n forth about it bcuz my 4 y/o will understand how to use it better and he will learn from it.where as my 2 y/o would just press buttons. Whoa I am rambling wayyy off track (sorry but can u tell that I badly need another mommy to vent to,-preferably a mommy with defiant toddlers.) So my whole point is...my kids are either fighting over stuff against each other or they are working together.either scenerio equals destruction.do u think that if it was only one child that he would have snuck outside alone and crossed the street alone etc? Chances are slim.my toddler boys are dramatically less stressful when they are seperate.so...I have no advice for you other than to let you know that you are not alone.defiant children do not mean you are a bad parent. Also..are they starting school in the fall? My 4 y/o is starting pre k.i am very excired bcuz he needs it just as much as I do and my 2 yr old.now my 4 yr old has recently gone thru some sort of "change"--> which is anotjer thread-however, my mom keeps saying "what if his school kicks him out etc" well fortunately for us, its not like h.s. where they will just expell him.my heart tells me that he will excel , and I think yours will too-but, in the unfortunate case that they stay the same or get worse, you will have witnesses to vouge and they will give you tips and resources etc.so do what I do when I get overwhelmed. ...tell yourself. .."2 more months." But in the meantime-figure out ways to nake sure they cannot get outside.put a lock (s) on inside of door up high.high enough that they cannot reach even while standing on a chair.my brother is 34.when he was a toddler, my mom was a single mom.she tucked him into bed one night.then shortly after she went to bed.then at dawn she woke up to banging on the door.she got out of bed, opened the door to find two police officers standing there.AND MY BROTHER.so at some point while she was asleep my toddler brother woke up, figured a way out, was wondering the streets for god knows how long-and luckily 2 cops got him safely home.idk how they knew where his home was.but nowadays....ppffttt...IF THE KID SURVIVED, WASNT TAKEN, HURT, RAN OVER ACCIDENTALLY ETC ETC THEN AT THE VERY LEAST DCF WOULDVE SNATCHED HIM UP QUICK.
tiniowien
by on Jul. 3, 2013 at 12:11 PM

Mine doesn't listen either; 

Kathy489
by on Jul. 3, 2013 at 12:14 PM

Watch that Super Nanny show on TV with the English nanny for ideas on rules and reinforcement. She's really good. Start with small steps, hang the chores on the refrigerator. list consequences and rewards, etc. Make sure all the adults are on board and consistent.

xoxRachelxox
by on Jul. 3, 2013 at 12:28 PM

ADHD doesn't mean they can get away with bad behavior. 

How are you doing the time outs? Are they somewhere they can't play? Do you put them back every time they move? If they are screaming, do you wait until they're quiet to start their time (4 minutes) 

If time outs aren't done correctly, they won't work. 

Also, being consistent is important and if they do  have ADHD, a schedule is very helpful. 

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