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no punishment fits this crime!

Posted by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 11:07 AM
  • 20 Replies
My daughter (3) just poured a full bottle of glue out on the couch! What would you do? Serious answers please! Im at wits end! She pours out makeup, takes batteries out remote and loses them, shes drawn every color marker, pencil, crayon on couch, door, cabinets, floor walls! We have a nicehome itsnot like shes adding to thechaos! I usually yell and scream and timeout then make her clean it which she seems to enjoy. My house is falling apart around me because she destroys everything she touches! Help!


Most everything is put up or away... but i dont want tohave to go to the extreme of lovking everydoor and having a bare home because my daughter wont respect me or our things
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 11:07 AM
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Replies (1-10):
SecularMomma
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 11:09 AM

My daughter is the same way. I'm also at my wits end. She is just so destructive! The only thing I've been able to do is keep stuff out of her hands.

mers-mom
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 11:11 AM
I feel like i just have to survive this hell amd maybe someday after weve replaced all our possessions we can have nice things agsin. Sorry to be in the same boat:)


Quoting SecularMomma:

My daughter is the same way. I'm also at my wits end. She is just so destructive! The only thing I've been able to do is keep stuff out of her hands.


furbabymum
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 11:16 AM
1 mom liked this

 I hate to say it but it doesn't sound like stuff is put up. My DS isn't allowed to color anymore because he kept trynig to do it on the walls. When he's old enough to stop that I'll let him color again. So till then all writing implements are put out of reach. We have the doors to the bathrooms closed so he can't get to makeup, etc. We don't let him into our bedroom without us so that door is kept closed.

Honestly, the couch thing, I'd not let her use the furniture. Honest to God I'd tell my DS that he can't sit on the couch until he learns to respect it. He can't watch TV until he learns to respect it. He can't eat at the table until he learns to respect it. May sound mean but I bet it works.

corrinacs
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 11:16 AM

My biggest suggestion is to take those items away and not allow her to play with them for a long while.  When my son does manage to do something like this, I also make him clean it up.  Every single bit.  For huge messes, he's certainly required to help pick it up.

He's gotten close to really messing things up before, but I've reminded him that if we have to replace anything because of something he did.......he's going to pay for it.  He's 5 now, and he's starting to understand the value of money and property a lot better, too

Good luck!

corrinacs
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 11:17 AM

Exactly this.


Quoting furbabymum:

 I hate to say it but it doesn't sound like stuff is put up. My DS isn't allowed to color anymore because he kept trynig to do it on the walls. When he's old enough to stop that I'll let him color again. So till then all writing implements are put out of reach. We have the doors to the bathrooms closed so he can't get to makeup, etc. We don't let him into our bedroom without us so that door is kept closed.

Honestly, the couch thing, I'd not let her use the furniture. Honest to God I'd tell my DS that he can't sit on the couch until he learns to respect it. He can't watch TV until he learns to respect it. He can't eat at the table until he learns to respect it. May sound mean but I bet it works.




mers-mom
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 1:20 PM
Thank you for offering advice without judgement. Ill do mybest to put everything up. We lock doors as well (master bedroom) but we livein an older remodeled home child locks dont fit our cabinets etc. Shes lost allart supply privledges. I even started throwing away small toys when she would break somwthing beyond repair. Im going totry the cznt use it til you respect it thibg... likewhen she smears food on the table maybe ill makeher hold her plate in her lap. Idk... anymore suggestions? Imopen to anything at this pount!


Quoting furbabymum:

 I hate to say it but it doesn't sound like stuff is put up. My DS isn't allowed to color anymore because he kept trynig to do it on the walls. When he's old enough to stop that I'll let him color again. So till then all writing implements are put out of reach. We have the doors to the bathrooms closed so he can't get to makeup, etc. We don't let him into our bedroom without us so that door is kept closed.


Honestly, the couch thing, I'd not let her use the furniture. Honest to God I'd tell my DS that he can't sit on the couch until he learns to respect it. He can't watch TV until he learns to respect it. He can't eat at the table until he learns to respect it. May sound mean but I bet it works.


OBImomma
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 1:40 PM
My ds was like that. We put everything up, but he'd still find things. At 2yo he took the lid and safety cap off a bottle of baby soap and poured the entire thing on the kitchen floor, he got and opened a brand new jar of pb off the top shelf in the pantry and covered himself, walls and coffee table with it. He dumped glue in dd1s hair (he was newly 2 and she was 6-7 months).

I locked everything I could, hid things, made him help me clean up his messes, took privileges away. Time out didn't phase him.

He's almost 6 now and he has stopped for the most part. There's still the random act of destruction. But he's much better
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furbabymum
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 1:41 PM

 My kid would be sitting on the floor with the dogs. Since he'd then have mucho competition for his plate of food I think he'd learn fast. :P

The thing kids have to learn is that you can make their life pretty much not worth living.

Quoting mers-mom:

Thank you for offering advice without judgement. Ill do mybest to put everything up. We lock doors as well (master bedroom) but we livein an older remodeled home child locks dont fit our cabinets etc. Shes lost allart supply privledges. I even started throwing away small toys when she would break somwthing beyond repair. Im going totry the cznt use it til you respect it thibg... likewhen she smears food on the table maybe ill makeher hold her plate in her lap. Idk... anymore suggestions? Imopen to anything at this pount!


Quoting furbabymum:

 I hate to say it but it doesn't sound like stuff is put up. My DS isn't allowed to color anymore because he kept trynig to do it on the walls. When he's old enough to stop that I'll let him color again. So till then all writing implements are put out of reach. We have the doors to the bathrooms closed so he can't get to makeup, etc. We don't let him into our bedroom without us so that door is kept closed.


Honestly, the couch thing, I'd not let her use the furniture. Honest to God I'd tell my DS that he can't sit on the couch until he learns to respect it. He can't watch TV until he learns to respect it. He can't eat at the table until he learns to respect it. May sound mean but I bet it works.


 

zinniadaisy
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 1:42 PM

it needs to be locked away for the time being - mine go through phases of interest then move on, so it should only be a temporary, but necessary thing  We keep things in the pantry which has a kid-lock on it and in high up cabinets for the time being with our curious 2 yr old...

Luvmy2babies22
by Platinum Member on Jul. 24, 2013 at 8:33 PM

 it just sounds like she needs more supervision.  put up the destructive stuff like pens, crayons, etc. but other than that, she just needs to be watched more closely right now.  it's  not cuz you are a bad parent or anything, it's just her personality and you have to adapt your parenting and meet your child where they are.  say "if you can't be trusted alone while mommy puts away the laundry then you have to follow me (and help)!" or whatever.

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