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Advice Needed: I have a small problem....with my quadruplet boys

Posted by on Dec. 30, 2013 at 11:59 PM
  • 11 Replies

I have a small problem. I have quadruplet boys. Here lately they have been little demons. Most of the time a quick Do you want a spanking? or Does Daddy need to hear about your behavior? Will strighten up the behavior or issue im having. Here lately though me and my husband haven understood this issue. If my son Brandon gets into trouble and we are talking to him about his behavior then the others will come into the conversation to help brother out of trouble.

Im not sure but something tells me they have learned to out number us.

They will work together to form a way to help the other out of trouble. Doesnt work with my husband AT ALL! Me i try not to let it effect my parenting but i think its cute they are team working.

How do you punish them without punishing the team work and team building bond?

If you would like to email me my address is

marine.wife2@yahoo.com

by on Dec. 30, 2013 at 11:59 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Amybelle
by on Dec. 31, 2013 at 12:00 AM

uhhhhhhhhhh NO

usmarinewife1
by on Dec. 31, 2013 at 12:07 AM

 

Quoting Amybelle:

uhhhhhhhhhh NO

 That's similar to how I responded. Except mine was "What in the world I'm I going to do now? Why to throw me a curve ball boys!"

heathercm26
by on Dec. 31, 2013 at 12:28 AM
Punish them as a team. Then they will keep each other in line.

"I don't care who actually broke the lamp. You all were being very very wild even after I asked you to stop sooo you all can sit down for 5 minutes and then clean up the mess."

"Oh. He accidently hit you? Must of been Cruz you were all being to rough. Its time for a quiet time."

My ss is 8 and if I can't trust him to be on his own in his room or listen for whatever reason, he has to sit in a chair in the room that I'm in and miss out. Its not really a time out. It goes more along the lines of natural punishment.

Example: if you and sissy are going to argue and fight while I make supper then u can't play together. You both can sit at the table til suppers ready. Because I don't want you to fight. ....or break things.....or get into things ....

It makes them think twice and not try to explain it away because I just don't care why they were screaming or who hit who first or if something was an accident or if nobody remembers who did it. I just don't want it to keep happening so all the fun stops and CLOSE supervision follows every problem. Sometimes I hear them say to each other. "We r too loud. She is gonna come in here."

My nephew once had to spend about 2 hours holding grandmas hand as she did little chores around the house. He was about 3. He was a twin and they worked together too. He would take every opportunity to get into ANYTHING and everything. Sooo my mom said he needed to stay right by her so he didn't get into trouble. She hugged him when he cried and said "I know your so sorry for getting into things. I'll help you stay out of things." It was very gentle but he hated that two hours. She just smiled and held his hand until he absolutely wasn't going in a cupboard EVER again.

I made my 8 year old do that after he climbed the drawers in the bathroom to the counter.... for fun. He had to hold my belt loop or my hand for hours because he couldn't be trusted on his own. After all, who can have a rule about everything. He knew better.

It is very cute that they are team workers....but not so cute that they are partnering against YOU.
heathercm26
by on Dec. 31, 2013 at 12:36 AM
Sorry I'm so long winded. ...

Also, its OK to say, "mommy needs a break from you children. Its all too much. Go to desperate corners." At which point they all go sit and read in desperate corners and rooms for 15 minutes. Whenever one needs to pee or ask a question, that 15 minutes restarts.

We call that a mommy time out. I know men are the disciplinarian s often. And boys listen better to them usually but..... boredom is worse than anything to a boy. The hand holding or desperate corners thing can be worse than any spanking. You can do it all with a smile on your face and with out raising your voice. I find it works better to not warn at all. That way they never know when its coming and they regulate each other.
VinVanMom
by on Dec. 31, 2013 at 12:44 AM

I'd probably say mind your own business mr so and so. My dd likes to eavesdrop when her bro is in trouble and I'll ask her if she wants some time out too..she instantly says no and heads the other direction. 

heathercm26
by on Dec. 31, 2013 at 12:58 AM
1 mom liked this
****separate corners**** although sometimes it can be desperate

Quoting heathercm26: Sorry I'm so long winded. ...



Also, its OK to say, "mommy needs a break from you children. Its all too much. Go to desperate corners." At which point they all go sit and read in desperate corners and rooms for 15 minutes. Whenever one needs to pee or ask a question, that 15 minutes restarts.



We call that a mommy time out. I know men are the disciplinarian s often. And boys listen better to them usually but..... boredom is worse than anything to a boy. The hand holding or desperate corners thing can be worse than any spanking. You can do it all with a smile on your face and with out raising your voice. I find it works better to not warn at all. That way they never know when its coming and they regulate each other.
heathercm26
by on Dec. 31, 2013 at 12:58 AM
How old are your quads
usmarinewife1
by on Dec. 31, 2013 at 1:02 AM

 

Quoting heathercm26: How old are your quads

 5 Years old.

usmarinewife1
by on Dec. 31, 2013 at 3:01 AM

BUMP!

sarahfaith123
by Member on Dec. 31, 2013 at 3:50 AM
This!

Quoting heathercm26: Punish them as a team. Then they will keep each other in line.



"I don't care who actually broke the lamp. You all were being very very wild even after I asked you to stop sooo you all can sit down for 5 minutes and then clean up the mess."



"Oh. He accidently hit you? Must of been Cruz you were all being to rough. Its time for a quiet time."



My ss is 8 and if I can't trust him to be on his own in his room or listen for whatever reason, he has to sit in a chair in the room that I'm in and miss out. Its not really a time out. It goes more along the lines of natural punishment.



Example: if you and sissy are going to argue and fight while I make supper then u can't play together. You both can sit at the table til suppers ready. Because I don't want you to fight. ....or break things.....or get into things ....



It makes them think twice and not try to explain it away because I just don't care why they were screaming or who hit who first or if something was an accident or if nobody remembers who did it. I just don't want it to keep happening so all the fun stops and CLOSE supervision follows every problem. Sometimes I hear them say to each other. "We r too loud. She is gonna come in here."



My nephew once had to spend about 2 hours holding grandmas hand as she did little chores around the house. He was about 3. He was a twin and they worked together too. He would take every opportunity to get into ANYTHING and everything. Sooo my mom said he needed to stay right by her so he didn't get into trouble. She hugged him when he cried and said "I know your so sorry for getting into things. I'll help you stay out of things." It was very gentle but he hated that two hours. She just smiled and held his hand until he absolutely wasn't going in a cupboard EVER again.



I made my 8 year old do that after he climbed the drawers in the bathroom to the counter.... for fun. He had to hold my belt loop or my hand for hours because he couldn't be trusted on his own. After all, who can have a rule about everything. He knew better.



It is very cute that they are team workers....but not so cute that they are partnering against YOU.
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