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Toddlers & Preschoolers Toddlers & Preschoolers

My Child is a spoiled you know what!

Posted by on Jan. 1, 2014 at 11:28 PM
  • 16 Replies

I must admitt it is my own fault, I buy my five year old son something every time we go to the store.  Whether it be a toy or candy! I am lost on what to do now. It is a constant arguement when I say no and he won't leave the store with me! Any advice would sure be welcome! Signed Tshack!

by on Jan. 1, 2014 at 11:28 PM
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Replies (1-10):
collinsmommy0
by Silver Member on Jan. 1, 2014 at 11:41 PM
I would have him earn money at home to spend at the store through chores or whatever. Or give him $1 every time you go to the store & he can choose to save it (to buy a bigger toy or to put in savings), to spend it on a small item, or to give to charity.

I let my son pick a $1 item most of the time we go to target, but he has to be a good listener while we are there. If he's not, then he can't pick out an item. He's left crying one day but got over it.
JenD_77
by Member on Jan. 1, 2014 at 11:47 PM
I agree with collinsmommy0... but you also need to just let him scream. I've had to stick one or two kids in an extra cart to make them leave. Once to the car I explain why they can't act like that and how they need to be a big boy or girl for me to earn a treat. After awhile if not getting things every time they were fine.
You may have to go through it a few times though.. if you are brave enough go to several places in one day. Maybe he'd get the idea quick.
kam0011
by Member on Jan. 1, 2014 at 11:49 PM
2 moms liked this
Don't give in. Carry him out of the store when you have too. He has to learn he can't get something everytime you step into a store. Handle it now because it will only get worse. Tell him how you expect him to behave before you walk into the store. Prepare him beforehand. Stick to your guns, you are the boss.
RobynS
by Robyn on Jan. 2, 2014 at 9:15 AM
2 moms liked this

I agree. If you give into the screaming, he learns that screaming works. Prove to him that it NO LONGER WORKS.

Quoting JenD_77: I agree with collinsmommy0... but you also need to just let him scream. I've had to stick one or two kids in an extra cart to make them leave. Once to the car I explain why they can't act like that and how they need to be a big boy or girl for me to earn a treat. After awhile if not getting things every time they were fine.
You may have to go through it a few times though.. if you are brave enough go to several places in one day. Maybe he'd get the idea quick.



armyvet06
by Bronze Member on Jan. 2, 2014 at 9:20 AM
1 mom liked this
Let him scream and fuss. He gas to learn that when you tell him that he does not need to get something every time you take him to the store, that you mean it. Just don't give in to him.
mskeeinmd
by on Jan. 2, 2014 at 12:49 PM
1 mom liked this

I did the same thing.  I started having a conversation before we left the house that I have some errands to run and that he is to not ask for anything because I'm not buying him anything.  I tell him that if he can go without problems, whining or arguing, we will do something special when we get home.  It was an adjustment at first, but he is cool now.  We make ice cream sundaes, read boooks, watch a movie or play games uninterrupted and he really prefers that.  We talk about everything.

heathercm26
by Member on Jan. 2, 2014 at 1:22 PM
"Where are you going mommy?"

"To the store"

"I wanna go."

"No way. Sometimes you won't leave when its time to go. I don't like that so I'm going by myself. Stay with daddy."

Aaaaand........

If u are in the store and he refuses to leave, do u give in a buy him something?

From now on NEVER buy him anything. It makes him naughty.

"Why can't I have this?"
"Because it makes u naughty"

If he won't leave or throws a fit. Leave all your stuff drag him by an ear. Or pick him up and put him in the car. when u get home he can go lay down for a while because you are upset and need a break. Tell him that.



Quoting kam0011: Don't give in. Carry him out of the store when you have too. He has to learn he can't get something everytime you step into a store. Handle it now because it will only get worse. Tell him how you expect him to behave before you walk into the store. Prepare him beforehand. Stick to your guns, you are the boss.
heathercm26
by Member on Jan. 2, 2014 at 1:35 PM
1 mom liked this
In a way I have a real issue with a child demanding material payment for behaving. Or parents offering it.

I did it for a while until my 8 year old....then 7, figured out that system too well.

"What do I get if I behave?" If the answer was "nothing" he would not behave and would even say...."well if you buy me a toy i will stop"

He tried to hold me hostage for treats or toys.

I have a dog that wont sit unless you have a treat in your hand too. Its bull shit.
The kids are not dpgs that need to perform for treats. Going to the store is just a part of life. Part of me sees this type of thing as inappropriate as it would be to give a10 year old a high five and piece of cqndy for using the toilet.

Imo the op is in a situation akin to the 10 year old saying if you dont give me candy i will piss all over the bathroom

I know your kid is only 5. But that's old enough to have the patience for a trip to the store.

Make sure he is fed and not too tired also helps
Uhura
by Member on Jan. 2, 2014 at 1:40 PM

If you're going to let him scream, take him outside to do that. That's an appropriate place to scream, not inside. Carry him outside if he throws a fit or refuses to go and don't back down.


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heathercm26
by Member on Jan. 2, 2014 at 1:41 PM
I think the reward should be natural. If you are good u get a pat on the back and a happy mama. If you are a jerk, mommy won't like it or put up with it.
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