Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Help! Im losing my mind!

Posted by on Mar. 12, 2014 at 1:16 PM
  • 19 Replies
I have a 2 year old son. His name is Noah. He is so picky but not just with food (though he is extremely picky. He once went about a week living on milk bottles) we started giving him junk food... just anything to get him to eat. We were giving him toddler nourishing shakes bc he wasn't getting what he needed from food. But hes like that with everything! We were at my sisters a few nights ago and he was watching rvedly drinking his bottle and he wanted a blanket so I got him one and one for my sister well he threw a tantrum until I gave him my sisters. We typically have 2 different types of cheeses and if I give him one he will throw a tantrum unroll I give him the other. Even if he prefers the other kind. If I tell him no he flat out ignores me and keeps doing what hes doing and if I remove him he will freak out for hours! I've tried time-out. And he stays there but it doesn't phase him. We've tried slapping ha hand and if daddy does it..it upsets him but doesn't stop him. If I do it he laughs at me or spits in my face. I've tried spanking his but and dame outcome. He is in complete control. And I'm afraid to even tell him no back it will be at least a 30 minute fight. And I win but he doesn't see it that was. Hes manipulative and defiant and so mean. But he can be the biggest sweet heart. I feel like I'm always yelling and always mad and stressed our. I want more kids but I refuse bc I can barely handle Noah let alone another baby. I feel like the worst mom ever. My house is always a mess. If I try cleaning he literally with cling to my legs and bite me in the but. Idk what to do.. I'm scard that I have completely failed him as a mother. And as a wife
by on Mar. 12, 2014 at 1:16 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
Lorraine2674
by on Mar. 12, 2014 at 1:44 PM
My daughter did this at about that age ... I found if I gave her a choice (this blanket or that blanket) it helped... It was like she felt more in control if her self.
Deep breathes you are doing great!
Sigmalade
by on Mar. 12, 2014 at 1:48 PM

He is going through a spell. Get control! Pop his hand, put him in time-out, do what you need to do. Tell him there is no biting. If he does it, put him in time-out, take away a toy. Find what messes with him. Stay consistent. Handle a situation as soon as it arises. My ds would be rude to me. My dh looked me in my face and said, he only does it with you. Then I noticed how he interacted with other family and friends when I wasn't around and it was true. It was a tough pill to swallow, but it was what I needed to install rules and stick with them. Stay encouraged. Good luck. Stop the temper tantrums now. Keep experimenting around with food and know you are doing a great job as a wife and mother.

jackierose329
by on Mar. 12, 2014 at 2:59 PM
Thank you! Lately patience has not been my friend. I feel like I take it out on him and yes he is being naughty but its not his fault that I am struggling. But yes I definitely need to work on my consistency Lol its hard because its a long battle. He is very energetic so if he has complete and total attention he does alright as long as its what he wants to do. But I think I need a day to myself to get caught up on housework and possibly a little relax time (glass of wine and a bubblebath Lol) ya know.. step back from the situation and find my mind Lol and I think things will be better. Thank you so much for the encouraging words. My mother in law and sister I feel look down on me because I do things differently and house is never perfectly clean Lol so its so nice to have people say nice things. :) made my day
mem82
by on Mar. 12, 2014 at 3:55 PM

Just try to be consistent. It really is a phase. A horrible, terrible one, but he should grow out of it as long as you keep calm and discipline him...over and over and over. LOL

jackierose329
by on Mar. 12, 2014 at 10:04 PM
Thanks! I will definitely give it my best
LML1
by on Mar. 12, 2014 at 10:18 PM

 I've seen a DIY time out glitter bottle. Anything is worth a try at this point. Good Luck.

cabrandy03
by Bronze Member on Mar. 12, 2014 at 10:26 PM
1 mom liked this
You have to regain control. Do not give in when he throws fits, ever, no matter how big a fit he throws. He's learned if he throws a big enough fit he gets his way. It's going to be hard to correct this learned behavior but you can, you just have to be consistent.
As for the food issues, don't feed him junk just because he wot eat anything else, That's just going to set him up for a lifetime of bad eating habits. I have a very picky 3 year old so I know how frustrating it can be to get a picky kid to eat, but you can't just give him junk. I don't keep junk food inthe house at all, that way if dd is hungry she has to have something healthy. Just keep offering healthy options, he'll eat them when he gets hungry enough.

jackierose329
by on Mar. 13, 2014 at 11:30 AM
I will try anything at this point. Today hes decided to test me Lol well that's every day but today is hitting. But by the end of today I bet he won't hit me anymore. He will eventually get sick of having his hand slapped.. at least I hope Lol
collinsmommy0
by Silver Member on Mar. 13, 2014 at 11:38 AM
1 mom liked this
First, stop hitting him. That shows him that it's okay to hit you.

Second, I would start trying to make your home a more positive place. Praise, showing him what to do instead of yelling, having patience.

Third, id start a reward chart for him. Whenever he listens, plays appropriately, does something for you, he gets a sticker. After 10 or 20 he gets to watch a TV show. TV stays off otherwise.

Fourth, I would talk to your pediatrician and find out if this is within normal behavior. It doesn't sound like it to me - maybe get him evaluated
cabrandy03
by Bronze Member on Mar. 13, 2014 at 11:51 AM
I couldn't agree more. In my opinion spanking/hand slapping does nothing but teach it's okay to hit. Same goes for yelling. Try a more gentle approach so that your setting an example of how he should behave. We mostly use natural consequences. If dd throws a toy she looses the toy for the rest if the day. If she hits me, she looses my attention, I tell her I don't play with kids who hit and just walk away. Give lots of praise or even small rewards for good behavior rather then putting so much focus on the negative. And like I said before consistency is the most important thing. How ever yo decide to handle his bad behavior just make sure your consistent about it.

Quoting collinsmommy0: First, stop hitting him. That shows him that it's okay to hit you.

Second, I would start trying to make your home a more positive place. Praise, showing him what to do instead of yelling, having patience.

Third, id start a reward chart for him. Whenever he listens, plays appropriately, does something for you, he gets a sticker. After 10 or 20 he gets to watch a TV show. TV stays off otherwise.

Fourth, I would talk to your pediatrician and find out if this is within normal behavior. It doesn't sound like it to me - maybe get him evaluated
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)