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Toddlers & Preschoolers Toddlers & Preschoolers

4 year old won't poop in the toilet!

Posted by on Aug. 26, 2014 at 12:49 PM
  • 11 Replies
My son just turned four in July. Getting him to pee in the toilet was SO easy! He's been peeing in the toilet since he was 2, but for the life of me, I CANNOT get him to poop in the toilet! I have tried everything I can think of- rewards, brushing it off ("oh we can try again next time"), spanking, taking things away, making him wash poop out of his underwear himself, praising him the few times he has (when I made him sit there until he pooped)...I just don't know what else to do!! I wanted him to start pre-k this year but they won't let him bc he isn't fully potty trained! I'm so lost :(
by on Aug. 26, 2014 at 12:49 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Sigmalade
by on Aug. 27, 2014 at 8:21 PM

Are his movements regular or does he suffer from constipation? If he is regular, just make him sit until he goes. I had to give ds apple and prune juice. Ask him why he doesn't want to go. Ds was like that for a few weeks and then he grew out of it. Just keep talking to him and ask your pedi for suggestions.

HAHuskey
by on Aug. 27, 2014 at 8:25 PM
My mom would sit us down in our potty chairs with Apple juice and out favorite cartoons. We eventually just knew that's where we went potty.
Rosehawk
by on Aug. 27, 2014 at 8:33 PM
2 moms liked this

Talk with him. Find out WHY he won't poop. I had the same problem with my son when he was potty training. One day, after dinner we had the following conversation (to the best of my memory after 6 years):

Me: Is there ANYthing about going potty that scares you or bothers you?
He nodded
Me: What?
He hummed and hawed at this point.
Me: Please, tell me, I want to know so I can help you.
Him: Well.......
Me: Well, what? You won't be in trouble at all.
Him: Well, there's a monster or something that reaches up and tries to grab me or my poop.

Yep. We had a toilet monster. Okay, not really; it was the water splashing up and hitting his butt, but HE didn't know that. So, I showed him how he could squat on the seat to poop, and the water monster wouldn't get him anymore. Neve did have another poop accident after that. 

cj123573
by Member on Aug. 27, 2014 at 10:16 PM
We struggled for a little while because he learned how to pee standing up. I finally figured it out one day when he needed to poop and he was pushing and pushing hard enough that pee came out and it hit me and the door. Whole issue was resolved when we showed him how to hold his stuff down when he was pooping so he wouldn't pee on anything (which turned out to be the underlying issue). He was so very upset when he got pee on me.
Antsy33
by Member on Aug. 28, 2014 at 6:56 PM

I'm having the same issue. I have been asking her what's wrong with the potty- but I wonder if it is something like this. I'll ask her tonight.

Quoting Rosehawk:

Talk with him. Find out WHY he won't poop. I had the same problem with my son when he was potty training. One day, after dinner we had the following conversation (to the best of my memory after 6 years):

Me: Is there ANYthing about going potty that scares you or bothers you?He noddedMe: What?He hummed and hawed at this point.Me: Please, tell me, I want to know so I can help you.Him: Well.......Me: Well, what? You won't be in trouble at all.Him: Well, there's a monster or something that reaches up and tries to grab me or my poop.

Yep. We had a toilet monster. Okay, not really; it was the water splashing up and hitting his butt, but HE didn't know that. So, I showed him how he could squat on the seat to poop, and the water monster wouldn't get him anymore. Neve did have another poop accident after that. 


DeegansMommy10
by New Member on Sep. 1, 2014 at 8:11 PM
I loved this! It's so frustrating, but to hear this made me laugh. I may try this approach tonight..this is maybe the one thing I haven't tried yet. I never thought of him being scared of the toilet..he's always just told us that he wants to when we ask why he pooped in his pants :/

Quoting Rosehawk:

Talk with him. Find out WHY he won't poop. I had the same problem with my son when he was potty training. One day, after dinner we had the following conversation (to the best of my memory after 6 years):

Me: Is there ANYthing about going potty that scares you or bothers you?He noddedMe: What?He hummed and hawed at this point.Me: Please, tell me, I want to know so I can help you.Him: Well.......Me: Well, what? You won't be in trouble at all.Him: Well, there's a monster or something that reaches up and tries to grab me or my poop.

Yep. We had a toilet monster. Okay, not really; it was the water splashing up and hitting his butt, but HE didn't know that. So, I showed him how he could squat on the seat to poop, and the water monster wouldn't get him anymore. Neve did have another poop accident after that. 

Rosehawk
by on Sep. 1, 2014 at 9:04 PM

Yeah, I got "I don't know" out of him then. Or just the waterworks and gibberish. He's now 10, and STILL won't give straight answers.

Quoting DeegansMommy10: I loved this! It's so frustrating, but to hear this made me laugh. I may try this approach tonight..this is maybe the one thing I haven't tried yet. I never thought of him being scared of the toilet..he's always just told us that he wants to when we ask why he pooped in his pants :/
Quoting Rosehawk:

Talk with him. Find out WHY he won't poop. I had the same problem with my son when he was potty training. One day, after dinner we had the following conversation (to the best of my memory after 6 years):

Me: Is there ANYthing about going potty that scares you or bothers you?He noddedMe: What?He hummed and hawed at this point.Me: Please, tell me, I want to know so I can help you.Him: Well.......Me: Well, what? You won't be in trouble at all.Him: Well, there's a monster or something that reaches up and tries to grab me or my poop.

Yep. We had a toilet monster. Okay, not really; it was the water splashing up and hitting his butt, but HE didn't know that. So, I showed him how he could squat on the seat to poop, and the water monster wouldn't get him anymore. Neve did have another poop accident after that. 


FunMomBlog
by Member on Sep. 2, 2014 at 1:50 PM

I am frustrated by the same thing. My 4-year old goes poop, no problem. The oldest twin is almost 3 and goes poop, no problem. He even flushes it himself and puts the seat up and down (miraculous!). But the youngest twin has no trouble peeing in the potty (standing) but refuses to poop. I'm wondering if he thinks there is a poop monster now, too. LOL... I am frustrated because I've tried leaving the diaper off, which he will either hold it for days or poop on the floor (which is totally gross to clean up).  I just don't understand why and his twin brother goes poop with no issues. 

KChinapps
by Member on Sep. 2, 2014 at 7:30 PM

This never happened to me but my brother went through this with his daughter. What helped him was to make a chart and everytime she went in the potty (#2) he would put a sticker on the chart. Once she reached 5 stickers (or whatever) she got to choose a special activity to just do with her dad and that helped her A LOT. I think within 2 weeks she would go #2 on the potty no problem.

DeegansMommy10
by New Member on Sep. 25, 2014 at 1:50 PM
SUCCESS! We are going on about two weeks with no accidents! I tried again on making him sit to go poop at the same times, four times a day. Even went as far as to make it a competition almost-- "I bet you can't poop this huge!" (Making gestures with my hands). He's competitive so I guess it worked lol.
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