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"Daydreamy' Three-Year-Old = Red Flag?

Posted by on Feb. 23, 2015 at 11:29 AM
  • 13 Replies

My three-year-old (almost 3.5 -- March) has been labeled 'daydreamy' by his teacher. He doesn't really pay attention in circle time; she says he prefers to look at the letters and numbers on the wall, whispering to himself, and not really paying attention. It also takes a lot to motivate him and engage him in his work at school. (This is a school-day inclusion program; he's one of the typical kids.) So they flag him for that and for not looking people in the eye at school. This seems to be a 180 from last year, when he had a ball in his two-year-old classroom and often received glowing reviews from his teachers.

Now, I have a child with autism already, my oldest son. We know what to look for when it comes to warning signs. At home, my three-year-old is engaged, he talks constantly, he will do activities with us, and he plays with his brother quite a bit. He likes trains, he likes to reenact things from Thomas, and he's pretty self-sufficient in terms of playing. He can entertain himself for the most part. He does like to watch Thomas over and over, but also likes Curious George, Wild Kratts, and Peppa Pig.

I have no idea what to think. At school, he seems to be the kid that can't/won't pay attention and won't engage, or at least not to the level his teachers think he should be. At home, he seems completely typical. Because my son with autism was my first child, I have a very difficult time getting a grasp on what's typical and what's not. We have a conference with the three-year-old's teacher on Friday and, let me tell you, I cannot wait to get this kid graduated to the four-year-old classroom in August. We honestly wonder if he dislikes his teacher and that's why he behaves like this. 

Help?

by on Feb. 23, 2015 at 11:29 AM
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Replies (1-10):
LuLuRex
by Silver Member on Feb. 23, 2015 at 11:38 AM

Does he have any kind of speech delayed? My daughter is the same exact way and has an expressive speech delay. I had her  evaluated by a pediatric neurologist and the child study team. Both of them agreed that her behavior in school is related to her speech delay. She's like your son- at home totally engaged, affectied, social, chatty, great eye contact, but at school she does the same things he is doing. 



smileypv
by Member on Feb. 23, 2015 at 11:39 AM
No, he's completely typical in his speech. I'm stumped.
goddess99
by on Feb. 24, 2015 at 8:33 AM

He sounds bored at school to me. Maybe he's looking at the numbers and letters because he wants to learn and for him circle time is just lame. My dd was the same way.

Madelaine
by on Feb. 24, 2015 at 9:13 AM

My daughter did all of that at that age.  She was bored was what it came down to!

TigerofMu
by on Feb. 24, 2015 at 9:33 AM

The  things that the teacher is mentioning would immediately make me start looking for autistic flags, but it sounds like you have that knowledge and experience and you're not seeing it at home. If he behaved in a totally different way last year and he is completely different at home, then he may be either bored and trying to escape (especially if he is highly intelligent and has already figured this stuff out), or you may have hit the nail on the head wiht the dislike of his teacher and he's trying to escape.  He may be mimicking the behaviors he sees in his brother when he withdraws or is disconnected from the world.


AbbeysMom2013
by Silver Member on Feb. 24, 2015 at 9:47 AM
Is this classroom/teacher maybe not as engaging or catching his attention like the previous year?
jessicasmom1
by on Feb. 24, 2015 at 9:56 AM

it could be the teacher ... is boring

janessa27
by Silver Member on Feb. 24, 2015 at 10:33 AM

 Like others mentioned- it sounds like he is just bored. Hope things get better for you guys and at least the school year is almost over:)

la_bella_vita
by on Feb. 24, 2015 at 12:10 PM

I was very daydreamy and it normally occured when I was bored : ) 

egyptian_mommy
by Bronze Member on Feb. 24, 2015 at 3:23 PM
It very well could be that he doesn't mesh with the teacher. He could be bored in class. If he really doesn't like her or is uncomfortable in his class it could be that he's just tuning it out.
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