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I hate being a single mom!

Posted by on Oct. 19, 2017 at 2:13 AM
  • 10 Replies
This is not a popular thing to say, let alone admit. But, I don't think I'm cut out for this. Granted it's been 5yrs so far, but I hate it. It's like my mental state has gotten worse. My depression & anxiety is on a constant. I'm on meds, but the thoughts of suicide are becoming more frequent.I'm afraid that I will die young & my only child will be scarred for life. Everyday is an uphill battle for me,I'm finding myself trying to push down the thoughts of what if I could get my life back before the baby. Is it even possible to feel like my old self again? I was once ambitious, motivated & determined to succeed in life. Now, I'm barely able to get out of bed.
by on Oct. 19, 2017 at 2:13 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Kate_gill
by New Member on Oct. 19, 2017 at 7:33 AM

Тhe road appears under the steps of the person walking.

Sometimes it's enough to get up from the bed, make any makeup and go somewhere you've never been. 

The only this demand is to feel cozy and pretty. 

I remember my mom had a depression when I was a child and my younger brother was born. 

I thought she was just tired so much, but now she tells, that she felt almost dead inside in those years and could feel better only returned to work.  From my side, like from the child, I realize now, that there were lots of situations when I needed her MORE energy, more active, cheerful, loving. Some situations left a deep step in my soul and personality. Maybe even complexes. Let your child be your stimulus. Life is changeable. Whatever it is, it will not always be so.

Khooks
by Bronze Member on Oct. 19, 2017 at 9:14 AM
I’m really sorry. I really encourage you to get counseling and help talk out these valid feelings. Meds help a lot but sometimes you just need to talk about it and get help.
Junebaby18
by Nannerz on Oct. 19, 2017 at 11:02 PM
I totally understand. I was a single mom of 2 kids for about 7 years. Its exhausting and overwhelming. I had to take life 1 day at a time or I would have literally gone insane.
meigemann
by on Oct. 21, 2017 at 9:47 PM
2 moms liked this

My sweet friend you are not alone. I know that it may seem like you are but trust me I can relate. I have been a single mother for 15 years and everything you described I have felt at one point or another. I know the struggle of not having adult conversation. I know how hard it is to decide which bill you'll pay this time because you just can't seem to pay them all. I know what it feels like to know you should be spending time with your kids but your so exhaused you just can't. I may not know you personally but beleive me I know your struggle.

Do you have a support system? A friend who can come over and give you a break? Are you connect to a church where you can go and talk to someone you trust? Have you ever thought about talking to a professional who can help you navigate through some of these emotions? It natural to go through mourning over the loss of a dream, I know I did for a long time. It is never too late to find that ambition you once had, it's never too late to get back that motivation you once had. After 15 years I am finally at a place where I can do a few things for me and in a few months I'll be graduating with my masters and believe me I'm likely alot older than you are ;)

I'd love an opportunity to talk to more about this or to pray for you if that would help.

iamcafemom83
by Bronze Member on Oct. 22, 2017 at 7:44 AM
1 mom liked this
There is no shame in admitting how difficult it is. I think that is a strong thing to say.
What kind of support network do you have? Friends, family?
It sounds like you are in desperate need to reconnect with yourself.
I hope you find a way to make time for yourself. Dont ever feel bad for taking care of you
vera262
by New Member on Nov. 15, 2017 at 6:25 AM

Stop talking like this! You have a child and its worth fighting for!!! I`m a single mom too but it doesn’t mean that I should forget about my own life. The best thing to do is just accept the situation and move on! Find hobbies, something that could involve you and give satisfaction. But never be pity of yourself) You are a woman and it is a gift:)

gee18
by New Member on Nov. 15, 2017 at 7:13 PM
1 mom liked this
I’m so sorry you’re going through this but you’re not alone! I also felt like this up until recently, I seemed to have lost everything and also wondered the same but I realized my daughter was the reason I was still here and she deserves a better childhood than I did and although I was miserable with my own life I had to force myself to stop thinking so negatively. You just have to accept it and start thinking differently, you are your own worst enemy. Only you can change your way of thinking, I also took meds but decided I wanted to take control of my own life again and quit taking my medications. (do not do this) I struggled for 5 years with this but once I got rid of all the negative things in my life and chose to change my life around for myself and my daughter, I felt like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders. You have to fight your demons, don’t let them win. I am happier than ever alhough I’m struggling financially, I’m excited about what life has to offer. Don’t give up mama, life IS worth fighting for.
bballnurse
by Member on Nov. 16, 2017 at 2:16 PM
Do you have a counselor or a good friend to talk to? That can help. If the father's involved, take time for yourself when your little one is with Daddy. My sister-in-law has been a single mom the majority of my 12 year old niece's life. She and her ex husband divorced 10 1/2 years ago. When the theatre was open near her, she would sometimes see a movie when my niece was with her dad. Now, she will go to the library or do something for herself.
sonnyswoman75
by Member on Nov. 17, 2017 at 5:08 AM
I'm the single mom of a 17 month old. She is my motivation and purpose in life. I think without her I would give up right now.
Mamabear2015
by on Nov. 22, 2017 at 4:32 PM

Hi,

    I can see the agony that your in and I feel for you. I am a single mom of 2 as well and I understand the struggle that takes place everyday. you are strong and you can do this! have you contacted any local sources, like a counseling service? Weekly visits can help and provide a guidance to issues that come up. This might not be for everyone but the information is great. http://bit.ly/2a1dnty . You can do this.



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